I need a serious kick up the arse pls pls i need some help !!!

[Roch]

Hey everyone,well its me back again.Have been feeling very sorry for myself recently.Yes i have had a bout of Sciatica and was in lots of pain and have had a few other minor halth problems recently but i have allowed myself to sink further and further into self pity and depression and "enough is enough" i cant allow myself to carry on like this.

My Sciatica is def getting better and i am a bit more mobile now thank god.
The problem is i am so unhappy with myself that my weight is controlling every aspect of my life 24 hrs a day.
I want to Ss again i need to try and loose some weight but am finding it very hard to pull myself up again and start being motivated.

So pls pls pls i need some support and a reall hard kick up the arse.
I know so many if u have read me posting that i am depserated to lose weight and have failed so many times but all i can say is that i have 2 try and try till i sucseec.

When my Sciatica was really bad 4 days or so and i could not even get out of my bed, my son Aaron had to get me out of bed and dresses, i was told to get to hospital but i could not call an ambulance but i did not as i felt so shame as they would not be able to lift my fat body down the stairs so i suffered in pain instead.
I THINK THAT WAS MY LOWEST POINT IN MY LIFE, WHAT WOULD OF HAPPENED IF I HAD A LIFE THREATENING ILLNESS I WOULD OF DIED IN MY HOME !!!

I cant carry on no more like this i need some help pls !

 

[Summerskye]

My dear Roch

I know that Ann has said this to you before, but I really do urge you to pester your GP as much as you possibly can to refer you for some specialist help as you really can't carry on like this without some kind of professional help.

We're all here for you darling, as you are for everyone else, but there's only so much we can do from a distance.

We all care about you so much and want you to lose weight and regain not only your health but your happiness too.

Please, please be kind to yourself and your lovely son and ask for the proper help you deserve to get from the Health Service.

Much love

 

[Biggirlsam]

Oh Roach poor you, each time you set out on your journey that flipping thing called a body kicks you soooo hard, I'll tell you what would happen if you were really ill, you would come on here and we would help!!!!!!!! You are not alone ever!!!! Start one day at a time, Each hour will be an achievement and each night you go to your bed you must promise yourself that tomorrow is 24 hours you will beat the food.Your son is brillant and you are very lucky. Shame is something you must never think about ever again- shame is something someone would say to you if you did nothing!!!! That will not happen! you start tomorrow and today you prepare to change your life. We will be there for you and we will keep nagging and asking each day and at day 7 we will celebrate with you and in no time it will be day 14 and then you will start to feel good and after that the world is yours.

 

[Roch]

Thanks Sharon hun.I have emailed Toast and am waiting for a response.
At the moment i am waiting for an appointment with the Endicrinoligist i have rung them and they said i have to wait till i get the app.
Time is passing by me and i am not helping myself.
I think i have to try Lipotrim again i really want to Ss on Cd as its easier and nearer for me but i dont think i will be allowed.
The Lipotrim pharmacy is so far away from me it takes 4 busses and over 2 hr journey there and back and as i am not driving its very hard for me.

I need to start helping myself as of now but i feel i need some help and support and a serious kick up the arse.

 

[lavender]

well roch,
I dont think you need a kick up the arse, but you do need a reality check,
If you stick to the ssing 100% you will lose weight and fast, that is a reality, however from what I have read fron your previous post, you dont give up because your weak or anything like that but because of your blood sugars.

the question is , is SSing really an option for you, medically, if your doctors has said yes then, I am guessing it is but I think what you do need is a bit more support in the early stages of ssing and some proper guidance as to how to handle the blood sugar swings. I know its a chicken and egg situation and the weight loss will really help your diabetes but I am not qualified to give you any advice on it but sweetie there has to be someone who can support you through it until it stablises?
You are such a determined lady and" where theres a will, theres a way" so do not give up, I have every faith that you will crack this and you want it so badly you deserve to crack it.

Motivation,
how much do you really, really want it, ??? You CAN do it, you have the power to do it, just be brave and take that step forward, we are all here to help you however we can.
I am sending you huge amounts of will power to start you off because once you get going you will fly!!!

Big hugs, come on now, you KNOW you can do it!!!

 

[Roch]

Thanx Heidi but i am not diabetic its just that when i dont ease myself into Ssing i end up with low blood sugar probs but otherwise i have never had orobs with low blood sugars.

At the moment i am waiting to hear if i can work my way down gradually to Ssing.
I am so desperate to do this i have 2 do this,but i really think that i must be weak or like staying this size as i am still eating and not dropping weight, whats wrong with me !

 

[htpink]

Roch - i know you mentioned surgery in a previous post and also that you tried a balloon before. Where does your Dr stand on this? As previously said from your posts i wonder if SS is for you - also even without the other problems you suffer from it is incredibly difficult to get back to SS after the first time.

You are right , you do need to do something about this, you are also right that you and Aaron deserve more than this - maybe its time to think of the alternatives to conventional dieting?

Just a thought - btw i did have a gastric band fitted in 2000 - any info gladly given.

 

[Isobel1965]

Roch - I don't know if you read my diary today, but a neighbouring family have been murdered in the next street to my mum's house and it's been a great shock to me, as well as the whole community.

I think the overall feeling that I've got right now is that life is so fragile and so very short and bad things can happen to innocents who then have no choice, power or control over their lives.

We all have the power and the responsibility to ensure that every day of our life is as happy as possible - we don't know what is around the corner. If something in your life is making you unhappy, then we must change it and soon.

I'm sorry if this is coming across all wrong and I'm crying as I type this but I just really wanted to say that those poor murdered children have had their choices taken away from them. We are so lucky to still have the gift of life.

Make your choices, darling - use all of the help available to get you where you want to be. Scream and shout if you have to - just do it.

We are all behind you all the way.

lots of love

 

[Cake'n'eat it]

Hi Roch

Being in pain is the worst feeling in world particulary when there seems no end in site. You may have little control over your pain but you can take control over your eating - its a tough one especially when you are feeling so wrotten. The truth is though that only YOU can make these adult choices. I don't know if you've seen Gerry Maquire with some Cruise when he yells 'Show me the money' down the phone he really really means it. You have to ask yourself the qestion do you? If you do then you a strong woman who can stand tall, chin and say 'I can do this'. Take each day as a new beginning - if you need to stay in bed for the first few days while your blood sugar settles then do it. I had to go into hibernation for at least three days at the beginning but think of the other side - you will emerge smiling and back on the bath to health.

I wish you all the luck in the world and pray that your pain beings to ease sooner rather than later. Big HUgs

 

[Roch]

Thanks Isobel,i did see it in the news this morning its terible.
I know life is fragile and precious but i feel i am wasting ,y life and need to take things in hane.
I have sent a Pm to Linda Cdc to see if together we can find a way to work my down to Ssing although i have had probs with low blood sugars b4 which is a prob for peeps on Cd.

Thanks for all the caring thoughts really appreciate them x

Hels thanks hun i have spoken to my doc abot wls but i am 2 scared in case i die under surgery because of my size.
I want to Ss and i have to try one more time. x

 

[Isobel1965]

I wish you all the luck in the world, hun!

 

[lavender]

Sorry for making the mistake that you were diabetic,
I used to have the blood sugar highs and lows when I was over weight too so I know how that feels.

have you thought of the GI diet, the results are not so quick but it would be a good way to balance out your blood sugars before going for SS.

Whats the longest you have managed to SS for?? is there a day that it always get to you, I find day 3 a tough one, I am on it today!!
I used to say to myself that I must want to stay fat as if I really wanted it then I would do it, but its not that simple.
ireally love being slim, it has changed my life totally but it does mean that sometimes I go a bit out side my comfort zone and cant use being fat anymore as an excuse to stop me doing things.

there is nothing wrong with you, except your human and all that goes with it.

 

[Roch]

Hi Heidi,alot of peeps seem to think if u have probs with blood sugars its diabetic related .
got to day 17 Ssing but that time i eased myself into Ssing by cutting down from 1500 over a period of 10 days so i had no probs.
Each time i have had probs with low blood sugar was when u threw myself in from being a carb addict to Ssing my body got a serious shock.

I need to sort this out once and for all.Last time when i got to day 17 that was exactly a year ago next week so would be a good time for me to get back on track.

Anyway its not up 2 me now its up 2 my doc and Cd head office so fingers crossed.

Take care hun and thanks x

 

[KittyB]

Roch,
Please keep badgering and nagging at your GP to get some assistance.
I hate hearing how low this is making you feel. If you can manage to do some of the CD plans can you not stick to one that doesn't have the low carb, just until your body can cope with the SS or 790?

I wish I could help, but am always here if you need an ear.

Thinking about you.
Lots of love
Kitty xxx

 

[lavender]

well I have everything crossed for you,tell them we will send the boys round if they wont let you, you can SO do this, they have got to let you.
sleep well. sweet dreams of slimness coming to a body near you very soon!!!

 

[Isis]

Thanks Isobel,i did see it in the news this morning its terible.
I know life is fragile and precious but i feel i am wasting ,y life and need to take things in hane.
I have sent a Pm to Linda Cdc to see if together we can find a way to work my down to Ssing although i have had probs with low blood sugars b4 which is a prob for peeps on Cd.

Thanks for all the caring thoughts really appreciate them x

Hels thanks hun i have spoken to my doc abot wls but i am 2 scared in case i die under surgery because of my size.
I want to Ss and i have to try one more time. x

Roch,

If you want to try SS one more time (easing into it), then JOIN ME NOW. I'm only on day 2. I remember you doing it for 17 days and how great you felt at the time hun.

If SS is not going to be the best choice for you medically, then let's support you to find another way, eh?

Love,

Lacey..xx

 

[Isobel1965]

Hope you're feeling better this morning, Roch, honey!

 

[Roch]

Morning everyone.I would luv 2 start Ssing today but unfortunately becuase i did have a prob with low blood sugars i am not allowed to throw myself into Ssing.

I am going to speak to Linda Cdc today and i hopefully will be given a letter and a form for my doc 2 sign.If my doc approves which i am positive she will as she allowed me to do LT then i have to work my way down from 1500 to SSing so i ease myself in as each time i have just started Ssing without cutting down carbs i have had orobs with low blood sugars, but whats so weird is that it is the only time it happens 2 me.

So fingers crossed, i will speak to Linda today and hopefully get an app with my doc for her approval Asap.

Well have 2 log off,got loads to do, my back is so much better am not taking the voltarol any more or the painkillers it seems to have practically dossapeared, did not take any meds yesterday either thank god.

I have housework galore to catch up with.Aaron has done the necessary things since i have been laid up with Sciatica but i have 2 do so much today, so am off for a shower then get started.

Thanks for all the support, catch u all later xx

 

[flirty40greeneyes]

Hiya Roch
I'm so glad to hear your back is better today. Don't go over doing it with too much housework though!

I do hope everything works ok with the Dr and you can start SS again. I've started back SS again today - so need you to keep me on the straight and narrow!

Take care - and will check again later to see if you've heard back re the SS-ing.