Bostik's Finally Doing It :)

[nurseberyl]

Yeah moaning about non existent weight does seem to be a hobby of some girls!! There's probably some complicated reasons but I sometimes think it's just down to them wanting to draw attention to how thin they are!!! Like they WANT you to say 'don't be silly you look amazing blah blah blah'

I think a lot of women actually get a bit psycho over Food? I've noticed that it doesnt matter if they are thin/fat if your the only one at a table NOT eating Chips then they turn on you!!! I think you make the bigger ones feel like your judging them and the thinner ones can be soooo competitive!!!! I read an article about this new eating disorder? Can't remember what they called it but some women are getting obsessed with wanting too look like they can eat ANYTHING but still be tiny?? So they eat nothing but two cress stalks an work out for hours at home but shovel down the cheesecake an act like proper foodies in public? It's funny how such a basic function as eating can be such a twisty turny issue for women everywhere!!!!

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that is messed up!

Nice pics bostik, you can really tell the difference. I dont think i look any different in the mirror either. I really want someone to show me a picture or body shape of what I REALLY look like, just so I know, because I cant tell.

 

[Bostik]

Seriously legomom, I think that is real! I have a friend who in first year of uni looked healthy. Thin but healthy. By second year you could see she lost a lot of weight. Noticed bones sticking out more and stuff. We were actually quite worried about her. She is very skinny now. But the only pictures she puts on facebook these days is of krispy kreme doughnuts shes bought or dessert or cake or restaurant food! It's like cos you're really constantly eating all this stuff and that skinny? Proper doesn't make sense :s

 

[Bostik]

Going away until Friday tomorrow so dunno how this week is gonna go calorie wise! It's out in the middle of nowhere so dunno if there will be phone signal to check cals on MFP! If there isn't I think I'll just be trying to make sensible-ish decisions. Well apart from some days like Thursday is my mum's birthday and we'll be baking a yummy cake and I love birthday cake And maybe miss weigh in this week and wait til next week to see the damage lol.

 

[Squeezyweezy]

Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!!!!

I think you will have learnt enough by now to be able to make the sensible choices you need to stay on track. Hope your Mum has a fab birthday.

 

[happyhealthy]

Have a lovely weekend away. Just make good choices, keep your portions in check and you'll be fine babes <3

 

[Legomom]

Ooh have fun!! And eat the cake!! Mums homemade birthday cake is totally allowed!!

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[Bostik]

Lol definitely Just a bit scary? maybe. Dunno if that's the right word! Cos even on days when I have gone over cals, I've still logged it all as best I can just so I'm not lying to myself I guess. I dunno, maybe I'm just so used to logging everything now! Seems weird not to lol. Should be good though

 

[Shazzabir]

Have a great time Bostik, enjoy that birthday cake

 

[Bostik]

Thanks guys Have a good week all x

 

[Bostik]

Had a good week away! Tried to stay in calories and mostly did. Went over by a couple of hundred a couple of times. Shall see what the scales say tomorrow, shouldn't have gained though!

 

[Legomom]

Glad you had a good time I'll cross fingers for WI lol.

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[Bostik]

Half a pound gain today. But I think it is cos I ate so much crap yesterday even though in cals. So not recording this week. Just gonna weigh on Friday next week and hopefully it'll sort itself out after a week of being properly back on track

 

[Squeezyweezy]

Well done Bostik. Half a pound isn't that bad. Knuckle down next week and you won't even moice it was ever there.

 

[Bostik]

Yeah I'm not too worried about it. I know I didn't eat enough to get a gain at all. So I'm just thinking it must be all the junk I ate yesterday. Everything was from cafes and service shops and stuff cos it was like a 5 or so hour drive back home.

Oh and mum asked how I keep track of calories and that and I told her about MFP so she may get into this malarkey too

 

[Bostik]

I knew it Down to 206 today. Loss of 2.6lbs. Dunno whether to record it or wait til proper weigh in day. Think I'll wait til Friday. So happy Getting closer to being under 200!

 

[Bostik]

Okay, I'm mostly just writing about this so I can think about it in my head, if you get me?

Well most of my weight shifted over a few months towards the end of 2010 upto just before I started calorie counting. So I lost what I would guess is about 4-5 stones in just a few months. I was puking up most of what I ate. Not like anorexic type way. I actually couldn't keep food down. I went to the doctors about this and nothing ever came of it, just blood tests. Anyway, the constant throwing up has stopped. But I still have issues with eating certain foods. Things like spaghetti, I can't eat or I'll be sick. I've gone off rice. Most potatoe things like chips and waffles and smiley faces and stuff. Pretty much the only meat I now eat is chicken. Gone off curry recently. All sorts. My diet is not very varied anymore! And when I eat, my portion sizes are ridiculously small. I start getting full after 2 mouthfuls.

I never knew what any of this was. But this week when I was away, I actually enjoyed myself. Had a good time. Relaxed. Wasn't stressed out. And I was eating more than I have in about half a year. And I was eating things I haven't eaten in that half a year too. I actually had some chips the other night. Which I know sounds stupid, but I seriously haven't been able to have more than one chip in about 6 months. I've been really...well I wouldn't say stressed out, but that's what my boyfriend says it is. Like the doctor thinks I have depression when I really don't think I have. And my boyfriend is the one that noticed about my eating. He was just like you seem really happy there. And have you noticed you've been eating more? And when I thought about it, he was right.

I really didn't think I had issues with food, just that I ate way too much cos that's what I wanted to do. But now I'm thinking differently. I dunno. It's making me think about things, but I dunno what.

 

[Bostik]

Ramadan started today so was the first fast. This is gonna be real weird this year calorie counting it. It's like at 3am I had a bowl of cereal and some watermelon which came to about 200 odd cals. And then at 9pm when I can eat again, I'm having about 1000 cals in one meal! And most of that came from fried things like samosa's so I'm not having enough proper food I don't think. Can't be good for me. See how tomorrow goes!

 

[Shazzabir]

That sounds bit of a challenge Bostik. I'm sure as the days progress you will get into a routine

 

[Bostik]

Yeah. This morning I was still full from dinner so managed to get a banana down me. Think I need to not snack after dinner so I am able to eat in the morning. It's not even like I was hungry when I was snacking. Think it's just in my head that I haven't eaten all day so you should have a packet of crisps or summat.

 

[Squeezyweezy]

Ramadan Mubarak Bostik.

Is it possible for you to make things that are healthy and freeze them or put them in the fridge, ready to be heated up? Maybe make a pasta salad and some chilli or something?