Chubby child - advice please!

Discussion in 'Slimming World' started by Beki, 19 October 2008 Social URL.

  1. Beki

    Beki Gold Member

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    I always always ALWAYS said i would never allow my children to become overweight while they were with me (ie; under 16/18 and while i can control what they eat).

    But guess what? It's happened. And i feel terrible :(

    She's not overweight in the proper sense of the word (when i out her weight and height into a child BMI calculator it said she was in the normal range but at risk of becoming overweight), but in the past 6 months she's definitely put on quite a bit, and you can see she's becoming very chubby now.

    I want to nip it in the bud before it becomes out of hand - i certainly don't want her following the same pattern i did!

    The problem is - she's quite a fussy eater, and is always hungry. And i don't want her knowing that i'm worried about her weight as she's always calling herself fat anyway :(

    So i need to get her eating healthier, and less of it (and really cut back on the sweets!!) without her really realising :rolleyes:

    Does anyone have any advice, or have you been in a similar situation? Any meal ideas etc?

    Things she won't eat -

    most veg :(
    lamb, beef, pork
    couscous
    mince

    Things she loves -

    veggie mince
    carrots
    cucumber
    pasta
    rice
    noodles

    Everything else she likes, but isn't her favourite.

    Please help - i so don't want her following in my footsteps, but it's such a sensitive issue to discuss with her, as she already thinks she's huge :cry:

    As for excercise - she does karate every monday for an hour, she mucks out 2 stables most days and brings in a pony and goats and grooms them (not really structured excercise i know, but still moving), she goes on her trampoline for at least half an hour a day - usually more, and she's forever running around with her little brother.

    Hope that gives a clear picture of her daily food/routine etc xxxx
     
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  3. Big an Bouncy

    Big an Bouncy Full Member

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    beki

    Hi Beki,how old is your daughter? she seems to be doing quite a bit of exersize,you know what she should or should not eat so just keep an eye on it.let her eat what she enjoys but watch the portion size.we all know on Sw its choice and portion control.Keep sweets as a treat for the weekend,ask if she will help you do an exersize dvd as you cant do it by yourself,dont let her see you obsess about food etc.The bmi charts have not been very reliable for kids see your gp with her stats by yourself or she will pick up on your concern.Hope that helps,always here if you need a mumsy shoulder! Maz
     
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  4. Treats

    Treats Silver Member

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    Did I miss it... but how old is your daughter?

    Have you tried including her in what you cook... why not let her think of a menu every other night or three times a week.

    My niece who is only 7 sadly doesn't live with me (her mummy passed away:cry:) lives with her grandmother :( only feeds her such rubbish... I get her two/three weeks a year over here and we experiment and she always says.... I don't like that... so I let her cook it...and she loves it.

    Normally it is due to what she has heard others say or how others react to food.

    Make it a fun thing... reward her with other treats... a new hairband or book not food.

    Don't make food an issue... with my daughter when she was young always said she was fat... and she was far from it.. it is how they are made to feel by society... you just have to give her lots of reassurance and be repetitive with it too.

    Also have you actually spoken to her about how you are feeling... about you.. not her...try and let her see you in your shoes if you can.... so you are relating to her and she can try to understand that it isn't important to be skinny just healthy.

    Can you both do a workout together.. tell her you would like her support? You want to do one but don't want to do it alone... that will ensure that you are both working out together.. having fun and toning up...

    Just a few ideas... hope they help... it is all about making her feel good and complete and not thinking she is an outcast... don't battle with her over food as I say.. let her cook for you all and maybe with everyones input on what it was like she will learn to add and take things away.



    gawd rambled again ... sorry




     
  5. Taz

    Taz Spam Hunter

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    Excellent advice from Maz there, I agree that you should not let her see that you aare concerned about her size/weight/food intake. Maybe she could do another karate class every week? As well as the exercise karate is a discipline and will help her in all areas of her life.
     
  6. Beki

    Beki Gold Member

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    Hiya guys - she's 9 now, 10 in february.

    There's some great ideas there girlies. Thanks v much! I hadn't thought of letting her cook - it might make her a bit less fussy!!!

    Will be following through with the excercise etc... Thankees :D xx
     
  7. sazzyness

    sazzyness Member

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    she sounds like an active child, which is obviously good.
    i have the same issue with my daughters fussy eating (however she is very slim somehow)
    i find that helping her cook and bake and create her own food is really good.
    if you help your child cook some new food or perhaps even a family meal and praise her for it, when she see's you eating it she may just join in. she will see what goes into food and know that she has done it.
    experiment with cooking vegetables, let her peel and wash and cook them, make it a bonding thing. she may become comfortable around the foods she dislikes now. and will gain knowledge where it comes to healthy food. explain what all the veg has and how it helps her body, but talk (while cooking) to her as if it is interesting to know. dont tell her as if she has to listen. make it fun.

    she may eventually grow out if it, another option is to not buy alot of sweet stuff, buy healthy snacks (nots so much as in fruit but low fat yoghurt and healthy savoury biscuits ect.)

    good luck hun
     
  8. sonban

    sonban Addicted to Minimins

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    My oldest daughter is 9 she is not over weight but is a very very fussy eater. And if she keeps going to way she is going she will end up over weight as she tends to just want all the baddy foods.

    I have started making my own pizzas, burgers, soups etc from scratch and getting her involved in making it. She tends to want to eat it if she has put the effort into her master piece, lol. She detests veg of any kind but for some strange reason if I do the chopping of the veg and she puts it all in the pan with the water and stock and when boiled she helps blitz it she will eat the veg soup.
     
  9. Treats

    Treats Silver Member

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    Eactly.. as I was saying about my little niece Mercedes...she had never tried cous cous... so we make it a game... we do it as big chef little chef... and we go to the kitchen and make loads of things.. she helps me every day when she is here...

    She got the veg etc and I chopped.. she put it all together stirred it and then I let her taste it to see if it needed a little etc seasoning or lemon etc and she said "I like that Aunty Jacqui" so it worked...

    At the table when someone had said .. I don't like that ... she followed suit.. so I had a rule with everyone.. no one mentions only positive comments about food and how tasty etc it is.. to encourage her to eat healthy.. then when she went back.. every day she was here we did a scrapbook page with photos etc and everything we cooked. So she could say to her grandmother... can we cook this today and there was no excuse as she had the recipe there and Mercedes knows how to cook it!!

    I also showed her how to make muffins too but added lots of blueberrys etc.. so it doesn't always have to be 100% good lol... we all like treats and enjoy them more when we have made them.

    Good luck!
     
  10. Melanie

    Melanie Over half way to target

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    I wouldn't worry too much Beki - she sounds pretty active. You certainly don't want her to see you're concerned, kids are under enough pressure these days to conform to what is considered to be an ideal size. I think the idea about getting her to help paln meals, cook etc is good - she's more likely to eat something she's helped to make. There's no reason at all you couldn't get her on a SW type 'diet' without her realising it, some of the stuff you say she likes would fit in pretty well. Good luck.
     
  11. KD

    KD Gone fishing

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    Getting them to cook is always a good one :)

    I wouldn't restrict sweets myself...just make them less available ;) If you restrict to a certain day of the week, or under certain circumstances, they become a treat. A treat that is often abused later on.

    One great tip that I picked up along the way, was making special occassions either not include food, or to include healthy foods.

    The idea being that we often remember the whole happy process....including the types of foods that went with them.

    So, for instance, if you are having a particularly lovely time with your daughter, perhaps you can eat an apple or other healthy type foods together. Have a fruit picnic, but make it a good one with lots of good atmosphere:cool:

    Do it a few times, and she'll probably get that happy mood when she eats apple and other fruit as her brain will associate the apple with that feel good factor. All to do with the dopamine or something.
     
  12. Melanie

    Melanie Over half way to target

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    Wow! Maybe I need to try the 'happy time' and 'healthy food' association trick myself - will it work for grown ups too???
     
  13. bettylollypop

    bettylollypop soon to be skinny minnie

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    I agree with what everyone else says, why not make things like pasta sauce with tomatoes, peppers carrots and any other veg of your choice and just blend it all up and put it through the pasta. I agree with everyone on don't make an issue out of it though. I also wouldn't restrict sweets either, why not opt for funsize sweets. I give my wee boy haribo low sugar gums, they are great and he loves them.
     
  14. wannabslim

    wannabslim Gold Member

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    Other suggestions to add to those already:

    - make sure that if her fave foods are carby then go for the wholewheat/wholemeal/wholegrain versions so they keep her
    full for longer and she'll be less inclined to snack.

    - if she likes veggie mince, try giving her the meat version. She might not even notice.

    My grandad always tells us this story about when my dad was younger, how he used to refuse to eat lamb, claiming he didnt like it. One day they gave him lamb and told him it was pork, and he didnt even notice. So they told him afterwards and it was never a problem again!! Kids are funny :) xxx
     
  15. janie.com

    janie.com Full Member

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    i've got 2 boys and they eat whatever u put in front of them...........if they pulled their face over food......i would give it the dog and they would have to wait till the next meal.........so they learnt not to be fussy, both are big lads ones 6.5 and the others 6.2 and neither of them have a weight problem..........the only fatty in the house is me.....and i know that because i don't exercise enough for what i use to eat......take your daughter swimming, bike ridin, roller skatin. and swop the sweets for fruit........and the fizzy drink for low cal ones....
    as for what she eats......you need to set the example with healthy eatin, she see's u eatin it and she will follow..........she don't cook u do....so u can make sure what she eats is good for her.......its in your hands........
     
  16. Mrs V

    Mrs V Loves Life!

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    Some fantastic tips and ideas here!
    One thing I do with my little one (she's only 3) is if she says that she doesnt like something then I ask her to try it first in front of me. Most of the time its because she has heard other children say they dont like something.
    She has since discovered broccoli, cauliflower and loves them (still need to work on sprouts!!!) Lol.
     
  17. Beki

    Beki Gold Member

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    Thanks guys! Some really great tips here - the work starts now :D
     
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  19. SpaceAngel

    SpaceAngel I ate my willpower!

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    It sounds a bit like puppy fat to me. She is 9, hormones have kicked in and puberty has started. Some girls stay slim and some get chubby.

    My 7 yr old is very fussy, so I make bolognaise sauce from veggies and blend it.

    You could try getting her involved in the cooking side of food. I read something from somewhere which said that children are more likely to eat new foods if they have prepared and cooked them themselves.

    Maybe take her to buy a cookbook so that you can start cooking together. Annabelle Karmen is ideal, the meals she cooks are designed for children.

    Good luck and I hope your daughter doesn't feel bad.
     
  20. Shelle Belle

    Shelle Belle Full Member

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    Hi Beki

    I really wouldn't worry too much about her weight at her age. You will find that before she starts puberty she will have a growth spurt and will lose a fair bit of her weight anyway. I think the most important this is that she is active and gets plenty of exerise, and it sounds as if she is getting plenty of that. I am sure she will be fine.
     
  21. abigail09

    abigail09 Gold Member

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    its funny was talking about this with my mam yesterday as she was saying she feels like she has made me and my sister overweight down tot eh fact she used to put butter in everything and our treats were chocolate and biscuits. i think the main thing is that kids dont stress over what theyre eating but youve already identified the things she likes in the sw plan so i would say try to base meals around those sorts of things. obv she seems to be doing a lot of exercise already which is great, but doing exercise as a family, going swimming, walking, going to a play park will surely contribute to that. i was never fussy when i was younger and have got fussier and fussier the older ive gotten so dont know what to suggest with regards to trying to get her to eat more variety but usually if kids think other people like something they will tend to like it too, and vice versa so negative reactions to healthy foods by other people cuold mean she therefore doesnt like it
     
  22. ChristinaS

    ChristinaS Full Member

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    Lots of good advice here from everyone. Not sure if age 9 is the time when girls start to naturally pad out a bit anyway. My granddaughter, who stays with me a lot is 9 next month and she has put a little bit of weight on recently - she is big for her age anyway (4ft 8" tall already, with size 4 feet!) and her mum moans that she won't fit in any clothes from the shops like Next and Tammy Girl - she means jeans really, but I think that the clothes for kids these days are designed for the really skinny kids. They don't have sizes like adults, even though all kids vary in size and it does make you feel that the child is getting fat when you have to buy clothes for 12 year olds when they are only 9. But I checked the BMI out for Keira just now (thanks Beki, didn't know one existed) and it said that she is in the normal range for her age, height, etc, so I am going to tell her mum that.

    Just to reassure you all, her mum never says anything in front of Keira, she just worries about it to me.

    We have changed the amount of sweets she eats, without really saying much to her and we take her into fruit shops to buy her own fruit and make fruit salads, which she loves. It is hard though and very worrying, because none of us want our kids/grandkids to suffer from being overweight.
     
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