Do you think.......

Discussion in 'Cambridge Weight Plan' started by Rayven, 12 March 2009 Social URL.

  1. Rayven

    Rayven Addicted to Minimins!

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    Do you think the way you were brought up with food has effected your bad relationship with food now? (lets face it we all must have a bad relationship with food otherwise we wouldn't be overweight)

    In my house we always had to finish what was on our plates even if we weren't hungry. I'd get the standard lecture about people starving in Africa so i should be grateful i've got nice meals to eat etc. 'I didn't slave away to cook for you just for you not to eat it' .
    I'd always be given HUGE adult sized portions even when in middle school & fruit and veg was an urban myth.

    I'm not blaming my parents in any way but i do feel its effected how i am with food now.

    Anyone else have similar experiences?
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  3. Katycakes

    Katycakes Stubborn tortoise

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    Different, but equally telling I think. My mum never sat down and ate with us, picked at tiny plates 'like a bird' as they say. She was very underweight all of my childhood & still is, only now starting to see this as evidence of problem with food! She regularly burned food or dried it out, and served a lot of stuff like tinned stew, spam & cold meat with spuds, I think she just didn't like it, and portions were small... when a friend came on hols with us when I was 12 she almost starved, and we had to go out on secret raids to the shops to supplement her diet! But her family were eating normal amounts... we were on rations of some sort!!!

    My dad used to add lots of bread etc to his meal, and the one thing that was ALWAYS in plentiful supply was chocolate, sweets and biscuits. You couldn't have 'seconds' of your dinner (there was never any) but you could help yourself to the biscuits. And every trip out was 'rewarded' with a cake, a choc bar, a treat. My mum still has a seriously sweet tooth & deffy passed that on to me. I grew up seeing sweet food as an expression of love - not always forthcoming in other ways.

    Lately, I can see that however messed up my patterns and habits with food were, I need to take responsibilty for them... no use blaming anyone, I chose to 'learn' those habits and use sweet foods to fill a gap that had nothing to do with hunger. Now I have to unlearn them and move on, find healthier ways to be. But looking back at those childhood days... well, it's definitely a part of it all!

    Good thread, Rayven!
  4. Purple Hugs

    Purple Hugs Loves weight.. training!

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    Great topic :) There is a section Called bring your head inside on the main board.. really good for thought provoking topics :)

    Anyway.. getting back to this!

    Yes.. definately.

    Without going down a deep dark lane to tell the story, I suffered physical abuse as a child and my mum would compensate by buying me my 'favourite' foods when the times were good. :( I didn't recognise this honestly till I was 16 and living with my aunt and uncle (again), I was working full time and would come home to food in the fridge that my mum had bought for me.. like a present! I was dieting at the time and she was buying it for me so my aunt made me eat it!

    As a child we had the whole 'africa' argument at boarding school and at home too.. I lost count of the number of times I'd say 'well can I send it to them?' I was being serious. :rolleyes:

    I must be honest and admit that my weight gain was after my mid-teens and helped along with the habits above, depression and drinking to excess... :sigh:

    Then happy eating in my 20's-30's.. here I am today! :wave_cry:

    I still have a lot to do when I get to goal to ensure I don't repeat the cycle, and have had chats with my daughter about my own bad habits too. She seems a lot more knowledgeable than I was at her age about being healthy, so I must be doing something right.. along with schools these days I guess. :)

    Sorry for rambling! lol
  5. Berryred

    Berryred Gold Member

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    My family were always really skinny, even as a child I was aware I was larger than everyone else (not fat but bigger than the rest of my family)

    My sister at 14 was under 7 stone (although only 5ft) my younger sister at 14 was a size 6, when I was 14 I was size 10/12 (see what I am saying size wise) it was always a joke Emma had the fat arse (that what they said!)

    Up until I was 19/20 I was still a size 12 I got married and think I relaxed, I had a hubby who loved me, slowly within 4 months (xmas) I was 11 1/2 st:( I dropped down to 9 1/2 by the april. Then we started trying for a family, the day I got home from hospital I was 12 st! I lost that quickly. (2002)

    Then in 2004 at 11 stone, we started trying for number 2, I was 14 st dead the day I had her. And 4 years on at 14st 8lb I am doing something about it:cry:

    I don;t know, I was always very acitive, but I used to box and dance all night when we went out clubbing. I think I had PND after dd, and hid it, I started eating like I used to when younger, only then I was more active.

    My mum still reminds me to this day finding smash packets in my room:eek:, I used to put to cubes in my mouth and eat through it!! no idea I couldn't face it now, and we only ever had real potatoes at home so not sure where that desire came from lol

    I don;t know, BUT I am now sorting it out, I have had a few blips on cd but only ever put 1/2lb on, I know why that happened and feel in control again.

    I am 29 in April, and I want to be able to enjoy my 30's and beyound not stressing about weigh issues and enjoy doing the things we want to do.
  6. Jambro

    Jambro Full Member

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    I too think alot of my problems with food started as a youngster.
    I come from a family of 4 girls. My dad didn't earn much so meals were always bulked out with bread, potatoes etc.
    Wen were told "eat the meat thats the bit you pay for?"
    Never had sweets, or fruit (only at xmas, birthdays etc)
    So when I was earning my own money thats where it went on junk foods.
    Then more problems with relationships etc blah blah blah....
    I'll save all that for Jeremy Kyle!!
  7. Eileen

    Eileen likes posting.

    Slimming world.
    my sister & i were adopted & we are like chalk & cheese she was always a fussy eater & my mum would use me as a example of good from a early age i learnt it was something i was good at.Then in my 30s i think my big problem started.I lost a baby at 25 weeks & 3 weeks later my oh walked out on me.I went back to my mums but we couldnt get on so i got a place of my own.When i got home from work i would comfort eat& buy takeaways.I felt no one could hurt me if i stayed in & food was my new best friend.I feel like its been a struggle ever since.
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