I don't know what to do!!!

[Caz]

My mum just came in and asked whether I'll be sticking to my diet tomorrow evening. It's my sisters birthday and she's apparently doing a birthday dinner. Dinner is usually a low key affair in our house, we don't all sit together and eat it or anything. But tomorrow we are, apparently. She's cooking roast beef. But I just don't know what I should do! What do you guys think? How much damage is that likely to do?

 

[Twinmummy]

hiya..i had the same problem on sunday just gone..my mum's always doing family dinners and i thought to myself this is going to be hard for my first day so i told her to make a bit of chicken and green veg and just picked at that..i had to sit there and feed my kids so i couldnt not eat anything..i dont think it will affect it much if you have just protein..not sure as its my first week but my CDC said if i get stuck and have to eat out then have white and green

 

[tillyfloss]

i think you have to decide your priorities
There will always be a meal out, a drink with friends, a party, a weeding....
There are plenty of posts on here where people go along to these occasions and just have their shakes. It is hard, but if you want your loss, you need to do the plan...

Thing is, there will be people who come on and say... yeah break for a day and get straight back on it, but from experience there are many people on here who will tell you just how hard it is to get back into ketosis and back on the plans when you come off it.
Good luck though with whatever you decide..

x

 

[Uggnboo]

I think you really need to think about what is important. Your family will understand if you have started a diet and you can still be there to see your sister.

I've got a wedding at the end of May and although I will have some food I'm not drinking or eating much - I need to get into my wedding dress and THAT is important - priorities! I've just started so keep going - I would

 

[Lily]

What do you guys think? How much damage is that likely to do?

Honestly? I guess all I can tell you is how much damage it would probably do to me if I was in your shoes. And the answer for me personally would be LOADS.

The thing is, there will be other meals. And your Mum's already prepared for you to say you won't be eating, by the sound of things. It's not as though it'd come as an awful surprise if you didn't join in.

Though just because you're not eating, it doesn't mean you can't be there at the table, having your shake (freeze a tetra, LOL - they take ages to eat!). You can still be part of the celebration.

It's your call, hun. But you've managed to get so far already - it'd be a shame to risk losing the plot, IMHO.

 

[Twinmummy]

i think you have to decide your priorities
There will always be a meal out, a drink with friends, a party, a weeding....
There are plenty of posts on here where people go along to these occasions and just have their shakes. It is hard, but if you want your loss, you need to do the plan...

Thing is, there will be people who come on and say... yeah break for a day and get straight back on it, but from experience there are many people on here who will tell you just how hard it is to get back into ketosis and back on the plans when you come off it.
Good luck though with whatever you decide..

x

hi just wanted to ask..if you do end up having some chicken or green veg will it bring you out of Ketosis??

 

[Caz]

I don't really know. Part of me thinks actual food would be nice. But I know what you mean, to an extent there will always be something. Don't really have a huge amount of stuff like that though. But it has made me think a bit. That this is me having said I'm not doing to eat anything normal for months. So anything that comes up in that time, it's going to have to be a no. It's not going to be a huge number of things to be fair, but still. Just feels rubbish having to say no to everything like that.

Though to be honest, if I don't eat the dinner, I'm not going to sit there having a shake or whatever while they do. And as it's all we're doing for my sisters birthday, it kind of is a case of either I have the dinner or I don't, and don't do anything to celebrate. So instead I'll end up sitting in the other room with my soup, while they're in there. Which does make me feel bad a little. I'm not entirely sure whether my sister will mind. We'll see I guess.

I don't think I'd have a hard time with ketosis, I've got off lightly I reckon. I haven't had many symptoms, if any. My mum just came in and offered to cook me a piece of chicken, but I've said no so far.

 

[Amanda71]

Bless your Mum for offering to cook you a piece of chicken Sounds like she's trying to be supportive. Why don't you explain to your sister beforehand. There really isn't anything to stop you from sitting with them all and enjoying the social aspects of the celebration
I've been out for meals with family and just took a bar with me. They think I'm mad but I don't care lol

 

[Caz]

The thing is my sister is has learning disabilities, so while I could explain, she often takes things personally and can be quite sensitive. To be honest I just don't want to sit there having a rubbish shake while they have roast, because it'll make the shake more rubbish! That might make me sound like I'm being pathetic, to be fair... I am! But at the moment I'm not liking the idea of months of no real food and living out of a blender, so sitting there while they eat one of my favourite dinners is likely to be a bit too much for me!! I don't even want to smell it, let alone see it!!!

 

[louii]

Whats the point in doing cambridge if you are not going to at least try to stick to it, I don't get all the posts like this.

You are either doing it or your not, you knew what it would involve surely before you decided to do it.

Sisters birthday this week, night out next week, ah sure i'll just have one glass of wine.

 

[Caz]

Louii I think that's slightly harsh. I haven't said that I'm not going to stick to it. And I have been so far. I know it's only been a week yet. And no it's not like that at all. I have turned down quite a few things this week and things that people are planning because of this diet. I have been 100% no cheating. I've been working my butt off to make sure that I've stuck to it, trying to drink enough. So for you to sit there and tell me I'm not even trying, well it's wrong. I didn't even turn around and say that I was going to have the roast. I simply asked for peoples advice. And as it happens, have decided I probably won't, but that it's best I just try and avoid it. So if I hadn't made this post and people hadn't said they didn't think it was a good idea, I might have had it. So I completely see the point in these posts. This is meant to be a place of support and encouragement. Who needs that really when they're on a high? No-one. It's when you're on a low, having doubts and struggling that people really need that pick up. So maybe next time when you see people on a low you could try and be a bit more encouraging, it would be a bit more helpful for people I think.

 

[Twinmummy]

Louii I think that's slightly harsh. I haven't said that I'm not going to stick to it. And I have been so far. I know it's only been a week yet. And no it's not like that at all. I have turned down quite a few things this week and things that people are planning because of this diet. I have been 100% no cheating. I've been working my butt off to make sure that I've stuck to it, trying to drink enough. So for you to sit there and tell me I'm not even trying, well it's wrong. I didn't even turn around and say that I was going to have the roast. I simply asked for peoples advice. And as it happens, have decided I probably won't, but that it's best I just try and avoid it. So if I hadn't made this post and people hadn't said they didn't think it was a good idea, I might have had it. So I completely see the point in these posts. This is meant to be a place of support and encouragement. Who needs that really when they're on a high? No-one. It's when you're on a low, having doubts and struggling that people really need that pick up. So maybe next time when you see people on a low you could try and be a bit more encouraging, it would be a bit more helpful for people I think.

couldn't have said that better myself..!

 

[tillyfloss]

Someone asked about whether chicken and veg will bring us out of ketosis and the thing is it depends on quantity..
When you look at the meals where you eat to stay in ketosis, you can have very few green veg or salad.... a few spoonfuls.
Its not that easy though....
The gremlins are clever *******.... when you sit down at the table imagine how hard it would be to have a small bit of chicken and a few spoons of greens whilst as you say in your words they are tucking into a yummy roast. It would be so hard not to have a spoon of gravy etc etc.... I am just saying how I would feel and it your decision... just many of us here have struggled with falling of the wagon in previous attempts but few of us have intended to fail.. we all beleived we could just have a quick break.
As for your sister, I under stand the special needs thing, I have two daughters with special needs, but ultimately I think if you explained in a certain way, you could turn it around so she would be really proud of you...
lastly, I understand that a shake is not as yummy as a roast dinner, but the way I get through it ( and I have got through 1 party and cooking family meals for the last month) is by almost thinking of the shakes just as nutrition... in real life of course I would not drink milkshakes or have choc bars for breakfast dinner and tea, but I am obese. I have got this way because I cant moderate my food intake and therfore this diet and the balanced nutrition it gives me is all I need... its the vehicle to get me to the end of my journey....
You and only you can decide whether you can do this diet, CD will give you results quickly but in return for that it takes a lot of effort...

I really wish you well with your dilemma
x


Just to add.... I agree with the need for support here.... I wouldnt have got through my first week without the help and support minis offers.. and I hope my experiences (and thats all I offer) is of use x

 

[lisalulu]

The thing is my sister is has learning disabilities, so while I could explain, she often takes things personally and can be quite sensitive

I understand and feel for you hun. My sister in law is severely autistic and doesn't like it when things don't happen how she expects them too. Its hard, but I'm sure your family will help settle things with her too.

To be honest I just don't want to sit there having a rubbish shake while they have roast, because it'll make the shake more rubbish!

Try to look at it in a more positive way. That shake is part of the key to a happy, slim future for you. It might not taste great, it might not be as 'satisfying' as the roast dinner, but the end product- a slim you- really is!

But at the moment I'm not liking the idea of months of no real food and living out of a blender, so sitting there while they eat one of my favourite dinners is likely to be a bit too much for me!! I don't even want to smell it, let alone see it!!!

I hate to sound like I'm being harsh, but others who have posted before me are quite right. There will always be an occasion, a night out, a meal, a birthday..... Everyone who does CD has made a life-changing decision to lose weight and become healthy. There are always going to be choices to make along the journey, it all depends on how quickly you decide you want to get to your destination. Take it from me (who has just had a weekend off and regretting it after a 2lb gain), if you can get through this, you can get through anything. If you chose to skirt around it, you're going to stumble and want to skirt around it again at the next fork in the road.

For me, I know the next 98 days are going to be 100% cheat free SS, because I don't want to take the long path to where I wanna be, I'll take the tough road that gets me there quicker!

Sorry If I seem harsh

 

[Dieting Rambler]

Everyones journey is different, some are able to stick to CD for months on end and never give into temptation.....others have planned breaks that they plan carefully and get back on the wagon....others fall off and on and back off again.....

You have to do what is right for you, if this meal is important then plan it, have some chicken and green veg, and get back onto CD the very next day.

Remember that food is not the enemy it is what you do with it that is.

You can always come on here for support.

 

[Dieting Rambler]

Whats the point in doing cambridge if you are not going to at least try to stick to it, I don't get all the posts like this.

You are either doing it or your not, you knew what it would involve surely before you decided to do it.

Sisters birthday this week, night out next week, ah sure i'll just have one glass of wine.

You may want to be a bit more sympathic as next week it might just be you that takes a tumble. I am pleased you are so dedicated but remember we are all human.

 

[Sunshine Singer]

No one should EVER feel like they can't speak their true feelings on here. My god, if we can't share are up's and down's with eachother then who can we tell!!!! That's the first negative comment I've seen so far. Every one of us have the same situations and that's because we have lives. You can't put your life on hold because of a diet.... I agree we've decided to do CD and in theory (and in a perfect world) we would all just sail through with no problems what so ever! Some chicken is not going to kill you hun and if it makes you feel like you're part of the celebration then it's worth it as long as you stick to CD the rest of the time. xxx

 

[edibeedee]

Though to be honest, if I don't eat the dinner, I'm not going to sit there having a shake or whatever while they do. And as it's all we're doing for my sisters birthday, it kind of is a case of either I have the dinner or I don't, and don't do anything to celebrate. So instead I'll end up sitting in the other room with my soup, while they're in there. Which does make me feel bad a little. I'm not entirely sure whether my sister will mind. We'll see I guess.

Eating with your family is not the only way to celebrate. You may want to take a walk with just your sister and talk a bit or with the whole family, watch a DVD together as a family or anything else that does not involve food. And yes you can eat your shake or soup as they eat their dinner or you can take a walk by yourself until you think they are finished with their dinner. I know that it is hard to get used to this for the time being and it can feel bad, sad, to feel like you are missing out on something. You have just started so you really need to decide what you want. You have already went through starting, do you really want to start over or carry on and get finished sooner. It is all up to you. I wish you luck with your goals. Once I decided to be 100% no matter what, the weight just feel off.

Tilly, well said, I tried to rep you but it is too soon after the last rep I gave you. You always have great advice.

 

[Sunshine Singer]

Some brilliant advice on here from the others. Just think of you as the slim you that you'll soon be xxx

 

[Lilac]

Does your sister know & understand you're dieting? Would she be happy for you to sit at the table & join in the conversation & not eat?

Could you tell people (if it's other people you're concerned about) that you've had a dodgy stomach & NHS Direct have advised you not to eat for 24hrs until it settles down?

Could you cope with not eating & being at the table whilst they eat?

If you decided to join them for that ONE meal, and just have a small portion of food, would you be able to say I've had that, now I'm going straight back to my diet or would you think oh I've blown it & have a binge?

If you did eat & you had to do an extra week CD to reach your goal and have a couple of icky days whilst you got back into ketosis, would it be worth it?

Ultimately only you can decide what is right for you - my one bit of advice? If you do decide to eat the meal, enjoy every mouthful. Accept that you made the decision to enjoy the meal and don't chastise yourself for doing so. After the meal get straight back on the diet and think how well you did in choosing to just eat that and nothing else - that'll stand you in good stead for maintenance.

If you decide not to eat - be proud that you decided to stick to the plan and move towards your goal.

There isn't a right or wrong choice in this, as long as you are happy with the decision you made.