Dating again...

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by reshmus, 9 February 2008 Social URL.

  1. reshmus

    reshmus Member

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    Hello All,
    I know I have been a little MIA lately... primarily because I moved offices and internet connections.. so I have really be limiting my non work web activity ;)

    Here is what I have been upto:

    After being in the UK for almost 4 months, I finally gave in last week and signed up for the online dating thing. I am 25 years old and I am having a real issue meeting people..

    Anyways today was my first date... and it was ok. I don't think I am attracted to him. So that was a shame..
    But this is what I realised.... It was a huge step for me to put myself out there like that and I should really be proud of myself for doing that. Usually, I would cling to any guy who displayed vague interest in my because I believed it was what I could get. but I am actually proud of myself for also being true to myself and realizing that I am probably not attracted to the guy I went out with and the search is still on...


    BUT I also realized, I cannot do anything really with a date that has anything to do with food, except for a coffee date.. which is what this was..

    I made up some elaborate story about not drinking for 100 days because it was a dare.. (seriously, Medically prescribed diet I am assuming would be a HUGE turn off). I also realized that if I did like someone, what would date number 2 be.. It couldn't be a meal..

    Hmm, maybe I should wait on this whole dating thing... I am on week 10 now... I have atleast 2 more months after my 14 days are up... that is a LONG time to wait...

    Oh Also, I met the most gorgeous man on the tube, and we started to talk for a few tube rides... I am sitting at home at 8pm kicking myself for not giving him my number.. but would that even be appropriate..

    Comments, Suggestions. ANYone? Anyone?

    P.s. How you all doin?
     
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  3. lighterlifeclaire

    lighterlifeclaire Silver Member

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    Heyyyyyyy!!!

    Welcome bk btw :) well done on the dating thing, and if u ain't intrested, don't settle for 2nd best (I do tht allllllllll the time)

    ........ by the way ;) u can do one of those posty things in the paper which says something like "i saw u on the tube u were stunnin yadda yadda yadda" ... Oh I wish someone wud do this 4 me!! LOL

    I'd be interested what people say about the date ideas...... I've been stuck with this myself :)
     
  4. reshmus

    reshmus Member

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    :) You know, I look at the paper to see if anyone has posted about me too. HEHE I hope that someone would some day :)
     
  5. Mini

    Mini Administrator Staff Member

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    Hi reshmus,

    I felt that was a very confident post of someone who is taking control of their own life.

    Nothing ventured nothing gained...some men are painfully shy and are only to delighted to have a strong woman proposition them:D

    All he can say is yes/no etc.

    As for the a second date what about going to the movies or the theater, museums, art gallery, window shopping:rolleyes:...when a guy is keen he will go anywhere:)

    Love Mini xxx
     
  6. lighterlifeclaire

    lighterlifeclaire Silver Member

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    Very true!!!!!!! But the kinda guys I go out with :rolleyes: well I could never even imagine inviting them to an art gallery PMSL!!!
     
  7. ladylite

    ladylite Gold Member

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    Great news on your dating the only way is up now:)
     
  8. Isis

    Isis Ancient Egypt Nut!

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    The wise woman above beat me to it Reshmus ;):D

    You sound confident and really thinking about you and your needs. Great to see you tonight..xx
     
  9. Miss Fenella

    Miss Fenella Full Member

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    Hey foxy lady - look at you going on a date!

    Cinema with coffee after.

    Horse riding with coffee.

    Football/sports match.

    Ten pin bowling

    ice skating

    boat trip

    Any of those take your fancy?
     
  10. mustdoit

    mustdoit susan

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    arghhhhhhhhhhhh no horses !! xx
     
  11. Miss Fenella

    Miss Fenella Full Member

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    what's up with horses?
     
  12. mustdoit

    mustdoit susan

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    4 legs ,big teeth, lots of pooh , can't snog on a horse .......................... mind you when i dated on LL could not snog with me halitosis !!!!!
     
  13. x-Katie-x

    x-Katie-x Gold Member

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    Whey Hey Reshmus - brilliant news re the dating. You get yourself out there and you go for it - as posted by Miss F there are loads of things that you can do and not eat/drink --- love your not drinking for a dare line though.

    Okay so you didn't feel overly attracted to the guy today but you will do to one at some point - so keep trying and you never know....

    Re the guy on the tube - have you only met him the once? I just got confused with the 'few tube rides' didn't know if you'd met him a few days on the run or something? And yes you could have gone for it and gave him your number - my brother asked out a girl he once met on a bus and they were together for a good while.

    Got to say that I love the confidence and positivity in your post though - I know that you'll be lucky in love

    xx
     
  14. Miss Fenella

    Miss Fenella Full Member

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    :rotflmao:
     
  15. reshmus

    reshmus Member

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    Thanks all :)

    I really have been feeling a lot more confident and loving myself a lot more lately. :) HUGE change from the pain and self loathing of just a few months ago. :)

    x-Katie-x, I meant to say tube stops, not tube rides. I don't think I will see him again, BUT I next time someone catches my fancy, I am going to go and give them my number... the worse thing they can do is say no.

    Thanks for the suggestions so far. :)

    *HUGE HUGS*
     
  16. x-Katie-x

    x-Katie-x Gold Member

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    Ahhh right - check the paper then or stick an advert in one .... might just be lucky.
     
  17. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    HEy that all sounds good Reshmus!!! GOod on ya for getting out there!!!! I can't think of anything to add tothe good advice you already have received!

    Well done girl!! :D
     
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  19. kimmer

    kimmer Member

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    Well done! The search is worth it.

    Hello Reshmus,

    I just want to say that your post made me smile. I met my fiancé online about two years ago - same as you, after about 4 months in the UK (we'll be married in November).

    I was thinking about the sort of dates we did early on, that didn't involve food - we once met at a little cafe for coffee, had a walk through the park and went to the zoo, which was a great opportunity to chat a bit, and if we ran out of things to say, there were always other people or animals to talk about. In my experience, the men who are genuinely looking for more than a fun night are pleased to meet for a coffee and a chat rather than a long date, since it doesn't commit you to a full evening with someone you might be looking to run away from at your earliest convenience!

    Congratulations on getting out there! The search isn't easy, but it's fun and interesting (the bad dates make great stories) and well worth it.

    Good luck,

    Kimmer
     
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