How To Shower Like a Woman

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Mini, 1 December 2006 Social URL.

  1. Mini

    Mini Administrator Staff Member

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    How To Shower Like a Woman:


    Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

    Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

    If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

    Look at your womanly physique in the mirror make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc. etc.

    Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone

    Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

    Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

    Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

    Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

    Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffra cake body wash

    Rinse conditioner off hair

    Shave armpits and legs.

    Turn off shower.

    Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

    Get out of shower.

    Dry with towel the size of a small country.

    Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

    Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

    If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.





    How To Shower Like a Man:

    Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

    Walk naked to the bathroom.

    If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

    Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

    Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.

    Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.

    Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

    Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

    Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

    Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

    Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

    Pee in the shower.

    Rinse off and get out of shower.

    Partially dry off.

    Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

    Admire wiener size in mirror again.

    Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

    Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

    If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo' sound again.

    Throw wet towel on bed.


    If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something so very wrong with you.

    Have a great day! And, "woo woo"!!!
     
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  3. Isobel1965

    Isobel1965 Gold Member

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    Ah you've met my ex-husband then!!

    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
     
  4. wannabeminime

    wannabeminime Gold Member

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    Very funny!!!
     
  5. MadamDotty

    MadamDotty Back again!

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    ROFPMSL - funny, funny, funny - and so true!!!!!
     
  6. punkass

    punkass Silver Member

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    Why do men throw wet towels on the bed?! Has always had me puzzled.. i mean why do they need to actually take the towel out of the bathroom in the first place?!

    *remembers happily why she is single*
     
  7. magickmel

    magickmel Loves VLCD's !

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    Yes SO true, especially the wet towels on the bed, on my side that is, not his !
     
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