Husband Issues

[staceyc]

Due to a number of factors (Husband nagging, wanting to be able to wear what I want, PCOS and trying for a baby). I thought I'd give the Cambridge Diet a go as a last ditch attempt to lose weight. I'd tried everything else and nothing had worked.

I had a planned week off at the start of October and despite normal food, I only put on a pound. Husband wasn't too bad, but he was surrounded by my family in a foreign country.

The weekend just gone ended up being half Cambridge and half food, he tolerated it, but I could tell he wasn't happy about it. We were away for a weekend and as it was just the two of us and he was eating I found it too difficult to keep to plan.

Last night as I knew I wouldn't be in ketosis, I had food at my Dad's bonfire party. I didn't overeat but I did extend the break by a day to have food.

I had a a second small sausage and he was overheard using a telling off voice asking me "how many of those are you planning on having?". Later I was toasting marshmallows over a fire for the kids and he had a go at me before even checking the facts. He made me feel awful and despite frequent attempts to get him to understand how what he says and how he says it affect me, he refuses to understand.

What probably makes it harder is that he comes from a lean family, and he can eat what he likes without it affecting him.

 

[Lily]

Due to a number of factors (Husband nagging, wanting to be able to wear what I want, PCOS and trying for a baby). I thought I'd give the Cambridge Diet a go as a last ditch attempt to lose weight. I'd tried everything else and nothing had worked.

I had a planned week off at the start of October and despite normal food, I only put on a pound. Husband wasn't too bad, but he was surrounded by my family in a foreign country.

The weekend just gone ended up being half Cambridge and half food, he tolerated it, but I could tell he wasn't happy about it. We were away for a weekend and as it was just the two of us and he was eating I found it too difficult to keep to plan.

Last night as I knew I wouldn't be in ketosis, I had food at my Dad's bonfire party. I didn't overeat but I did extend the break by a day to have food.

I had a a second small sausage and he was overheard using a telling off voice asking me "how many of those are you planning on having?". Later I was toasting marshmallows over a fire for the kids and he had a go at me before even checking the facts. He made me feel awful and despite frequent attempts to get him to understand how what he says and how he says it affect me, he refuses to understand.

What probably makes it harder is that he comes from a lean family, and he can eat what he likes without it affecting him.

Interesting. He's got some issues, hasn't he?

First of all, have a really big hug. :bighug:

Believe it or not, I think he's trying to sabotage you. It sounds like he's used your weight as a stick to beat you with for a while - because it works, doesn't it? It really winds you up when he has a go at you about your extra pounds, doesn't it? Which means he gets to have all the power in a conversation about food. He makes you feel cr*p, you've traditionally used food to cheer yourself up (at least, if you're like most of the rest of us here you do!) so it's a vicious circle because once he's made you feel cr*p you'll reach for food.

Don't play the game, Stacey. It sounds like you've probably told him before not to be mean to you about what you eat but he's clearly not getting it. So, in the way you deal with bullies in the playground, don't rise to the bait. Now, don't misunderstand, I'm not saying your hubby's a bully (that's only for you to know) but maybe he senses that the status quo is about to shift. A slimmer you may well become a much more assertive, outgoing you - and maybe he doesn't like that idea, cos he wants to keep you the way you are.

How are you doing with Cambridge? Is it the diet for you or would you be better off picking a plan that let's you eat real food? Cambridge is a really tough diet to do without the support of your family. I've always said that to do Cambridge, you have to be more selfish than you've ever been before. You have to put your needs ahead of everybody else's (that often doesn't go down well with folks who are used to you putting their needs first). You have to demand that you're allowed to have your Cambridge products and nothing more, that you won't be guilted into joining in with 'special occasions' (and there will always be some of those, no matter when you start a VLCD). Are you in a position to be that selfish? You can do this, with or without support, but support really really helps!

Well done on only putting on a pound after your holiday! That was really good! :clap: