In need of a hug or a kick up the butt or something!?

[*Emsie*]

I set my target last week. My target not a figure on a chart that I am told I should be but a weight I thought I would be happy at for my reasons. I was anxious about doing this for q long time because I felt that it was putting myself up for criticism because I am not a perfect weight etc
When I set it and said I wanted to lose another 3lbs straight away my mum in law said oh go for 4!
Then tonight when got to group my c asked if I wanted to enter woman of the year which was nice then to follow up with if I did I'd have to set a lower target and said this target in front of my mum in law.
Am currently rather gutted and feeling beeped off with the whole thing! Wanted to walk out of group but pleased with myself for riding it out even though gained 2lb this week.
Its going to be really hard to go back next week though tbh and am feeling very much like stuffing my face or going the other way to have a super loss next week but I don't want to feel like that I just want to 'be'
Feel fatter than I ever have at this moment in time!

 

[JoC]

It is totally understandable that you do not want to put too much pressure on yourself. You know how you feel and what weight you are happy at. It is so hard when others comment on what they think your weight should be.

You have done amazingly well 123lbs is a fantastic achievement. Good luck in achieving your goal what ever you decide it to be. x

 

[kingleds]

Definity won't be getting a kick from me hun - so hug it is

Your target weight is no ones business but yours. Your consultant probably shouldn't have said anything in front of your MIL about it.

You know what weight you feel comfortable at and you are right not to push too much pressure on yourself. You have done amazingly well - and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

xxx

 

[Shrimpy]

Emsie, you've done bloody amazing. Your target is exactly that YOUR target, it is your choice and it is how you want to be. Remember according to healthy weight charts I could lose another stone and a half - which could concievably make me in a size 4! I MEAN WTF! You know your body and what you want from it.

*MASSIVE HUGGLES* and a huge pat on the back for doing so well!

Your C probably thought you'd be comfortable in front of your MIL, but really shouldn't have said anything.

Ok, here's the mini butt kick, because while the hugs have their place the butt kick also has its! Don't let the idiots get you down. Remember their issues are exavctly that their issues! Don't let their stupidity lead to you ending up in the binge shame cycle. You are in control of your body- so take control. It's your target and you are going to get there!

On an aside, could you call your C and tell her how she made you feel, so the matter's "put to bed" before next WI?

(Ok, essay over)

 

[*Emsie*]

Thankyou x
You are right Shrimpy. I suppose after having to defend my weight for so long it would be nice not to have to but guess everybody does at some points to idiots and people who think they can comment!
Its made me feel a bit disheartened with the sw system too which is a shame as I would like to be a consultant but we shall see when have had a good nights sleep etc maybe I will feel better x

 

[Shrimpy]

There are some weight loss rules for comps afaik, but there are other comps. I didn't think there was a loss limit for woman of the year, but I have only been doing this just over a year.

You could still be a consultant, you *should* be a consultant, it would be a good to have one such as you who is proof of SW. My current (brand new) C is a bit pants. She used to be "massive" (complete with bubbled out hand motions) but with the help of SW she's lost 1st 3lbs. :eyeroll: Don't get me wrong, losing any weight that makes you unhappy is a good thing, but I've lost almost 5st and there are plenty of others in the group with 6 or 7 stone to lose. - sorry off trackness-

Rest your brain, mull it over, but I would be chuffed to have someone as considerate and understanding as you for my C.

 

[who_la_hoop]

I agree with Shrimpy - your target weight is YOUR target weight, and it's entirely up to you when you call target. You have done amazingly well - 123 pounds! What an inspiration! I know it's hard, but try not to let a few thoughtless comments get you down. *hugs*

 

[*Emsie*]

Had rubbish nights sleep as it was buzzing round my brain but am going to try and not let it get me down and fous on me and what I want Thanks for the support xxx

 

[Clareel]

Just seen this Emsie but couldn't read and run, you have done amazingly well with your weight loss and it is only you who can decide what your target it. I think what you're aiming for is perfectly reasonable, healthy and more importantly it should be something you can stick with, which I'm sure you will

As suggested above perhaps contact your consultant before the next class and just explain how you feel? If you don't want to do that then just remember we are all here for you.

Keep your chin up xxx

 

[zellka]

I agree you have come amazingly far already and where you feel comfortable ending that journey is your decision alone and should be respected and celebrated for what you have achieved. Hold you head up and don't let that comment ruin the proud feeling you have of how well you have done. Hugs

 

[*Theresa*]

Why would you have to make your target lower to be woman of the year...it looks to me like you have done fantastically well and would deserve recognition for that.

I too would contact your consultant and discuss your concerns for fear that if you didn't she would consider it ok to talk about such things in front of your MIL in future.

 

[jaylou]

You have done amazingly. SW annoy me a little with things like this - they allow us to set any target weight, in any range, yet then you have to be a certain weight (or bmi) to enter competitions. It doesn't quite compute in my mind.

Anyway, that aside, target is for you hun, and what you have done is incredible. Don't lose sight of that. xxx

 

[*Theresa*]

That's where I'm confused though as I was nominated for WOTY last year and as far as I knew you just needed to have lost 3 stone or more....well she has clearly done that

 

[*Emsie*]

Thanks everyone not sure what to do about contacting c or not but am feeling abit better about it. I don't really want things like that discussed in front of my mum in law though. She even said shall I go away and my c said no then went on to say the weight I would need to be!? My friend thinks shes jealous of me and wanted to have a dig that it not enough!? I think it probably se wanted her moment of fame or trip to the awards or somethng as my c?!
Part of me thinks I shouldnt give her the satisfacion of having got to me another part thinks I should let her know. In a way its such a shame that at this stage of MY journey I should be so dissapointed in her! If it had been earlier on I would have just changed groups but that seems bizarre at this point?!

 

[Shrimpy]

I would contact her and let her know that you did feel let down and disappointed by the way she treated you. If she doesn't know then she can't fix it, eh? Plus, at least then there is some closure, IYKWIM. There probably is a little bit of pride and maybe a bit of the "wanting to show off what she helped you to achieve" but there may also be a bit of her saying, you've done so well a few more lbs, would make you "perfect" so, why not go for it... She may have meant it in an encouraging way but it came out backwards, if you speak to her at least she can try and rectify the relationship. She is only human, but we can all try and be the best we can, and maybe she just royally ATE her foot... so by talking to her about it you can give her a second chance (& with the added bonus of you rising above)

 

[*Emsie*]

I have contacted her albeit by text and said I was upset as would have preffered the chat in private and though was sure she hadn't meant to upset me I needed to let her know. She replied and said she was glad I knew her well enough to know she wouldnt have meant to upset me and was glad I could tell her. She said she had assumed it was ok as it was family but she was wrong and shouldnt have and can only apologise and it won't happen again.
Thanks again for all the support and good advice . Shrimpy you have been a star xxx

 

[Clareel]

Glad this has worked out for you hun, feeling uncomfy with your consultant is the last thing you need just as you're getting to target.

Best wishes

 

[kingleds]

Yay! Glad that you took Shrpy's advice & that your C is not taking it wrong. Well done!

 

[Shrimpy]

Glad it went well! Told you she was probably just tasting toe lint!