Charleybarley tries again - Jan 2013

Charley, lovely to see an update and to see you back again
sorry you've had some troubles in the 'relationship department'
hope you've managed to talk them through and sort out a mutual solution

Glad to see you back and well done on getting back to plan. I hope everything works out and you both get through this tough time in your relationship. Best wishes xx

I've lost the plot completely! Fruit cake today... Something strange going on with my tummy too. Get hungry, eat, get pains and yesterday felt really nauseus too. Been going on a couple of weeks. Very strange. Don't want veg or fruit or anything. Blah.

Good to see you back hun :) xxxx

Charley welcome back and lovely to hear from you. I am so glad that you have both decided to stay together. Also glad you are back on the plan straight away. Stay strong my lovely and everything will workout for the best. Big hug

Thank you so much ladies, your messages mean a lot. This is the first massive bump in the road for me, relationship wise. And it has been very testing and I almost walked away, but I know that we will be happier together than apart. He completes me and I complete him. I am a very strong independent person and I never thought I would be put in the position of staying together or walking away, I used to think that women staying with their men regardless of what they have done was a sign of weakness - but actually its strength, fighting for something that you believe in.....at least that's the hope :fingerscrossed:.
 
Tuesday 16th October
So yesterday was ok... until I got in and I had two glasses of red wine:party0036: on a school night too! Terrible terrible terrible.


So today:

B - 2 LMc Rosemary and Red Onion Sausages and half tin of baked beans

L - Chicken with a WM Roll (HEB) (1) for salad cream and Rainbow Salad from M&S (7.5!!!) if I'd have known it was that much I wouldn't have bothered, ay but it is yummilicious!

D - Chilli Con Carne with Rice and Salad (HEA) for grated cheese. EDIT we never had enough boiled rice so I had some Mexican rice as well (1.5)

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Snacks - Half a cantaloupe melon, apple x2, banana.

Water - 2 litres

Syns - 10

Exercise - no exercise in the end, I am so ruddy lazy!
 
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Morning Charley, sorry to hear you and Mick have had some troubles but I'm glad you've sorted things out, and no its not a sign of weakness, you have the strength to work for what you want and know is right.

Well done on getting back on track, not easy to do also thanks for your support.

Take care and have another good SW day x
 
Morning Charley, sorry to hear you and Mick have had some troubles but I'm glad you've sorted things out, and no its not a sign of weakness, you have the strength to work for what you want and know is right.

Well done on getting back on track, not easy to do also thanks for your support.

Take care and have another good SW day x

Thanks for this. I have to say I haven't felt very strong over the last week or so, on the contrary I have felt very powerless, which is a feeling I have never felt before about my everyday life - foodwise I am as weak as a weak thing, but all other aspects of my life, I am strong and confident, in my job and my lovelife - this last week it has taken a tumble. But I have taken time out to lick my wounds and spent hours talking it through - I am drained but I am determined to make us work because we are happy and have been happy for 3 years.

No problem re. your support, like you said on your WLD I know exactly how you feel with the desire/need of food taking over knowing what is best for us. Well done though for maintaining for 6 months - I have never been able to maintain when off the diet, I only able to manage maintaining when I am TRYING to diet!!!!

We will get to that happy place Helen, it seems you are already pretty much there.
 
Wednesday 17th October

Well I have had a catastrophe this morning - yesterday in an effort to steer my want for the ever present office choccies/biccies etc. I bought a big jar of gherkins from Tesco and thought whenever I have the urge to nibble on naughties, I will whip out my gherkins and munch on those. I had a couple yesterday and put the jar in my bottom drawer at work which contains my supplies (spare weighing scales, ryvita minis, space raiders, bran flakes, porridge, ryvitas, mug shots etc.), thinking that "oh its an air tight jar, I will leave it on its side to fit better" I went home. This morning I could smell an overpowering gherkin smell, thinking I had spilled some juice on my desk, I cleaned it - then I opened my drawer - the entire jar had been emptied of its juice in my drawer - everything was saturated with gherkin juice and I have had to chuck my cereals and ryvitas and various other bits and bobs and now my whole desk area stinks despite me cleaning it all up! Here is the offending article:

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NOT A DROP OF JUICE LEFT!
This has caused much hysteria in the office and has led to a number of gherkin led jokes being pinged to me by my colleagues such as:

What do you call a small sweet pickle that wears a vest?
A gherkin in a jerkin

What's green and dry?
Your gherkins

And my favourite -

What's damp and salty?
Your drawers!

These are all from a grown up (not) Lawyer who sits about 10 foot away from me! Luckily for me (and him) I have seen the funny side of it!

So food today:

B - 2 LMc Rosemary and Red Onion Sausages with half tin of beans

L - Leftover Chilli Con Carne on Baked Potato with Salad (1) for salad cream (.5) for butter bud

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D - Spaghetti Carbonara and Tomato and Onion Salad (2.5) for chorizo (HEA) for parmesan/phili light - I go half and half

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Snacks - half a cantaloupe melon, 2x apples, S&V ryvita minis (HEB)

Syns - 4 so far

Water - 2 litres

Exercise: I need to sort out my exercise, I am being very lazy when it comes to this - I walk a lot but I need to incorporate more activity in my day to day life. I have a Bannatyne gym membership, with a gym about 2 min walk from work and another one about a 5 min drive from home - so I really have no other excuse other than the fact that I F'ING HATE EXERCISING!!!! Need to address this issue and, in the words of Nike - JUST DO IT! :character00116::character00115::whacky068:
 
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Charleybarley said:
Thanks for this. I have to say I haven't felt very strong over the last week or so, on the contrary I have felt very powerless, which is a feeling I have never felt before about my everyday life - foodwise I am as weak as a weak thing, but all other aspects of my life, I am strong and confident, in my job and my lovelife - this last week it has taken a tumble. But I have taken time out to lick my wounds and spent hours talking it through - I am drained but I am determined to make us work because we are happy and have been happy for 3 years.

No problem re. your support, like you said on your WLD I know exactly how you feel with the desire/need of food taking over knowing what is best for us. Well done though for maintaining for 6 months - I have never been able to maintain when off the diet, I only able to manage maintaining when I am TRYING to diet!!!!

We will get to that happy place Helen, it seems you are already pretty much there.

The gherkin incident has really made me laugh, sorry it must really stink! I'm really loving the sandwich sliced ones, with pastrami mmm.

As for above you are really strong and with that mentality I'm sure you can make it work if you both want to, and maybe whatever it is has given Mick a bit of a reality check and a kick up the backside.

I am trying to diet (well pretending too!), I've just looked at my book and I'm the same weight as I was in January!!! That's awful.. Got down to my 3 stone loss and then put on 11.5lb on holiday in April.. That's when I found your diary remember?! Now have 6.5lb to get back to it but its literally been off/on off/on for last 6 months.

I know what you said about not beating myself up about it so I figure as long as I don't go back into the 15's and can stay in the 14's then eventually it will start moving again, slowly and happy and enjoying life is better then whizzing along and not.. Isn't it?! Lol

Hope you have a good day today and your desk isn't too stinky! X
 
The gherkin incident has really made me laugh, sorry it must really stink! I'm really loving the sandwich sliced ones, with pastrami mmm.

As for above you are really strong and with that mentality I'm sure you can make it work if you both want to, and maybe whatever it is has given Mick a bit of a reality check and a kick up the backside.

I am trying to diet (well pretending too!), I've just looked at my book and I'm the same weight as I was in January!!! That's awful.. Got down to my 3 stone loss and then put on 11.5lb on holiday in April.. That's when I found your diary remember?! Now have 6.5lb to get back to it but its literally been off/on off/on for last 6 months.

I know what you said about not beating myself up about it so I figure as long as I don't go back into the 15's and can stay in the 14's then eventually it will start moving again, slowly and happy and enjoying life is better then whizzing along and not.. Isn't it?! Lol

Hope you have a good day today and your desk isn't too stinky! X

My drawers are still stinky, but short of getting a new set (I am not sure if the facilities department would go for "can I have a new set of drawers because mine smell like pickled cucumber"!)

I too put 11lbs on when I went on the cruise in February, it was a feeding frenzy for me and I lapped it all up like a Tazmanian Devil! Even when I was gripped with indigestion I still wouldnt stop eating!

I am glad you feel better about yourself, slow and steady wins the race and all that. I think keeping in the 14 zone is wise - you seem so happy and sociable that dieting really shouldn't rule your life, it should fit in with your life.

Have a good day too Helen!
 
Hahaha you don't know how much the line

" my drawers are still stinky " made me howl with laughter

Well, no one likes stinky drawers do they Mumma!
 
Thursday 18th October

Well I have had a pretty crappo day so far. I feel really low today, actually since last night, I have been crying and not wanting to talk to anybody. I am due on so I am hoping it is just temporary PMT type depression and it will pass. I dont usually suffer from noticeable PMT, well I do but it is just a mild seething anger rather than sadness and misery :raincloud:.

I must try and pep up and realise there are those out there much worse off than me and my troubles are zilch in comparison.

Tomorrow will be a happier day - it has to be, I am not a natural pessimist.

So foodage:

B - All Bran Crunch (HEB) with Alpro Hazelnut Milk (HEA) - the milk was a first and was surprisingly creamy, nothing like Kara Coconut, which was what I was expecting.

L - Leftover Chilli with just a salad (1) for salad cream

D - Nandos (1/2 chicken, spicy rice (2.5) and tomato and onion salad with various sauces and dressings. I will give the rest of my syn allowance to this as I love piri piri sauces and lemon and herb and creamy dressings so I will be drowning my chicken, rice, salad and sorrows in lots of sauce.

Syns - Call it 10 but it won't be that much

Water - 2 litres

Exercise - Zilch again.

Snacks - Some ham, 2 apples, half a cantaloupe melon
 
Friday 19th October - WEIGH IN DAY -:scale:

1lb on. It serves me right I suppose. Even though I hadn't been hugely bad I totally cracked under misery-led comfort eating and ate 11 (yes, I said 11) small packs of Space Raiders one after the other at work, they are 3 syns a pop - so 33 syns which, the day before weigh in, isn't great is it? I shouldn't buy multipacks because I have no control over them (or myself). So I will not buy them anymore.

My mood is slightly better today, but really seeing that extra pound this morning would usually make me angry/annoyed/put out - but I just didn't care. Maybe it is the way I am feeling at the moment. I just felt nothing really.

So food today:

B - Porridge (HEB and HEA) tsp syrup (1) and a chopped banana

L - The girls at work in an effort to cheer me up have suggested lunch, they are all looking forward to it and I can't say no. I have no idea what's on the menu but I will try and be good, because tonight's meal is going to be baaaaad
EDIT: well I never caved, I had a piddly prawn and chorizo salad which was both tiny and not at all filling. Why do places call a pile of lettuce leaves a salad??? I got back to the office and ate a whole pack of wafer thin ham!! I also ate two m&s choccies - oops!


D - Fajitas! I have no idea on the syns. They are proper tortillas, no WW or anything like that.

Syns ???????

Water intake - 2 litres

Exercise - Zilch again.
 
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Chin up Charley, I hate hearing you sound so down, you sound a naturally happy person usually, you can get back there, just a bad week, enjoy today, the girls are doing their best to cheer you up so just get straight back on plan tomorrow if you can't make good choices today, enjoy xx
 
Charley, I agree with Helen. You are normally so cheerful. 1 lb is nothing, it will come off easily. I have put on 1 lb too and going out for curry tonight and dinner with my brother tomorrow night. Just enjoy yourself and get back on it straight away. I look at it from the point view that we can't be 100% all the time and from time to time we have to eat like other people - we can do that and then get back on track.

Have a lovely weekend and please cheer up. It is upsetting to hear you being down. xx
 
Thanks Helen and Rosie, I have had a horrible week mood-wise and yes you are both right I am usually very glass is half full. I can only put it down to usually bad PMT mixed with what's been going on at home. We are both trying hard to make things right, I guess things are just getting on top of me. Well hopefully this weekend will cheer me a little. I am going to visit my friends new little bubba and also we are finally making a start on decorating the bedroom and while that fills me with dread actually just me and Mick working together with the radio on chatting and having a laugh - I am actually looking forward to it!

Thank you both for your fab support. Xxx
 
Hey Hun, nothing wrong with getting a bit angry sometimes. It can be very cathartic; even us very nice happy girls can get a bit angry...ggrrrr. I often wonder if I might have had better control over my eating if I'd been more in touch with my feelings and stopped just trying to keep the world (and myself?) happy!!! But I imagine that, like myself, you prefer an even keel, no need to rock the boat, glass half full and confrontation is not our friend :)
Nothing wrong with that. As long as its not to our disadvantage. Hang in there, enjoy the decorating, stay strong and know that we're thinking about you x ((((cyber strength)))

Ps: glass half full.. As if! Fill it to the bloody top, live a little ;-) he he
 
Mumma K said:
Hahaha you don't know how much the line

" my drawers are still stinky " made me howl with laughter

Loooool :) Charley stinky drawers!

In my last job I had a bottle of agave nectar spill and I couldn't get it out, wonder who has my sticky drawers now!

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
 
Bless you Charley ...... You've had a bit of a rough patch hun

you can't be 100% cheerful all the time ..... Pah to that pesky pound
but you'll have that off in a jiffy 'stinky drawers' haha
 
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