Living with emotions whilst you can't eat to comfort yourself

[echo159]

Hi all,


Hope your all doing really well. I got weighed last night and have lost another 3lb's yay

This past month for me has been an emotinal roller coaster to say the least! I met someone and was seeing him for the past few wks then we split up on Sunday. I am really finding it difficult to actually cope with my emotions now that i can't eat to comfort myself. Is anyone else finding this? My dad got rushed into hospital this morning aswell. He is ok now thank god but it's just another thing to worry about along with all the other daily life stuff that we have to put up with like work and other issues.

Anyway the only thing i seem to be able to control right now is my diet so that's a really good thing. Going on holiday May 1st and it can't come quick enough!

Take care guys xoxo

 

[Agnes]

Hi echo,

Congrats on your loss! Your post sounds v familiar to me. Before I started CDC I never thought I could cope with emotions, stress etc without stuffing my face so I was surprised to find out I actually can. Being in control of what I put in my mouth makes me feel more in control of my life in general which is an amazing feeling. I've learned in the past weeks that I can deal with tough times at work, family etc and I learned to allow myself to "feel" the emotion rather than eating it away (sorry if this sounds a bit too much like a self help book but that's the only way I can explain it). Last week I didn't get a promotion at work I was hoping for, instead of smiling sweetly and have a secret binge I told my boss I was disappointed and reiterated why I thought I should have that job. When I went home, instead of feeling sorry for myself I booked a weekend away. Sorry for the rambling post but learning how to deal with emotions is just as important I think as losing the weight. xx

 

[MsJMC]

you've done so well and thats great that you have not slipped into food , yes its finding something else rather than food now when these sort of things happen . doing so well x i'm sure the holiday is the key to you staying on track!

 

[Yambabe]

Since starting my diet I have been keeping a blog.

I write in it more or less daily and in some detail about how I am feeling on any particular day, and why.

Although my blog is a public one I don't feel embarrassed knowing that anyone can read my innermost thoughts, which I was a bit worried about at first.

I find it really therapeutic to write everything down and get it "out there", although I do think I have a tendency to over-analyse myself sometimes. I've also found it useful when people have read it and commented, and that includes both strangers and friends.

Sometimes it helps to have someone else's objective viewpoint on your feelings cos it makes you take a step back from yourself and try and look at yourself more objectively too if that makes sense.

Sometimes it helps to be able to write stuff down and express it (and maybe re-read it and change it a few times) without having to face an actual person and tell them how I am feeling.

Just a thought. In your particular case I would write some letters if not a blog. Write one to your ex, tell him what you liked about him and your relationship, tell him how hurt you feel now it has ended and THEN tell him how you intend to move your life along and get over him!

Similarly write a letter to your dad - you don't have to give it to him (although at some point you may want to). I lost my mum very suddenly just before Xmas last year and would love just one last chance to tell her how much she meant to me, how she influenced my life (for good and for bad) and how much I miss her now. I wrote her a letter on what would have been her birthday in January instead, and I think it really helped me start comig to terms with what had happened.

There are so many other ways that you can find comfort without needing to use food, or drink either for that matter. Writing helps me. I hope you can find something that will work as well for you.

 

[discojen]

I had this exact conversation with my husband 2 days ago. I'm on day 9 and had a few upsets in the last couple of weeks that I would have eaten my way through before CD. Problem is, I haven't quite learned how to deal with them without food yet so just had a good cry instead!
x

 

[great things]

i think that everyone on here can relate. we can all jump straight for food but on CD it is hard to find that crux useful anymore cause if you do jump for food you let yourself down and if you don't you've got to let your emotions play out in a different way.

for me it is exercise. to control my weight if i got upset i used to go for a walk and walked it out, then i stopped and ate. i now like to go to they gym or out running. it's suprising what you can think of when you are exercising and how you can work out your issues. it's also nice to zone out too.

my daughter can really be getting to me somedays where i could literally murder her, she's 3 with teenage temper tantrums lol. after an hour at the gym i am a lot more chilled out and can deal with her.

the last time i did CD i had a few problems that came back to haunt me and caused me untold upset, work related. i could have drank a bottle of wine to myself but after talking it through with my cdc i found that, yes i could have a drink but it wouldn't make me feel any better in the long term, just dull it for a while. at least cd gives you a reason to hit the problems in life straight on instead of hiding behind something.

i hope that you can sort you head out in the most comfortable way possible without turning to food.

 

[Surfhunny]

I've cried so many times while I've been on CD, usually I'd dull these feelings with food, but I can't. My BF and I broke up just before Christmas and I just let go.. and ended up putting on a stone over Christmas because I was emotional eating. But I decided I couldn't let a boy set me back like that and I've now lost the weight I put on.

I still have ups and downs, where I feel really emotional and can't use food to fix it, so I just come on here and vent on my diary instead and it helps, if nothing else getting my feeling out of my head and into my diary gives me a bit of separation. And people on here are so supportive that really helps me.

You will find new coping mechanisms, be it exercise, or just doing something to take your mind off it all for a little while. You'll get there xx

 

[echo159]

Hi guys, thanks so much for all of your advise and comments. It's good to know we are not alone on this journey and that we have each other to chat to. I am finding myself going to the gym more and more now i am single again. I really have to push myself sometimes but i've found it helps to get on the tread mill and burn those feelings away and it gives me time to think through my emotions instead of eating them away. It will always be difficult but i hope it gets easier for us all. You have all done so well and should be really proud of yourselves.

Thanks again xoxo

 

[jabbathehut]

I'm feeling really lousy at the mo - missing my hubby, dog ill, child ill, terrible guilt feelings for letting work down, due on my period.......I did have a little pick last night but it just made me angry with myself - yet another emotion to try to cope with!!
My stock of CD stuff runs out tomorrow and I haven't heard anything from my CDC today yet - as of yesterday she was still stuck in Turkey! This morning my little voice was telling me that I was gonna have to come off plan anyways until she can send the stuff on so I may as well just quit today and eat. However, when I looked at myself in the mirror and saw how different my face looks already after only losing 33lbs, I decided not to eat until I absolutely have to. There's no point throwing the towel in and gaining more weight that I absolutely have to.

I really wish I could find a food substitute when I feel like this

 

[echo159]

Hey hun, have you checked the Cambridge web site for another councillor in your area? Don't give in, you can do it. xx