Feeling sad :(

[bevlier]

On Day 3, doing the 810 as not allowed to do SS yet until BMI under 40. Got some awful news yesterday, my best friend's dad has bowel cancer which they've now discovered has spread and is inoperable. My friend is obviously devastated and I feel helpless to help him. Trouble is, it's times like this that I think oh to hell with it, so what if I'm big, what does it matter compared to something like this? Then I go back to square one. In fact, the second last time I tried LighterLife, I gave up after a couple of weeks because this same friend and his (now) wife had a miscarriage and we were all really upset so of course I stuffed my face!! I'm trying really hard to not do this today but it's a struggle. And I feel guilty for obsessing about my weight when my friend's lovely daddy is going to die. He's only in his 60s. Oh great, crying again now. Please someone say something nice to me. Thanks.

 

[Suseka]

What awful news, so of course you're upset - big hugs to you and your friend :hug99:life is such a ***** sometimes.

Try not to let this steer you off course though. You can still be there for your friend and his wife and provide them with the emotional support they need right now -without giving up on what you've already started.

You are obviously a very caring person - so also care for yourself too. You need to think about why you started this in the first place and focus on that, as much as anything else.

I hope you have family who can help you with your feelings and support you through what will undoubtedly be a very tough time.

 

[bevlier]

Aw thank you Suseka
Yes I have a lovely husband and 2 wonderful daughters, one is almost 13 and the other is 10 and a half. They are my world and the main reason I'm losing this weight is so that I can be a better wife and mum. I'd love to say I'm doing it for myself but I'm not really bothered about myself tbh. I'm hoping that once I climb out of this cocoon of fat that I've hidden away in for so long, maybe I'll like the person who emerges. I know I must sound like a right miserable cow but I'm not really I have a lovely family and great friends and I'm a really upbeat fun-loving person when I'm with others - it's just when I'm on my own I'm not very good. Never liked my own company.
You're so right, I have to focus on my goals and the fact that I need to take better care of my daughters' mummy
We're going on holiday 24 weeks on Sunday - not that I'm counting or anything - and I'd love to be a size 18 (or smaller!!) by then - I'm a size 24 now. So I just have to keep at it and very importantly keep coming on here for support from other lovely ladies who know what I'm going thru - cos with the best will in the world, my slim husband hasn't got a clue!
Thanks again Suseka x

 

[Suseka]

You're welcome hun - nice to see you're a little more upbeat now. Sounds like a lovely family and it doesn't really matter if, at the moment, you feel you're doing this more for them, than you - as long as you have something motivating you.

Doing a vlcd is one of the hardest ways of losing weight - but it does give you the results, and quickly (in comparison to others). So you will definitely drop quite a few dress sizes over the next 24 weeks and can look forward to being a much slimmer you, for your holiday.

This is a great forum for support, so my advice is to keep posting - especially if you find yourself heading off track. Or even just if you fancy a natter

 

[spangles]

24 weeks, you say? Well it just so happens that I've been on this diet for 24 weeks and I have lost six stone exactly! And I dint have especially great losses. Size loss varies, but I also started at a 24 and am now a 16 (14 in some shops!)

Imagine yourself on your holiday, 6 stone lighter. Because it's completely do-able if you get your head down, and stick to this diet like glue.

 

[bevlier]

thanks spangles can i just say that I really admire you? your before and after photos are so inspiring, as is your steely determination - 24 weeks with not the teeniest blip is just awesome. i know from reading your diary (gosh that sounds awful! like i broke into your house and rifled thru your belongings! lol) that you have a brilliant motivation to get to a healthy BMI and I'm sure that's what's keeping you so strong. I'm "only" doing this for me and I haven't quite yet got into the mindset that I'm worth the effort I think. but despite the mini meltdown I had at the weekend, I am determined now - having chewed my consultant's ear off for 45 minutes this morning, the poor dear - to stick to this 100% until 22 weeks on Sunday I would dearly love to be able to say, hand on heart, yeah no probs, I'll defo do it and defo be 5 stone lighter by then, but I need to believe it first and I still don't trust myself enough. my husband really wants me to do it this time - God love him, he normally takes no notice but I think he's had enough now and just wants me to get rid of this weight once and for all, and my 2 daughters (13 and nearly 11) just want their mum to be healthy and happy

 

[spangles]

i think the thing was that i never really expected the diet to work - it was so extreme and my track record with diets was so poor... and then after a couple of weeks it had been possible to stick to it. and from that moment i knew that if i kept doing what i had been doing so far, then i would succeed all the way to goal.

so that was the key. take the successful period and do exactly the same thing over and over again. which is why i don't deviate, i don't cheat and i don't have breaks: because sticking to the diet is a known quantity. all i have to do is keep doing it. at any point, i can say: if i made it this far, i can do that today as well.