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Cr*ppy, cr*ppy, cr*ppy 2 days!

#1
Hello all, I’ve had a cr*ppy couple of days and just need to put it into words so I hope you’ll bear with me.

Yesterday my mum and eldest daughter went off for a few days in Europe and left at 3am!!!!!! I didn’t sleep much so woke with a headache. I had my pre-op assessment yesterday and 5 mins before I left home my brother-in-law rang to tell me my sister was very poorly and I needed to get up there ASAP. I rushed to hospital and they rushed through the assessment so I could get off. I then rushed to the chemist to get more supplies and the garage to fill up the car and set off.

The traffic was horrible and there were road works most of the way – the M25 was more like a car park than a motorway! I got lost when I got there and thought I’d never find the hospital.

My poor sister looked so poorly and weak. I sat with her all afternoon and evening (though I don’t know if she realised it was me) and we finally left about 8. My brother-in-law took us for a meal (no I didn’t partake!)

I finally had my second shake about midnight! I didn’t bother with a third. We none of us slept more than a few hours last night.

My brother-in-law was called back to the hospital early this morning and my wonderful, much loved, beautiful sister lost her fight not long afterwards!

To make matters worst both my mum and younger sister are abroad and know nothing. I have the unenviable task of telling them when they return. It will be hard enough telling my mum face-to-face but my sister lives 200miles away and I will have to tell her over the phone! My dad lives abroad and we can’t reach him. It is a nightmare!

I drove the 100 miles back home – more traffic jams – and broke the news to my other 2 children, who are understandably heartbroken.

With everything going on I didn’t have my first shake until 4pm today, no idea if I’m going to manage 2 more before bed as I am so exhausted I need an early night so won’t have 4 hours between each one. I know I need all 3 but I really don’t feel like them. I sat at dinner last night while everyone else was eating with my sparkling water and I really wasn’t tempted at all.

OMG but life’s a b*tch sometimes isn’t it!!!!

Sorry for the long post. Thank you for just being here, it has really helped just to write it down.

xx
 
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j-lo_00b

Success leads to success
#2
So sorry to hear that hun, and dont be sorry for writing it down, we are all here for you and its good to let it out. Dont worry about the shakes hun, when your ready you will soon be able to manage all 3 again, please take care and make sure you are keeping hydrated. Big *hugs*. xx
 
#3
Hello,

So very sorry to hear of your loss , and what an awful time youve been having.
We are only a post away!
Im sure you will get back into some sort of routine ,youve got alot on at the moment and things are bound to be upside down.
Big hugs to you.
Sunny xx
 
#4
Thank you both, I am a little numb at the moment, I still can't believe she has gone. She looked so peaceful, like she was asleep. There is still the funeral to get through. I just can't stop crying.

I'm trying to be brave for the children but I just want to sleep. I'm making their tea at the moment but very half-heartedly. Fortunately they are being absolutely wonderful and not whinging for their tea.

I'm so glad you are here, I can't talk to my friends at home without crying, thank you again.

x
 

tafflass

Silver Member
#5
awww hun,i'm so sorry for your loss x
not sure i'd be able to still do LT under these circumstances.
your amazing x
thinking of you x
 
#6
Thank you hun, I did think about stopping myself - last night at dinner, I thought maybe I'd eat coz it had been 11 hours since I'd had my first shake but I really didn't see anything on the menu which I fancied! Decided then not to bother with food and wait till I got back to my sister's house to have my shake. TBH I really think I would have choked if I'd eaten something solid, so the shakes have been a Godsend!

x
 
#8
Oh gosh, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.

It's totally understandable that you're not having all your shakes at this time; just make sure you take care of yourself.

All the best,

Hannah x
 
#9
I`m thinking of you sweetie x

I`m sorry to hear about your sister & I hope you remember to look after yourself so you don`t burn out.

You know where I am if you want to scream

*Huge Hugs*

Xxxxxxx
 
#10
Oh hun...

How awful. I'm so sorry for your loss. I can tell from your posts how important your family is to you....and can only imagine the heartbreak and grief you are going through right now.

I think you are an absolutely amazing woman- to be strong for the rest of your family must take incredible strength. Just make sure you allow yourself to be looked after too.

Things like this put stuff like dieting into perspective...but by sticking at LT you are being incredibly strong and you have my full admiration.

Take care and if you need anything we're all here

Much love

Luce x
 

JanD

maintaining since June'09
#11
Just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your loss **hugs** xx
 

katy73

Silver Member
#12
Oh you made me cry, i dont know what to say, stay strong and just do whatever you need to, so sorry for your loss we are all here for you xxxx
 
#14
I'm so sorry hon, no words I can write would help at a time like this, but just know that you have a whole community here sending you much love and admiration xxx
 

Jeep

Otherwise known as Jools
#15
So so sorry to hear of your loss xxxxxx /hugs /hugs

To be honest even though the shakes are a godsend to you at the moment - dieting must be one of the last things on your mind and everyone would understand if you stopped LT. On the slightly brighter side at least having the shakes, even if only 1 or 2 mean you are getting some nutrients and vitamins that you might not get if you were eating.

bigs hugs and love from us all here

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
 
#16
Thank you, all those kind words have really helped. Today I have already had 2 shakes and will have my 3rd later so I'm back on track. I remember a friend who went through a very traumatic time and wasn't eating and her mum insisted she used LL shakes to make sure she stayed healthy for her 3 children. I knew having mine was the best I could do at the time just wasn't able to fit them inbetween rushing there and being at the hospital.

I am trying to be strong for the children and also to prepare for the ordeal of telling my mum tomorrow, she is going to be beside herself.

Thank you all again.

x
 
#17
aww hun im so sorry to hear of our loss, dont appologise for a long post thats what we`re here for to support each other,
i can`t tell you how much i admire you 4 sticking with lt at this very sad time your an inspiration hun honest..
my thoughts are with you and all your family hun xx take care xx
 

JanD

maintaining since June'09
#18
Hi again ....

I found this - and though I'm sure nothing will make your mum feel better at this time - maybe one day ... ?

Please Don't Cry

Please don't sit round my grave and cry,
I am not there, I did not die.
What makes you think that I would leave?
I'm with you mum, so please don't grieve.
Our bond on earth was much too strong,
Our love will carry on and on...
I'm with you as you go to bed,
I plant sweet kisses on your head.
I'm in the wind, the rain, the snow,
I'm with you everywhere you go.
Please don't cry mum, can't you see?
I'm safe, my spirit soars, I'm free.
 
#19
I am really sorry for your loss, i cant imagine how you must be feeling,
just know tat everyone on the forum wil be here to support you over the next few days and beyond.
take care of yourself.
lots &lots of hugs xxxx
 

Doirin

Positivity is the key
#20
Wishing you all the best for the tough task you have ahead of you tomorrow and the days to come. Take care of yourself and again wishing you all the strength you need to get you through this.
Doirin
 


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