I am losing my partner through weight gain...

[jackdaniels]

I put on two and a half stone between the Feb and May this year (I know what you are thinking how on earth did I do that? ...by eating junk throughout the day every day!) It's my own fault I know but one day lead to the next, to the next until I couldn't break the habit and I still can't.

I have a partner who i'm in a long distance relationship with. He doesn't know about the weight gain and I haven't let him see me since February (I keep making excuses) although they are now waring thin and he has made a couple of comments about how if we haven't met up next month we should call it a day.

It isn't an option to see him as I am now, I look and feel fat in whatever I wear. I don't feel comfortable or confident.

I know this diet works but sticking to it is another matter.

I guess I would just like a bit of support and tips on how to stick to it....my struggling point each day is from the minute I get in from work (literally!) until when I go to bed. I don't live on my own so there is food around the house which doesn't help and if I go up to bed early I feel like i'm being anti-social!!

Thanks for reading x

 

[RuthG]

What step are you on? Can you step up to include/increase the food amount?

 

[Phoenyx]

In my personal and not hugely knowledgable opinion, can I suggest 2 things?

1. What would you recommend to a friend in your position? We nearly always give better advice to friends than ourselves as we tend to be kinder to them!

2. I personally don't think you'll be able to deal with the weight effectively unless you come clean to him. Don't let your low self esteem make decisions for you and be the cause of the end of a relationship, unless that's actually what you want. Bite the bullet and tell him. Ask for his support. He may be relieved to know it's not him (coz that's what I'd be thinking if you were avoiding me), and what's the worst that can happen? He says I'm not going out with a Fattie and dumps you? Same ending as you get if you just avoid him. Except no regrets to live with. Anyway, Does that sound like something he'd say? What would you say if the roles were reversed and he confessed to gaining 2.5 stone?

on another note, don't be ashamed of gaining that much weight in a shortish space of time. You're not alone there...

very good luck whatever you do xxxx

 

[Phoenyx]

Oh and as for tips, only this - get your mind in the right place, it's not about motivation and willpower for me, it's about determination and aggression. But since I'm only on day 2, perhaps I'd best not give advice!