Step 1 Sole Source + Diary of a serial dieter!

[Silkybaby]

I'm at the beginning of week 4 having had a disaster of a week 3 after 2 weeks of perfection! I have absolutely no idea why I sabotaged myself. I literally came home last week after my WI and started to eat crap and didn't really stop until today!!! I have such a confused relationship with dieting - I was saying to my counsellor today that I feel like I have dieting schizophrenia. On the one hand I'm thinking to myself "we'll done you, those jeans are definitely loser! Won't be long before you can fit in that dress!" and then 2 minutes later I'm in the cupboard ploughing my way thro a cake, packet of biscuits etc. What is my problem - get a grip!!!!!!!!

Anyway back on track today and it will have to be hour by hour at the moment! I think I read somewhere that it takes 4 weeks of doing something before it becomes a habit?

Just a brief back story! Lost 51 lbs with LL in 2008 after my first child, maintained until I got pregnant with my 2nd baby. Started LL 6 weeks after my baby born in 2009 and lost 35lbs. Maintained until last year and then the weight crept on and here we are! Trying Cambridge just for a change and its easier to get to.

Hoping a diary might help, I did one last time.

Let's see what tomorrow holds!

 

[Silkybaby]

DAY 2

Managed day 2 without a slip! Although the worse headache ever which I went to bed with last night and went at about 8 o'clock this evening! When I did LL I never got a headache this bad. Been drinking loads of water and taking nurofen but not touch it! Hopefully tomorrow it will be better!
Husband and MIL had a lovely curry here this evening and we sat and watched masterchef - agony!
Test for ketosis tomorrow and that should give me some encouragement! Quiet week this week so hopefully will find enough to distract me! I find that if I can get to lunchtime without falling off the wagon then I'm usually OK for he rest of the day! I try and have my packs at 4 hr intervals but the gap between 8am and 12pm seems sooooo long! I try and have a little bit of one of my bars at 11 just to keep me going. The problem I seem to have which I feel has caused my weight gain is that I'm such a grazer and crave sweet things! These food packs don't help with the sweet craving , you would think they would do more appetising savoury food packs to try and rub this!

Anyway enough for tonight, lets see wht tomorrow holds?

 

[Kat1991]

Hi

Sometimes i feel like i could just raid all the food in the kitchen, but i just think of how bad i want this and that helps. but when i really want to just eat something i cook myself some scrambled eggs. the one thing i find so hard about this diet is not physically eating something.

I was meant to have my second weigh in yesterday, but my consultant cancelled and moved it today,, after that i wanted to just eat and eat. but then i felt guilty and changed my mind.

its hard though i feel your pain ! :bighug:

xx

 

[Silkybaby]

Hi

Sometimes i feel like i could just raid all the food in the kitchen, but i just think of how bad i want this and that helps. but when i really want to just eat something i cook myself some scrambled eggs. the one thing i find so hard about this diet is not physically eating something.

I was meant to have my second weigh in yesterday, but my consultant cancelled and moved it today,, after that i wanted to just eat and eat. but then i felt guilty and changed my mind.

its hard though i feel your pain ! :bighug:

xx

good luck with WI!

xx

 

[Silkybaby]

Day 6

OK not too bad! Had a bit of a wobble on Saturday and hit the chocolate! Why do I always crave sweet things? Why can't I crave something other than chocolate? It's a quick fix for me - even a shake or soup isn't quick enough! The bars help I suppose but you can only have one a day! One more day until WI and hoping I've done OK! Cooked a lovely roast for my family today and had some but without the carbs!

Its amazing really that when I did LL after my 2 pregnancies I looked at it as such a positive thing but ever since I now look at this as such a negative thing! Having failed to keep the weight off I can't help feeling that I will fail again! Also feel that I let everyone down and when people say how much have you lost I always hear a silent "this time you failure"!!! I hate having to explain to people that I'm starving myself again as I look at it as such a negative experience! I thought being in ketosis gave you a feeling of well being? I also think as Christmas looms nearer and nearer then the temptation will be stronger! Away for New Year as well so plenty of opportunity to fall off the wagon! One of the positives I can draw from this is the fact that I really don't miss alcohol at all and it makes me quite tempted to give it up all together - apart from the odd glass of champagne - my favourite tipple! I use to always wake up with a headache whether I had one glass or a bottle and put that with the amount of sugar I was eating, which I think gave me a sugar hangover, I always felt rubbish in the morning!

Anyway enough complaining from me - let's see what tomorrow brings!

x