CelticChick
Member
Ok I went to get a tattoo on Sunday with my sister and her friend. They both went before me and the guys in the shop were laughing and joking with them and flirting etc.. it came to my turn and all I got was, which colour? No talking or laughing through the tattoo or anything. Before we all left the guys came over and again talked to the other two and I was invisable again. It really hurt and got to me, I used to get flirted with like that but now I'm not worth the effort. I came home and I did eat, not too badly but I did. I ate again last night after being good all day and this morning I have already ate all my points
I had a sneaky weigh in on Sunday morning and I was down 8lb already in the 4 days back on plan. Today I am only 4lb down and probably back up the whole 8 tomorrow the way I'm going.
SS is always in the back of my mind, I keep thinking about it and know that when I did manage ten days on it I wasn't miserable but I absolutely hate how my stomach feels on it.
I am 26 and have been this size for about 3 years now, in those 3 years I have cut friends out of my life, become completely inhibited and depressed, stopped going out completely. I'm lonely, miserable and just very sad most of the time. So what the hell is wrong with me?? Why can't I just stick to one plan or the other and come hell or high water just do it?
I'm feeling all hopeless again, the thought of food now is making me sick, when that happens I usually get so hungry by the evening I eat something bad and strong in flavour as its all I can stomach. I want to be thin more than anything in the world, I want to get my life back, I want to look good again and flirt and have relationships and a normal social life.
I am going to councelling, I have all the exercise machines in my house, I have a dog to encourage me to walk, I had gym memberships, I've tried every diet under the sun, I've been hypnotised, tried acupuncture, reiki, personal training etc... and I'm still fat and just getting fatter!! I feel like retreating back into myself completely again.
I just needed to vent, I'm sitting here now and I honestly have no idea what to do or how to do it or whether to just give up and admit defeat completely.
I had a sneaky weigh in on Sunday morning and I was down 8lb already in the 4 days back on plan. Today I am only 4lb down and probably back up the whole 8 tomorrow the way I'm going.
SS is always in the back of my mind, I keep thinking about it and know that when I did manage ten days on it I wasn't miserable but I absolutely hate how my stomach feels on it.
I am 26 and have been this size for about 3 years now, in those 3 years I have cut friends out of my life, become completely inhibited and depressed, stopped going out completely. I'm lonely, miserable and just very sad most of the time. So what the hell is wrong with me?? Why can't I just stick to one plan or the other and come hell or high water just do it?
I'm feeling all hopeless again, the thought of food now is making me sick, when that happens I usually get so hungry by the evening I eat something bad and strong in flavour as its all I can stomach. I want to be thin more than anything in the world, I want to get my life back, I want to look good again and flirt and have relationships and a normal social life.
I am going to councelling, I have all the exercise machines in my house, I have a dog to encourage me to walk, I had gym memberships, I've tried every diet under the sun, I've been hypnotised, tried acupuncture, reiki, personal training etc... and I'm still fat and just getting fatter!! I feel like retreating back into myself completely again.
I just needed to vent, I'm sitting here now and I honestly have no idea what to do or how to do it or whether to just give up and admit defeat completely.