Don't know why I bother anymore.

[princesskim]

Oh jodie :-( thing is he won't change, u no this... how many months now have you gone through this honestly.... I no of 5 months for defo and no things weren't great before then. Problem is he hates nagging and being spoken down to and u don't like him not helping so u nag and moan. I understand y ur frustrated with him its like talking to a brick wall half the time and his 'interests' are more important than saving his relationship bit I do no money wise he's trying. You need to stop making excuses and just ask yourself if u deserve better, you have grown up over the last 4 years and I no that.... has he? Is it you who's changed towards him....? He's a good bloke deep down but his morals r different to yours, I hope he does change cuz I do like him.. maybe its time to spend time TOGETHER! its got to change jodin I love ya Xxxx

 

[Bunnylush]

I know I'm old now,when I'm dishing out advice I ignored in my 20's xxxx

 

[fillymum]

To be quite honest guys, i'm not sure now what I still see in him. He does make me laugh but that doesn't override the fact that he's lazy and abusive.

X

If you want a laugh buy a comic book...... much safer

 

[AnnaFaraday]

I was going to chip in with my views, then found that Fillymum and Kingleds had expressed what I was going to say so much better than I would have done!

Try reading your posts as if they were written by someone else. What advice would you be giving them? Right!

 

[kingleds]

Things will be ok, I've told u a thousand times what I think.. things won't change unless u make them. Xx

You should also be listening to your friend here. She obviously knows you personally (instead of how we all 'know' each other on here), and she is completely right. YOU need to change things. He has no incentive to do so whilst you continue to let him get away with sitting on his ar"e all day doing nothing.

 

[speccyblue]

I went out with someone like that and the relief when I dumped him overwhelmed me. I thought I loved him but I was just scared of being alone. Send him to Dumpsville and enjoy your life. We're aren't here to be miserable.

 

[Shirleen]

You are in a very dangerous relationship. I'm guessing you are both fairly young, nothing wrong in that only he has never grown up!
He doesn't know what it is to be alone and responsible.
You've been together 4 years and he is behaving like a toddler.
I'm afraid this is not a relationship, not an adult one anyway.
You have become the mother figure and he is never going to see you any other way now.
His behaviour WILL escalate, you haven't said but I'm guessing can be verbally abusive too.
For your safety I would urge you to put some distance between you, it needn't necessarily be permanent but he needs to cool off and realise the relationship is not without boundaries, and you need to evaluate whether this man is worth it.

Because in a few years when you're holding the baby and he raises his fist you won't be able to break free so easily.

One other thing, in my first hand experience men who like to beat and intimidate their partners are really really keen on 'forgiving sex'. You know when they cry and beg you and then want to be close.
This is dangerous, because they begin to equate the violence or threat of violence and then the remorse and the emotional sex as all one thing, the day you don't give in so easily will be very unpleasant.

 

[princesskim]

You are very mother like with him tbh.... but he depends on that I think and a lot to do with his past probably, you seemed a bit happier earlier as well no your at mine now but I'm not there :-( ill see you tomorrow for WI. We will discuss in the car lol x x