Can we get too focussed on the numbers on the scales?

Leapfrog

Leapfrog

Champion actifryer
Right folks, here we go. Apologies in advance if this gets long, but I'm in contemplative mood tonight. It's ever since I went on a bit of an impromptu shopping spree yesterday. All thanks to the NSV thread and people talking about skinny jeans. As I posted on there, I've always shied away from skinny jeans as I'm not very tall and have what I like to call "ample" hips. Anyway, so many people had mentioned how delighted they were to get into skinny jeans that I thought I'd give it a try and ended up buying some. Beige (not black!) and French size 36, which is a UK 8.

Which is all very well, but I have to confess, although they are lovely and comfy, they are a tad large on the waist, so will have to wear a belt. Now that's what got me thinking. Where am I really going to on my weight loss journey? The smallest size here in France is a 34, which is the next size down and frankly there is never much available in that size. So what's the point of losing any more weight?

Really the only point is to get to my target, which I set at 60 kilos. But that's just a random number plucked out of thin air that doesn't reflect anything "concrete", if you see what I mean? Part of me wants to do it to actually get to target and then there's another part of me wondering what's the point if I'm going to struggle to find clothes to fit?

I don't want this to sound like a moan, because I do know how lucky I am to have achieved what I have. There was a time when I was frustrated that I couldn't find any nice clothes that were big enough and now it's getting to be the opposite - on my bottom half at least. I am a C-cup, so there is no way I will ever be a size 8 or even a 10 there, unless it's really stretchy fabric :D

I'm not really sure why I'm posting this rather long and rambling post. Just a need to get something down on virtual paper, I suppose. Or some advice from anyone else with the same dilemma about their "target" weight. Maybe I should look to maintaining for a while until my body settles down.

Any comments or suggestions gratefully received, as I can't attend class, so don't have the benefit of discussing it with a consultant and/or other members of group.
 
Good Evening

I've decided not to set myself a final target at the moment - and it won't be until I'm nearly 'there' that I do.

To be the 'right' weight for my height, I need to be somewhere in the 9 stone category. When I was 18 I was in the 11 stone category and people though I had anorexia.

I'm now in my 40s so have no idea at all what is 'right' weight wise until I get there. And then it will be based on how I feel, not what the scales say.

Well done on your loss by the way
 
Sue, thanks for your comments and you are so right. I don't believe in the charts that tell you what weight you should be, or set too much store by the BMI either.

My official "ideal" weight should be around 126 pounds. There is no way I could a) achieve that b) maintain it or c) look healthy at that weight.

I have lost weight in my teens, twenties and forties. It's strange but in my teens I settled at 8 stone 10 (122 lbs) and size 10 trousers/skirt. In my twenties I was the same size at 9 stone 10 (136 lbs), although I went down to 131 lbs and was too thin and really couldn't maintain it.

I'm currently (allowing for conversion from kilos, which is what my scales are) 135 lbs and a size 8. I don't look gaunt, but I'm smaller (though heavier) than I was in my twenties when I did look gaunt! I just don't "get" the numbers and it's making it really difficult deciding on a target.
 
I'm another one who would look ill at her "correct" weight. according to my wii fit I should be 7.5st!!! that's ridiculous, I looked ill and got "are you ok?" comments all the time when I was 8st at age 17. mind you, I was actually not eating well so that could be why I looked so ill.

I think you need flexible goalposts. I want to be 10st. I want to be a size 14, but I will go lower if I think I can and not look like I am dying.

your body changes with age, and everyone is different.
 
I think if you are happy with your current dress size, it might be time to call target :)
 
I was at my thinnest aged 23 and a size 12. In photo's of myself from that time, I think I look weird- a bit like a bobble head with huuuuuuge teeth (because my face was so thin).

Still, I was overweight and reccomended by my Doctor that I continue to lose weight. I wondered, do I look odd because I've never seen myself like this and I was unrecognisable to family and friends? Or do I genuinely look odd? The only way I'd ever know is to get random strangers to comment on my appearance.

EITHER WAY, odd looking or not, my goal to lose weight is not only a physical one. I worry that I'm not getting any younger and I have had previous troubles conceiving. If, at any point, I have to see a fertility expert I will HAVE to be at the medically detirmined correct weight for my height in order for them to help me. So I have no choice!! I will get on with looking odd :D
 
Firstly congratulations on your weight loss. You're amazing.

I agree with you, if you are at a healthy weight and you are happy with how you look and feel, there is no need to get down to an arbitary target you probably set at the start of your journey.

Well done again, I hope I have your dilemma some time in the future :)
 
Thanks for all your comments - and compliments! The thing is I can still grab (albeit small) handfuls of flab, so I know that there is still surplus weight that could be shifted. The difficulty is targetting it. I'm pretty fit and really pleased at how my abs are shaping up, but there is still wobble around the "love handles" and my hips, which I really want to shift. The problem (I use the term lightly) is that my waist just gets smaller and smaller, whereas I'd like to lose a last couple of inches round the hips. It's 3 poxy lbs. One lb off each hip and 1 lb off the ol' handles!
 
well done on your weight loss :)

I have not set a target and am not even sure yet in my head what I want to be and even though I have a long way to go, I will most likely stop when I get to a clothes size that I like and think agrees with me. Possibly a size 12.

People do get so hung up on the numbers and want to be really thin that I don't think as many people reach their goals as could because they find the whole thing just so daunting.
 
Well done on your losses :) And I think it's an excellent question you've put out there.

I think choosing a goal weight is good because it's easier to stick to a plan when there's a goal in sight. Unfortunately I think a lot of us forget that it really is a number picked out of the air, or because it was the weight you were at pre-pregnancy, or in school or whatever. And then it becomes almost obsessive that I "must" hit this target, which causes stress and frustration.

If you like where you are right now I say try maintaining it for a month or two (or three)...you may find that you'll continue to lose for a few weeks anyway while you find your balance.
 
Sounds to me like that last bit is more a question of toning up rather than getting any smaller.

I think that it's always hard to set targets. I told my consultant that I want to be back to size 10 to 12 which I was in the summer (instead of the generous 12 that December and Xmas has made me into). I don't know how much that will weigh. To be honest for me it's about looking good in my clothes and feeling healthy, not the number on the scales for me. Last year I followed the plan and exercised 5-6 times a week and never weighed myself. I had to get weighed when I rejoined after xmas so that I could get the new books and get focussed on losing the xmas gain.
 
Leapfrog said:
Thanks for all your comments - and compliments! The thing is I can still grab (albeit small) handfuls of flab, so I know that there is still surplus weight that could be shifted. The difficulty is targetting it. I'm pretty fit and really pleased at how my abs are shaping up, but there is still wobble around the "love handles" and my hips, which I really want to shift. The problem (I use the term lightly) is that my waist just gets smaller and smaller, whereas I'd like to lose a last couple of inches round the hips. It's 3 poxy lbs. One lb off each hip and 1 lb off the ol' handles!
Click to expand...

So as a woman you are supposed to have a bit of fat - unless you are a professional sportswoman (and I'm not sure you want to look like one of those). It would seem to me that if by loosing a few more lbs you would find yourself in a situation where clothes buying becomes difficult then it is time to stop. Think about how many people have started slimming as a result of a difficulty in finding clothes!! If I thought I would find myself in that situation again I would be most unimpressed.

You are at a healthy weight presently, you can find clothes relatively easily, and in reality, very few women are every happy with their bodies, so it might be a case of just accepting those tiny love handles, or getting some lipo :D
 
Leapfrog said:
You're all right, of course. It's the competitive part of me that wants to get to target, to reach the holy grail! If I stop short, it'd be like a marathon runner stopping at 25.5 miles!
Click to expand...


What?? Even if it'd make you smaller than you want to be?

When a marathon runner sets off to do their miles they have a very good understanding and knowledge of what the 26 miles means and what it will take out of them.

When you set your target you didn't have as much knowledge as you do now. Why hold yourself to a judgement that was made as a best-guess when you now have MORE understanding of yourself at these weights than you did then?

Obviously it's all completely up to you, but SW have a flexible target policy for this very reason.
 
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