Katycakes Won't Give Up...

Katy my lovely, I have no wise words from Beck as I am only a few pages in as I keep falling asleep :D not that I am board with it I just take it to bed and I guess going back to work I am quite tired. As Bess said my reply isn't a move on forget blah blah I am now realising there is alot more to this over eating malarkey :) it's years of behaviour and how we have coped with life. If I am late from work that is a danger time for me and if I am late, tired and grumpy I've had it and I too reach for stupid stuff. The demons in my head last night and the night before was agony and like what other's have said I have done some spectacular falls from grace. You and I know this will take time but we will get there and there will be highs and lows along the way. But we all support each other and offer words of comfort. And thanks to YOU I got through those sad day's I had. Please forgive my ramblings I find it hard to be short and brief x
 
hey katy hope you are ok. I found the Beck diet book in a The Works book shop yesterday for £3, going to start reading it today.
 
Hello and thanks guys... DM, Bess, Wales, Trisha, Herewego, Sarah-Lou, Sleepy, Shanny, Curly & Jess, plus Chels and the others who 'held my hand' through the wobbles on Thursday and Friday. I'm sorry for going awol, just felt a bit too fragile to post, I was worried that whatever I might say would come back & catch me out... bit crazy I know. A bit of embarrassment in there too, like you Jess it took a bit of courage to start this post.

So... Thursday night was a little binge, Friday night another, both times I was absolutely determined to eat and nothing would have stopped me. (Or so I thought at the time). Friday's fall was less full-on, I tried to choose 'healthier' options and ended up chucking chocolate in bin, a real battle was going on. On Sat morning I felt torn, half of me wanting to get on track and pull back from the edge, half wanting to fall into a full-on blow out. On Sat morning I had the house to myself, and could get my hands on tin of Xmas choc biscuits, choc brazils, fudge, etc that had been impossible to get to the previous evenings. If I had, I would have eaten the LOT. I pictured it, liked the picture. Then I weighed myself, and the illusion shattered - 2lbs back on. Glycogen maybe, but... if I ate all that rubbish there'd be more, much more, because coming back from a really full-on binge is very, very hard for me.

So... I was back on track, just like that, a shift in my head and suddenly I didn't care anymore about the chocolate. Took the fudge over to Mum. Went for a long walk. Another walk Sunday, and 4 shakes each day, and no hunger or cravings or sadness. I am still 1lb up from my Thursday morning weight, but I deserve to be, so no fighting it - it will come down again. I lurked on minis now and then but couldn't post, couldn't let myself think too much about it, had to just get on. I am sorry of I worried you all... I am OK, really.

Today I see my CDC and know I will not be pleased with the WI but am determined not to let that keep me from being 100%. I'm thinking another week maybe of SS and then move up to 810, see how I go. God, so looking forward to getting more porridge and some bars!

xxx
 
Well done Katy for swatting Fred away, like an annoying fly buzzing around your head :D You pulled yourself back from the brink and that gets a pat on the back from me!!!!

So glad that you bit the bullet and posted all of that. No-one is here to judge, just support and encourage.

Have a brill day. xx
 
Katycakes said:
On Sat morning I had the house to myself, and could get my hands on tin of Xmas choc biscuits, choc brazils, fudge, etc that had been impossible to get to the previous evenings. If I had, I would have eaten the LOT. I pictured it, liked the picture. Then I weighed myself, and the illusion shattered - 2lbs back on. Glycogen maybe, but... if I ate all that rubbish there'd be more, much more, because coming back from a really full-on binge is very, very hard for me.

So... I was back on track, just like that, a shift in my head and suddenly I didn't care anymore about the chocolate. Took the fudge over to Mum. Went for a long walk. Another walk Sunday, and 4 shakes each day, and no hunger or cravings or sadness.
xxx
Click to expand...


Now that Katy, is real progress. The 1lb on is utterly irrelevant. I'm so proud of you and glad of the help that your story gives to me. Well done! xxx
 
CDC came, WI was not good as I expected... after having shake & umpteen herb teas, and on her scales which weigh about 2lb more than mine, I was 12st 10, eek. However, my scales said 12 8 this morning and that's what I'm going from... so no worries really. I have still lost 8lbs by her reckoning, I make it 10lbs and it WAS 11lb back on Thursday before I decided to mess up... so it will be back to 11lbs again, and more, before long.

Good thing is I now have good supplies of CD stuff, bars, porridge, my staple choc shakes and a variety of other old faves for mousse-making purposes! The downside is she cannot see me for 16 days, but I will survive. I am adjusting ticker every thursday based on my own WIs, so all should be well. Scarily, CDC told me she has put on over 3 st since last spring. I guess very few of us have this thing taped.

Had a mint choc bar of lunch, yum... have so missed the bars. However, almost at once a low-level sore tummy has started - I remember this from first time around, the first few bars gave me not a sore tummy exactly but some discomfort... crampy feeling. It stopped after that, so I know it will this time too. I have enough shakes to SS for 16 days... so will review as I go, but hoping I can stay on it for a while and get the losses moving again.

Hope everyone is having a good monday!

xxx
 
Hey Katy..
8 lbs is a great loss..... and 10 pounds by your scales is even better...
Why cant your cdc see you for 16 days?
Its funny even if you are a cdc your weight does still change I am struggling a bit that I have gone up as I feel as a cdc I want to be a good advert and I want to be exactly where I was at goal.. Will get back there for sure..
I am so with you hon...... i must do this .. I must get this stone off too. I can understand so much where your coming from!!
We can do this!!!!!!!!!!!! Positive vibes coming your way xxxx
 
Well hello katy. :wavey:Its great to catch up and a big well done on the loss. Just remember we all have our ups and downs.
curlywurly1234 said:
Its funny even if you are a cdc your weight does still change I am struggling a bit that I have gone up as I feel as a cdc I want to be a good advert and I want to be exactly where I was at goal.. Will get back there for sure..
I am so with you hon...... i must do this .. I must get this stone off too. I can understand so much where your coming from!!
Click to expand...
Here here Curly! Even Cwpc's struggle, we are human after all....honest. We know just what you are going through. I started again today and someone has brought in big wedges of xmas cake. It ran through my mind 'shall I start tomorrow' but in reality all its doing is putting off what I want to achieve. Stay strong lovely xx:hug99:
 
Thank you Curly, you are right of course! Vibes received with thanks and a batch sent off in your direction by return!

Biggest of hugs, Miss JT... and thanks for the wise words. So lovely to see you back on minis, feel free to take me by the scruff of the neck and give me a good talking to if I need it! I feel so lucky to have not just my own CDC but my minis CDCs as well... lovely gentle Lelly and inspiro-gal Curly and cool & crazy Miss JT! Well done on saying no to the Xmas cake... go girl! The enthusiasm on here today is infectious!

xxx
 
Hi Katy, I agree about you weighing on the same day every week. 16 days is just too long to wait between WI's. It is seeing the downward trend that keeps us strong and motivated.

You will soon be back to -11lbs and more!!!!

Nice to have some variety in your cupboard. I'm down to Oriental soups, 2 spicy tomato and one banana shake. Only the banana is appealing but will have to make do until I get fresh supplies tomorrow night :sigh:

xx
 
ooh, good luck with that... more wheelbarrows with Sexy Sam?

xxx
 
Lol... you will be in trouble Jess!

xxx
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

Blubell._.0422
Step4 1200kcal Hello anyone who is still here
Replies
2
Views
529
Blubell._.0422
Blubell._.0422
L
Getting motivated
Replies
3
Views
2K
Visualizing
Visualizing
M
Dukan Diet the Caribbean way
Replies
1
Views
1K
AliGal
AliGal
P
Here we go again
Replies
3
Views
151
Blubell._.0422
Blubell._.0422
Y
Weight loss journey intro -
Replies
5
Views
1K
Zafira
Zafira
Back
Top