I'm back
Dear Wemitts,
I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your posts from the past week. It somehow feels like home coming in here. Hanz, I loved your photo, your dress was great, but you, your fabulous glowing face, your neat shape- you seemed content in that photo. Keep it with you always. When times are tough, as they often are, look at that day where you had lost 4 stone, at a good friend's wedding, and enjoying yourself.
Ronsy, I am absolutely loving your job! Now, the night time part would kill me personally, but I have this image of you, at home, dark outside, doing all the housework and stopping to sit and chat about tarot readings with these people. I loved the part where you said its like someone coming to your home- seems to make it more personal to know you are comfortable and they are, and you are working together. Ah I hope the time with hubby is going well, its brilliant to hear how you both have been through a lot but still work at being together as a couple. Love it.
Nee, home is a funny place. Sometimes I feel so relaxed at home, especially if we are sitting around having an extended breakfast, and laughing, not really at anything but just happy to be there. Then other times it feels like I'm in a goldfish bowl adn need out. I'm not sure, but I think it depends on my own state of mind. Sitting outside with your friend for a few hours sounds fantastic- I hope you opened up fully about the stress you are under right now. I know I do not have the same love of dogs as you and Jud but I have friends who do, so I understand it. Put this all down as character building- evry knock, every fallen expectation, every struggle- tell yourself you will be the better person after it. And if there is such a thing as karma or divine retribution, know that things will come good somewhere, somehow, maybe when all that is left is a miracle. Universal Savings Scheme perhaps. I am going to try doing something that I've read about a few times. Its about gratitude. Whenever things are really bad, I am going to stop and thank my higher power (personally for me thats God, but a nun told me I should use higher power when talking to others!!!!Those nuns are not what you would expect) for that which I do have (see below)
Collie - sign up for the sexlines - you know you want to hahahahha! do you think if I did, it would help me understnad the male mind? There was a lady in the TImes a few weeks ago (anonymous) who worked as an erotic masseuse. Her service was not about sex(she never had full sexual intercourse) but about massage and allowing men to open up. They would ask if they were allowed to touch her, and she allowed them, and said it was about how lonely they were and how cut off from intimacy (she stressed it was about intimacy not sex). Random story I know!
Judith, well done. Your son is flying, helping you in the garden, going off on hols. It sounds like he can stand on his own two feet but is grounded in his relationship with you. Do not go anywhere. You are part of this family here, whatever is going on. Step by step Judith. I find that my binges can go off the wire, and just one thing can make the difference- maybe not to my weight but to my mind, and that means more. If you want to talk here is the spot. or maybe just listen to us, and see that you are not alone. Any word back on the interview feedback?
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So I am back. I was away for a week- wed - fri residential fri night with my aunt, sat night on a girls night way back sunday and boxer boy called
mon- wed away on residential again.
Its a very busy time. I am just stopping now, lying back going through wemitts. My weight has stayed at 12 5 for a few weeks now, I had aimed to be at 12, but that's life and kicking myself will not help. Last week, I managed a few runs, 2 were 3-4 miles around a beautiful cliff path beside where we were staying. For some reason, this week i didn't which was not good, not just for running or weight loss, but for my mental health.
The next few weeks will be the same, and today I want to make a list of things that I need to do as in housework and bills and the like, jsut so that I do not get completely sucked into work. And get back running of course. Its only 3 months to the marathon.
But I need to re connect with weight loss. I was really interested in the discussion about surgery. I think after the marathon (lets face it, I will be running while overweight so a marathon is not the solution) I will join motivation weight loss clinic, which a friend has highly recommended. I need to work out costs and the like, but I think the idea of looking at why i eat is ideal. There is nothing about eating that I do not know!but why i eat, thats the big one.
Biker boy has not really been in touch so I am leaving it to him now. Its up to him.
Chat soon.
