single+2angel
Full Member
Afternoon all,
I have a few minutes to post today, the last couple of days been hectic.
I am here to moan a bit, feel free not to reply but I just have to get it out of my system.
Before LT I went through different diets, like other people changing their underwear. I lost some weight than put it back, than put on some more. Over the years I ballooned up.
I always showed other people I am happy: I don't care about my weight; I put on a happy face.
To tell you the truth at home when I looked into the mirror I saw a fat blob, but did not really bothered to do something about it, because I saw this as THIS IS ME. This fat woman IS me. That's it. I stopped caring about my weight and surprisingly I stopped putting on weight. I stopped at 97 kg and maintained it for nearly 15 months.
BUT..
Now I am losing weight with LT and slowly-slowly I can get into my 32' Diesel jeans. Didn't wear that size the last 12 years.
Anyways... The last couple of days I am obsessed with the way I look. I am going to my bedroom umpteen times a day to see myself. If I going out, all the car windows I pass, I am looking into them if any flab on top of my jeans is out, is my bra too tight....etc....?
I never worried about how I looked like before LT. Sometimes I had gone days without seeing myself in the mirror. Now I feel I am still so fat ,(more fat than I was before-does it make any sense?????)
I know I losing weight but feel I need to lose more and more and more)
I don't like it!!!
It's like something inside pushing me to loose more and more.
What if I will not be able to stop LT? I fear from re-feed (way down the line, not yet) from maintenance, portion control...Etc... I DO NOT WANT TO BE FAT AGAIN…..
I was so comfortable being big sized(maybe because I thought I will never be able to change it), but now I feel the NEED to get new clothes, do my hair, maybe some make-up. I stressing out on all the little things, it’s unbelievable.
Don’t get me wrong, I love the new me, I love the compliments and to be able to fit into clothes I never imagined I could wear before.
I know I am getting healthier for myself and for my children. But I don’t like what is starting to be some kind of obsession. I need some kind of help because I think I am going mental. LOL
Sorry for the long rant, if you made it to the end…
If you have anything to say please add your comment, suggestions.
Thank you for reading it.
X:family2:
I have a few minutes to post today, the last couple of days been hectic.
I am here to moan a bit, feel free not to reply but I just have to get it out of my system.
Before LT I went through different diets, like other people changing their underwear. I lost some weight than put it back, than put on some more. Over the years I ballooned up.
I always showed other people I am happy: I don't care about my weight; I put on a happy face.
To tell you the truth at home when I looked into the mirror I saw a fat blob, but did not really bothered to do something about it, because I saw this as THIS IS ME. This fat woman IS me. That's it. I stopped caring about my weight and surprisingly I stopped putting on weight. I stopped at 97 kg and maintained it for nearly 15 months.
BUT..
Now I am losing weight with LT and slowly-slowly I can get into my 32' Diesel jeans. Didn't wear that size the last 12 years.
Anyways... The last couple of days I am obsessed with the way I look. I am going to my bedroom umpteen times a day to see myself. If I going out, all the car windows I pass, I am looking into them if any flab on top of my jeans is out, is my bra too tight....etc....?
I never worried about how I looked like before LT. Sometimes I had gone days without seeing myself in the mirror. Now I feel I am still so fat ,(more fat than I was before-does it make any sense?????)
I know I losing weight but feel I need to lose more and more and more)
I don't like it!!!
It's like something inside pushing me to loose more and more.
What if I will not be able to stop LT? I fear from re-feed (way down the line, not yet) from maintenance, portion control...Etc... I DO NOT WANT TO BE FAT AGAIN…..
I was so comfortable being big sized(maybe because I thought I will never be able to change it), but now I feel the NEED to get new clothes, do my hair, maybe some make-up. I stressing out on all the little things, it’s unbelievable.
Don’t get me wrong, I love the new me, I love the compliments and to be able to fit into clothes I never imagined I could wear before.
I know I am getting healthier for myself and for my children. But I don’t like what is starting to be some kind of obsession. I need some kind of help because I think I am going mental. LOL
Sorry for the long rant, if you made it to the end…
If you have anything to say please add your comment, suggestions.
Thank you for reading it.
X:family2: