I need some help.. losing my mind

Discussion in 'Cambridge Weight Plan' started by DEvans, 18 April 2007 Social URL.

  1. DEvans

    DEvans Full Member

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    Right, I am working with someone who is just shockingly incompetent. I don't know what else to say. At this point in time I feel really low as I am their manager and they are making it difficult to give any sort of criticism as they start to cry. They have been here for a very long time and does not know how to do the simplest administrative stuff.

    Ok this is freaking me out and stressing me out. it is driving me to have very strong cravings and nibble too. I'm trying really hard to deal with it but this situation is really not good for my diet neither my mental state. I wish we could tell people grow the hell up but we can't so I'm keeping a civil tongue about it. :cry:

    I wish I could let out a scream. At this point I also wish I could go for a nice long jog but I'm at work.

    I didn't know where else to just get stuff off my chest.

    Any advice please.

    D
     
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  3. Coley

    Coley Re-starter

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    Dunno if this is any use....can you sack them?

    If you can't do your job....surely they should be sacked?

    Failing my evil approach, can you go to your line manager and explain the situation? maybe it is just a thing of re-phrasing how you say it?

    How embarrassing....I'd never cry at work. dearie me.

    Don't munch!!!! That won't sort them...or you.....come on.......be hardcore!!

    xx
     
  4. Bekie

    Bekie Full Member

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    Dont snack or nibble it wont help the situation and you'll feel awful afterwards especially as you are doing so well... It is difficult though i agree with Coley is there a manager you can talk to because diet or not this isn't fair on you if she cant do her job properly she isnt right for it unfortunately.

    I hope you get it sorted and stay away from the nibbles :)

    Bekie
     
  5. DEvans

    DEvans Full Member

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    It isn't as simple as that. As we have to find out all sorts of things and give them warnings.

    Arghh!!!!!!

    Its a longer process than normal.

    D
     
  6. Bekie

    Bekie Full Member

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    :eek: Seems mad that they don't make it easier, she really is making it difficult for you :( The only thing i can suggest is and this sounds awful is ignore the tears, ask her why she is upset and explain your just trying to help

    Its a really difficult situation :(
     
  7. DEvans

    DEvans Full Member

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    Hi Bekie, I have spoken to my manager but as I mentioned its a long process and the my manager just provides me with the best advice.

    I'm not nibbling, just having loads of water at the moment but that's wrecking havoc on my bladder too. I'm not expecting a big loss again this week because I was really down about it on Friday so I came of the wagon. I'm on track again but starting this week has gotten me back down to feeling low as they are continually doing stuff to drive me crazy. I'm holding my tongue at the mo.

    Tomorrow we have an in year review for them and I'm preparing myself mentally to be honest to them about where her performance issues are heading.

    D
     
  8. hippoellie

    hippoellie CDC

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    Hi There- I manage a team of people, and I think nothing can be more frustrating than the situation that you describe- and it is more common than you think! First bit of advice is DO NOT let someone else's behaviour derail you from your personal goal- you are much better than them and much stronger than that! Second- are you in a big enough organisation to have an HR Dept? They will give you some advice on how to deal with the matter informally before you get into the (yes I agree VERY lengthy) formal stuff. Third, have you thought about introducing a neutral 3rd party when you talk to this person about their performance- a kind of mediator. I often find that this offer gets people back on the straight and narrow, because while they might use tears on you, trying it on with another person is usually a stage too far- sorry to be cynical about the tears, but I have seen that trick played too many times.

    BTW my staff will tell you I am generally a good and sympathetic manager- the above makes me sound like the she-***** from hell!!
     
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