Joke sent in my Email

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by MsJMC, 31 July 2008 Social URL.

  1. MsJMC

    MsJMC Strong women stay slim

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    I have promised to shop at Asda from now on.........................


    This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office
    to a customer in
    Oxford :

    Dear Mrs. Murray,
    While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the
    Tesco Loyalty Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering
    banning you and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband
    stops his antics.
    Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by our
    surveillance cameras:

    1. June 15:
    Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in
    people's trolleys when they weren't looking.

    2. July 2:
    Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at
    5-minute intervals.

    3. July 7:
    Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to
    feminine products aisle.

    4. July 19:
    Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
    'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.

    5. August 14:
    Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted
    area.

    6. September 15:
    Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told
    shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calor
    gas stove.

    7. September 23:
    When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he
    began to cry and asked, 'Why can't you people just leave me
    alone?'

    8. October 4:
    Looked right into the security camera; used it as a
    mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.

    9. November 10:
    While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the
    Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants were.

    10. December 3:
    Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the
    'Mission Impossible' theme.

    11. December 6:
    In the kitchenware aisle, practised the 'Madonna
    look' using different size funnels.

    12. December 18:
    Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled
    'PICK ME!' 'PICK ME!'

    13. December 21:
    When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assumed
    the foetal position and screamed 'NO! NO! It's those voices
    again.'
    And; last, but not least:

    14. December 23:
    Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while;
    then yelled, very loudly, 'There is no toilet paper in here.'
     
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  3. Taz

    Taz Spam Hunter

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    Ha ha I love it! That is so funny
     
  4. MsJMC

    MsJMC Strong women stay slim

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    Reading it I thought it was a Joke but its not ho lol
     
  5. misscheeky

    misscheeky Gold Member

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    haha very funny :)
     
  6. Bananas

    Bananas Gold Member

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  7. Lisa Marie

    Lisa Marie Silver Member

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  8. Taz

    Taz Spam Hunter

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    I think what I found funniest is thats the sort of things that me and my mates used to do!
     
  9. MsJMC

    MsJMC Strong women stay slim

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    lol , Taz , but did you grow out of it lol
     
  10. Taz

    Taz Spam Hunter

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    Err, not really no! Ha ha
     
  11. MsJMC

    MsJMC Strong women stay slim

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    good for you ! I think you have to be a little crazy sometimes !
     
  12. Taz

    Taz Spam Hunter

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    Definately, it keeps you young!
     
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