My first thread! Hello everyone.
I meandered onto this site by accident, and I think it might be just the place for me to keep an online diary of my weight loss journey.
I am hoping that my anonymity will allow me to be truthful with myself, as I think one of my many problems is a degree of self deception. Hey ho. So if you'll have me here I am.
I'm thirty, married, one child and working. That's as much as you're going to get I'm afraid, at least for now.
My weight history.
Teenage: Looking back at my photos I think I was gorgeous. Curvy, definitely. Fat, never. Yet I always compared myself with the skinny girls, and that's always a bad place to start. Then at home, of course, I had the teenage dieter's nightmare: a dieting mother.
My mother who is now in her 50s as been on every diet in the world. She has lost and gained the same five stone for as long as I can remember. I remember joining in her attmepts to "sort it out once and for all" by fast walking around the local park (for three weeks). I remember gazing longingly at the Cambridge Diet packs feeling disgruntled that she had an "easy" way and I didn't. I started diets and stopped them within a week as the hunger took hold.
A thousand calories a day was the rage in those days. I learnt a lot from her. I learnt that I could only have one biscuit at a time (unless I ate them when no-one could see me); I learnt that if I looked hard enough I could find Jelly Babies secreted at the bottoms of handbags, bars of chocolate hidden beind tins of beans. I learnt the tools of a dieter's trade. I read Slimming Magazine religiously. I think my first offical diet was Rosemary Conley's Hip and Thigh Diet (remember that one?).
University: I put on quite a bit of weight in the first year due to alcohol and stodgy hall food. During the first summer holiday I toyed with binging and purging - which worked but I'm not by nature a neurotic person; I realised what I was doing was daft so I stopped it. howover, I did realise that people noticed when I was slimmer. For a while I did a bit of sport for the first time ever and my weight was a fairly stable size 12, then later on as exams took over the weight started climbing again, and I settled at a fairly unappy 14-16. I tried Slimming World at this point, but it wasn't compatible with the student life, or with me. Ooh I tried the Atkins too. Hasn't everybody?
FIrst job: accidental weight loss, for the first time ever. Being too busy to eat - never a problem for me before, let's face it - and walking miles up and down stairs every day, was a big help. Down to a curvy size 12 again. Looking good. Meet my now husband - lots of nice meals out. And of course happiness does make me eat (as well as sadness, boredom, frustration, and any other emotion you care to mention). Once we were living together, it really piled on. Rich meals (we're definite foodies), roast dinners every weekend, evenings out, lots of booze and always pudding. Suddenly I'm over twelve stone and a well padded 16. But thankfully he proposed.
The first ever diet which worked. WeightWatchers, lovely. A more motivated WWer you never did see. Two and a half stone in six months, and I kept it off too. Down to a size 8-10; going to the gym three times a week or more. I was NEVER going to get fat again. This is it. I threw out all my fat clothes and spent a fortune on a new wardrobe, and a slinky wedding dress.
I was evangelistic about WW, and I suddenly realised why I'd succeeded when I never had before. For the first time I knew I was going to do it. I was positive and I could visualise a slim bride. I knew I didn't want a picture of fat me on the top of my mum's TV for the rest of my life. Dieting was EASY. Really.
I was insightful enough to know, though, that I would be weighing in at WW for the rest of my life. I didn't mind that; I realised that I would always be a dieter.
After the wedding: I became pregnant on honeymoon. Did you know that these days we're told NOT to diet in pregnancy? So I didn't. And a combination of not counting points and permanent early pregnancy queasiness meant that I survived my first and second trimesters on a diet of cornish pasties, full sugar cocacola and lemon curd sandwices. Result? a five stone weight gain.
After my baby was born I couldn't get into a size 18. From size 10 to size 20 in 10 months. That's impressive, hm? Breastfeeding helped a little, and I went back to normal-for-me eating.
Which took me to where I am now. A size 16, twelve stone, unfit. Since having my baby I have read "French Women Stay Slim", the GI diet, the GL Diet, Drop a Dress Size in Two Weeks. I have joined WW again, and left again. I have paid for a three month subscription to cafeslim.com and a six month subscription to WeightLossResources.co.uk. I have been onto the LL, CD and Lipotrim websites. I have bought Slimfast shakes. I have bought running shoes, exercise DVDs, and a yoga kit. But the plain fact is, I still eat too much and do too little.
And it has to stop. My decision has been made. I don't want to diet ever again. But I don't want to remain overweight eiter. I don't want my children growing up like me, with a totally skewed idea of what food is and what food means. And I don't want them growing up hating exercise and being as sedentary as I am. So I'll be slimming from the head down. More on that later.
(Constructive) comments are welcome. And I would like to say, that while I think I've tried a lot of diets in my time, that's not to say I "disagree" with any of them really. I truly believe that if you stick with them, and they work for you, fantastic. What I know now, though, is that they don't work for me. So if you are commenting, please be respectful of the fact that I personally need to do this my way. I have loved lurking on the site and reading your stories and seeing your amazing pictures. I hope to join in with the chatting too. But what I don't want or need is people urging me to try Diet x or Diet y. I'll support you in your choices, you support mine. I hope that's ok with everyone, and the mods too.
To be continued.
I meandered onto this site by accident, and I think it might be just the place for me to keep an online diary of my weight loss journey.
I am hoping that my anonymity will allow me to be truthful with myself, as I think one of my many problems is a degree of self deception. Hey ho. So if you'll have me here I am.
I'm thirty, married, one child and working. That's as much as you're going to get I'm afraid, at least for now.
My weight history.
Teenage: Looking back at my photos I think I was gorgeous. Curvy, definitely. Fat, never. Yet I always compared myself with the skinny girls, and that's always a bad place to start. Then at home, of course, I had the teenage dieter's nightmare: a dieting mother.
My mother who is now in her 50s as been on every diet in the world. She has lost and gained the same five stone for as long as I can remember. I remember joining in her attmepts to "sort it out once and for all" by fast walking around the local park (for three weeks). I remember gazing longingly at the Cambridge Diet packs feeling disgruntled that she had an "easy" way and I didn't. I started diets and stopped them within a week as the hunger took hold.
A thousand calories a day was the rage in those days. I learnt a lot from her. I learnt that I could only have one biscuit at a time (unless I ate them when no-one could see me); I learnt that if I looked hard enough I could find Jelly Babies secreted at the bottoms of handbags, bars of chocolate hidden beind tins of beans. I learnt the tools of a dieter's trade. I read Slimming Magazine religiously. I think my first offical diet was Rosemary Conley's Hip and Thigh Diet (remember that one?).
University: I put on quite a bit of weight in the first year due to alcohol and stodgy hall food. During the first summer holiday I toyed with binging and purging - which worked but I'm not by nature a neurotic person; I realised what I was doing was daft so I stopped it. howover, I did realise that people noticed when I was slimmer. For a while I did a bit of sport for the first time ever and my weight was a fairly stable size 12, then later on as exams took over the weight started climbing again, and I settled at a fairly unappy 14-16. I tried Slimming World at this point, but it wasn't compatible with the student life, or with me. Ooh I tried the Atkins too. Hasn't everybody?
FIrst job: accidental weight loss, for the first time ever. Being too busy to eat - never a problem for me before, let's face it - and walking miles up and down stairs every day, was a big help. Down to a curvy size 12 again. Looking good. Meet my now husband - lots of nice meals out. And of course happiness does make me eat (as well as sadness, boredom, frustration, and any other emotion you care to mention). Once we were living together, it really piled on. Rich meals (we're definite foodies), roast dinners every weekend, evenings out, lots of booze and always pudding. Suddenly I'm over twelve stone and a well padded 16. But thankfully he proposed.
The first ever diet which worked. WeightWatchers, lovely. A more motivated WWer you never did see. Two and a half stone in six months, and I kept it off too. Down to a size 8-10; going to the gym three times a week or more. I was NEVER going to get fat again. This is it. I threw out all my fat clothes and spent a fortune on a new wardrobe, and a slinky wedding dress.
I was evangelistic about WW, and I suddenly realised why I'd succeeded when I never had before. For the first time I knew I was going to do it. I was positive and I could visualise a slim bride. I knew I didn't want a picture of fat me on the top of my mum's TV for the rest of my life. Dieting was EASY. Really.
I was insightful enough to know, though, that I would be weighing in at WW for the rest of my life. I didn't mind that; I realised that I would always be a dieter.
After the wedding: I became pregnant on honeymoon. Did you know that these days we're told NOT to diet in pregnancy? So I didn't. And a combination of not counting points and permanent early pregnancy queasiness meant that I survived my first and second trimesters on a diet of cornish pasties, full sugar cocacola and lemon curd sandwices. Result? a five stone weight gain.
After my baby was born I couldn't get into a size 18. From size 10 to size 20 in 10 months. That's impressive, hm? Breastfeeding helped a little, and I went back to normal-for-me eating.
Which took me to where I am now. A size 16, twelve stone, unfit. Since having my baby I have read "French Women Stay Slim", the GI diet, the GL Diet, Drop a Dress Size in Two Weeks. I have joined WW again, and left again. I have paid for a three month subscription to cafeslim.com and a six month subscription to WeightLossResources.co.uk. I have been onto the LL, CD and Lipotrim websites. I have bought Slimfast shakes. I have bought running shoes, exercise DVDs, and a yoga kit. But the plain fact is, I still eat too much and do too little.
And it has to stop. My decision has been made. I don't want to diet ever again. But I don't want to remain overweight eiter. I don't want my children growing up like me, with a totally skewed idea of what food is and what food means. And I don't want them growing up hating exercise and being as sedentary as I am. So I'll be slimming from the head down. More on that later.
(Constructive) comments are welcome. And I would like to say, that while I think I've tried a lot of diets in my time, that's not to say I "disagree" with any of them really. I truly believe that if you stick with them, and they work for you, fantastic. What I know now, though, is that they don't work for me. So if you are commenting, please be respectful of the fact that I personally need to do this my way. I have loved lurking on the site and reading your stories and seeing your amazing pictures. I hope to join in with the chatting too. But what I don't want or need is people urging me to try Diet x or Diet y. I'll support you in your choices, you support mine. I hope that's ok with everyone, and the mods too.
To be continued.