CD restart (again)


Hi anyone and everyone! I started CD initially around Feb and lasted probably a few days before completely giving up :( I did however lose just under 4kg in that week which was strange!
Came back on it the start of lockdown and lasted 7 days without cheating then had a slice of pizza and that was it for me! I vowed to restart it but took me about 3 weeks to get back on it... kept telling myself 'I'll do it when I feel motivated, I feel down rn' especially since my mental health isn't really doing well with this lockdown sometimes.
So I've always had a bit of extra weight on me however once I went through a period of depression, severe anxiety and quit my job as a result, I ended up being unemployed for 3-4 months which meant I didn't leave my house much and the weight really piled on there. I have always been someone who avoids looking at the scale because I am not trying to upset myself and I tell myself I don't care etc. knowing deep down I definitely do.. Not being able to shop at normal stores and being that 'bigger' friend is making me feel awful sometimes. I know my potential and I really want to be able to meet that.
This is the first diet I've ever tried and not being at work right now because of covid19 is making it so much harder! I usually eat 1 meal a day and lots of water whilst at my desk but doing it at home is so much harder!
So I'm back on doing a June challenge (already messed up day 1 but I'm moving on from that!) and really hoping to stick to this. Writing on this blog may help so if anyone has any advice on how to stay motivated and really stick to it, please share!
I really am struggling with controlling my urges to eat something whilst I'm bored to keep me busy and that is the hardest. I'm going to be writing updates on here for anyone who wants to join and be like a 'buddy', please do! I feel we all need some support with this as it really makes a difference!
Day 1 and I started off great with some porridge and I have been drinking my water. Got to around 6pm and I had a cup of tea with biscuits and a packet of crisps (well 2).. we go again!!! I'm determined to make this work this time as I don't want to keep messing it up