Further to being more assertive...

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by Blonde Logic, 8 October 2009 Social URL.

  1. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Well, ya know we recently spoke here about how LL has given us the confidence to be more assertive? Well, today I used some of that....and earned myself the nickname "Rocky" at work. lol Not sure why Rocky - I guess the ladies said I fought for the underdog and was therefore dubbed.

    ANyway - where we eat lunch, two men from the adjoining building eat lunch there every day as well, and a third who distances himself from the groups always.

    But when he comes out, he ALWAYS makes a very mean comment to one of the men, with the sole purpose of embrassing him and humiliating him in front of us ladies.

    This man is opiniontated, brash, old and unnattractive. He is ugly inside.

    THese other two men are, odd. They are by no mens ladies men - both single, and I imagine always have been. Without sounding mean - they were not blessed with good genes, to say the least. But both, are kind, shy, quiet, and friendly - doubt they would ever hurt a fly.

    Well, I have had enough of this bullys attempts to embrarass.

    TOday, us ladies were having a good old laugh - much more then we ever have before. The man came out from his corner and said, "So, what are all you ladies laughing about - is so and so (referring to one of the nice men) sat here naked? Figure anyone laughing THAT loud would have to be looking at his naked body."

    Funny? Nope. And I caught a glimpse of the mans face - you could see the hurt, embarassment and sheer helplessness written all over it.

    So - leave it to me.

    I said, "Actually, we have been talking about YOU. ANd I might tell you, it's been a very small conversation." <wink wink nudge nudge>

    THe room fell deathly silent - He said "oh" and then went dead silent. Had no come back. None of his witty (mean-spirited) retorts. He said not one word - gathered his gear, and left the room.

    The man he tried to embarass, had his head bowed, but I could see a grin the size of texas on his face....and that made my day.

    I stuned even myself I must admit, and worried afterward that it was mean to say what I said - but I was so sick of seeing him hurt by this man, its every single day, and since he obviously cannot defend himself, I did it for him. :D

    So - that me now - the work fighter for the underdogs....the bully slayer. :D

    Wil be interesting to see how the bully acts tomorrow. When he came to collect our mail, he looked at me, and then quickly looked away. LOL SO maybe he has been silenced.

    I do feel kind of bad, but not as bad as I have felt for the other man for months. :)

    I would never have had the confidence to say that before as I would have been terrified at whatever he would have fired back at me. But ya know what - it felt good to make the other one feel that he had others on his side, and that we all were on his side, and that we have always seen right through the others comments.

    Was good. :)
     
    Last edited: 8 October 2009
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  3. thin_inside

    thin_inside I Can Do This!

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    Mix a splash of LL with a great dollop of personality. Here's our BL - Rocky - protector of the underdog!!!

    Go Girl! xx
     
  4. thin_inside

    thin_inside I Can Do This!

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    That chap sounds positively mean and small minded. What we look like shouldn't matter, it's what's inside that's important.

    As I emerge from my thick coat of flab I see people responding to me differently. But I haven't changed inside. I am now more aware of how I treat others and try not to jump to an opinion of someone based purely on their looks.

    xx
     
  5. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Hey TI. I know what you mean.

    I just could'nt stand it any longer. His daily comments were becoming cringeworthy - and just so out of order. I know what its like to be the butt of a joke and unable to speak up, and just wanting to dissappear and desperately wanting the comments to stop. And I could see the man feeling all those things, every single day. I just couldn;t watch it any longer.

    Why does a grown man feel the need to bully someone?? Good god - don;t they ever outgrow it?

    I sort of wish I had not done what I did, but on the other hand, I am glad I did. Someone had too. I just hope it dowsnt make it awkward now. Ya know?

    Guess we'll see tomorrow. :)

    I blamed it on my pain meds. lol ; )

    xx
     
  6. daisydoll

    daisydoll Gold Member

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    go girl!!!!
    nice one BL
    daisy x
     
  7. slendablenda

    slendablenda Gold Member

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    Good for you Rocky.

    Glad you are back on form. i'm surprised you let it ride for so long.
    I bet you are that man's heroine tonight.
     
  8. Strawberri

    Strawberri Mad As A Hatter

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    Nope unfortunetly men's brains dont grow beyond puberty so they spend most of their adult life a 16 year old boy trapped in a mans body... :sigh:

    Good for you, dont feel bad ffor making someone elses life just a lil bit better

    Berri xx
     
  9. LaydeeBug

    LaydeeBug Full Member

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    Well done BL ~ I would have done exactly the same, and even whilst overweight. I have always been a fighter for the underdog, right from school, and still am.

    Don't feel bad about what you said ~ he had a taste of his own medicine, and hopefully might think twice before berating others in future.

    Miserable old so n' so!
     
  10. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    THanks peeps. :) I don;t regret it - but still it doesnt feel nice being nasty, even if one deserves it. But - it feels better then seeeing him hurt this fella every day!

    Laydee - I was like that too - I always befriended the ones in school the others shunned because I felt so sorry for them. But it wasnt out of pity - if you know what I mean. It made for a wonderfully eclectic circle of friends. :)
     
  11. Foxtrot

    Foxtrot Is back in the saddle!

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    Well done BL. What probably scared him the most was the fact that you looked as though your were saying it for everybody. I'm sure all eyes were on him at the time. I hope it may have made him think about his actions and, if it has, I wonder how long it will last before he starts again even on someone else.
     
  12. Sean(JSF)

    Sean(JSF) Making it all add up

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    16yr olds ??? Many of us never get past 12!!!

    Nice one BL :)
     
  13. LaydeeBug

    LaydeeBug Full Member

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    BL ~ I know what you mean about the wide circle of friends.

    I am still amazed now when I am asked in my village, are you so and so? From that school?
    People remember you for being the one who befriended everyone.

    I lived abroad on and off for 10 years, so I am shocked when people remember me from school. :)
     
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