In shock!! Off subject....

[Lauratheloop]

I dunno what to do

I basically been mates with this guy for a few months, we were really close and told eachother loads really trusted each other, anyway a few things happen and there a distance between us now.. We still talk every so often and sometimes he is lovely but then other times he seems really distant and un interested in talking....

Anyway I'm not sure what I was doing and this will sound like I'm a stalker but I was just messing on google and I stumbled across 1 article on a search and after reading and re searching it's the only article on the matter, but basically this guy was involved in an accident 8 years ago tomorrow where by his decision to over take someone lead to a woman on the back of a motorbike was killed... She basically died from multiple injuries

I was in so much shock.... His such a lovely guy and the article brought me to tears as it detailed some of the court hearing.... The verdict was accidental death

Anyway it's the anniversary tomorrow, this guy doesn't know I obviously now know about this but his a mate and I would trust him with anything I want to let him know I'm here without makin it obvious what I'm referring too.... Should I text him in the morning or just leave it??
I know how sensitive it is and whilst 8 years have past I cannot imagine if you were responsible for an accident which was fatal that you would forget that no matter what time has passed..... I Wana show my support??

Advice please .... Sorry it's such a sad random post :-(

Xxx

 

[xxsparklesoxxx]

that is a really difficult situation. I witnessed a car accident where someone died right infront of us, there was no one to blame and nothing more we could have done but you still blame yourself... obviously this situation is different but the idea is there. when it happened to me i was glad people were there to talk with me it helped. maybe he is the same, he might need a hug, so to speak and a shoulder to cry on. Im not too sure however of telling him that you know. he obviously trusts u n might think that u have in a way betrayed him by finding out yourself. maybe a couple of quick texts to ask him how he is and let him know that you are there for him... it gives him the opportunity to confide in you or not.

sorry for the long reply, was hard question


good luck =] xxx

 

[Lauratheloop]

No thank you so much I know it wasn't the easiest of questions

I know he goes counselling but his always said this was because his ex wanted him to go so he could learn to open up to better their relationship im now thinking maybe it was this since the court hearing he said he was having flashbacks and nightmares---- god my heart sank and I cried thinking of him being in that situation and how he must've felt

I guess he hasn't mentioned it because he has moved on maybe and wants to forget... The more people k ow the more his reminded

What I don't want to do is text and say I know I was just thinking of putting something like
"hey Hun, I just want to say I hope your ok? Here if you want to talk"
Or shall I just simple text "hope your ok"
And then I will just hope he thinks in some sixth sense of a way I know the significance of the day and he will feel better knowing I'm always there when times are bad...

Sorry I'm rambling now but I love him to pieces and don't want him to deal with the day alone ... I shared so much with him I want him to know I would never think less of him

Xx

 

[mrtc]

Surely he will soon realise he's lucky to have a friend like you, your plan of a simple text sounds a good idea

 

[Lauratheloop]

Thanks Hun.... I don't think I even care if he rolls his eyes at it but I'm assuming his gona be having a rough day tomorrow as long as I can say I was a good friend that's all that matters

I'll email you tomorrow babes xxx sorry I haven't done so yet xxx