Failing badly!!!!

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by Fatty_no_more, 28 November 2007 Social URL.

  1. Fatty_no_more

    Fatty_no_more Slimming for my children

    Slimming world
    Hi all.
    I have come here as i need advice help opinions or whatever.
    Basically I am on my last day of foundation tonight. I actually am only day 90 but i started late. But by the by. I havent lost my 3 stone as me being me, i havent stuck to it.
    But last week i was put on steroids to try and shrink a benign brain tumor that i have that is pressing on my optic nerve and i was told iw ould put on weight. That was it, i thought in my head well i may as well eat as i will be putting on weight anyway! So every day since. I have eaten everything i can see.
    I dont want to go tonight and face the music as i know what she will say. And i am petrified into going into developers now having not lost the 3 stone as they will just see me as a failure and probably outcast me ( i am assuming this as i havent met them but i know they have all stuck to it religiously).
    I really dont know what to do. I want to give up.
    She mentioned to the other girls last week about going in refreshers but even if i wanted to go, i couldnt as i wouldnt be able to get there on time.

    dunno what i am asking but i am petrified really to be honest! and to top it all i have a stinking headahce!
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  3. mandye

    mandye Silver Member

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    omg you need to think about yourself right now not what everyone else thinks .Put your diet on hold try to eat good foods get yourself back to a place where you are happy and settled then rethink your diet xxx keep posting peeps are here for you
  4. DaveP

    DaveP Full Member

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    Lighter Life
    Why not redo foundation?
  5. Dancing

    Dancing Gold Member

    not surprised you have a headache what with the optic tumour and on steroids. This is a tough one FNM. You are going through something that is really challenging to you. There are two ways of looking at it and neither one is right or wrong it is just what works best for you. Please stop being hard on yourself and comparing yourself to others. You are you and you are going through what you are going through - noone else is.

    Think about how you would feel if you read this of someone else on here. You wouldn't be hard on them would you? So please don't be hard on yourself.

    Now, you can either go onto Development (or find another refreshers course that you can get to) and just do what you have to do for you. This is about you and not about the others in the group. You can openly discuss the challenges you have had and how you have dealt with things and let the group and the counsellor play their roles. This is not about being perfect continually. This is about learning what each of us has to learn in order to achieve our goals. You may find you are helping someone else in the process of discussing your issues. No one will judge you, and if they do, they aren't worth the time of day.

    The other option is to give yourself a break until you feel mentally able to cope and/or you are off the steroids. It will make your journey more difficult being on steroids as I can imagine it will have all sorts of effects on things. Maybe give head office medical team a call and ask if they know of anyone else who has been on steroids and ask the team what they recommend?

    Wish I could offer more advise but I do want to stress that you be nice to yourself
  6. Fatty_no_more

    Fatty_no_more Slimming for my children

    Slimming world
    Hi thanks for that.
    Re:- Dave i dont want to re do foundation as i have learnt what i would re learn in foundation and i want to learn more.
    Plus in regards to the refreshers course i absolutly love my councillor and wouldnt feel right going anywhere else.

    I feel like crying at the moment and have text my counciller telling her about this weeks crap. Also on top of other things its minor really... but my car gear box went and we cant afford to fix it....resulting no car. My freezer broke and also we had a massive leak in the bathroom where a pipe burst and we were two days without water.

    The thing is i hate telling people about my tumor as its nothing as serious as cancer and also when i told someone ages ago they laughed in my face so i tend to keep it inside as i dont want people disbelieveing me? I havent cried yet in the meetings as i find it very hard to but a few weeks back my dad had a stroke and i was in amsterdam and couldnt get to him and i cried and i cried and i cried and now i am scared i will cry in class and they will think i am stupid cos it was only the week before amsterdam that i had said i hadnt cried in 4 years since my dad had has brain heomorrage.

    Feels good to let it all out to a bunch of strangers tho weirdly enough?
  7. Dancing

    Dancing Gold Member

    - yep psychiatry by proxy on this website. They always say talking to strangers helps. So let it out!

    it is good you have texted your counsellor. Hope she responds well, which I'm sure she will as you speak so highly of her.
  8. Deb G

    Deb G Silver Member

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    I can't see the people in developers being mean - afterall, we've all struggled with the diet at some point!!! I would go, face the music (its not like they're going to beat up you!) and accept that your thoughts were all haywire, and work towards getting yourself back on track. If you find thought records helpful, then use them.

    I'd also give your counsellor a ring first, tell him/her what has happened and how you reacted,and explain how you feel. Then, when you get there you don't feel you have to 'confess' and he/she will know how to react to you without doing anything to upset you.

    The good things abour wagons, is that you CAN get back on them, and we've ALL fallen off at some time!
  9. Fatty_no_more

    Fatty_no_more Slimming for my children

    Slimming world
    yes i know she will. Knowing her she will call.
    She is so so lovely and i couldnt have got this far without her. Shes the one that held the lighterlife party for all her clients. it was fab!

    Kind of worried she will call as i am at work and feel like crying as it is so kind of dont want to talk about it?
  10. Fatty_no_more

    Fatty_no_more Slimming for my children

    Slimming world
    forgot to add i am on my monthlys too! What a week i tell you!
  11. Tiger Girl

    Tiger Girl Full Member

    FNM :)

    Firstly, noone will think you're a failure or stupid. Noone. Putting aside the medical stuff you are facing right now (I couldn't offer any advice on this other than to reiterate whats already been said), anyone who has been through Foundation and goes into Development knows that there are just so many issues that come up. Things that have been buried deeply for years in some cases. And the emotional rollercoaster is just unreal. So much changes for people. My LLC and I have spoken about the amount of clients she's had who go through life altering change - ending relationships and major job moves seemingly being the top 2 things she's noticed.
    Your LLC sounds amazing, so I say cry and cry and cry!! It sounds like you're having a huge week on the emotional front. And clearly as everything has gone straight to a 10, you've gone straight to food central. As one of our very wise Mini's once said "there will never be enough food in the world to make me feel better right now", and it's so true.
    Keep posting and let us know how it all works out.
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