LOSING MY CONFIDENCE

[SHAZA]

Is anyone out there feeling like I am at the moment

Getting ready to go out last night and I dont feel confident in anything I wear at the moment, I dont like my face anymore and tried about 10 outfits on and didnot look nice

Lost 3 stone so my clothes are big and baggy but I dont even feel good in the new clothes I bought even though they are a 22 instead of a 28

Even though I have been very overweight for a long long time now I always felt good about myself and thought I looked good when going out

HELP

 

[Gen]

Hiya Shaza... first of all well done on losing 3 stone and going from a size 28 to 22.... :wow: :wow: :wow:

on not feeling too great going out last night... maybe you were just having a bad day??? I'm sure everytime you went out before you lost the weight that you felt great???

I do know that we are works in progress and sometimes it can be hard to imagine getting to the finish line but you have done amazingly well and our minds like to play tricks on us sometimes....

can you explain a bit more how you felt going out last night???

love

 

[magickmel]

Wow Shaza, you are doing so brilliantly.

I understand where you are coz I went through that too. I was so glad to find size 28/30's that were ok that I was just grateful to have clothes that fitted. But as I have lost weight and have more shops, more choice etc I am a lot more critical of myself.

I feel silly when I do as everyone is telling me that I look great etc. But I think I just became more aware of my body and appearance whereas I wouldn't even look in a mirror !

It does go away hun, don't worry. Always try to wear clothes that fit as baggy ones make you feel worse. Take delight in your new size. Be nice to yourself !

 

[KD]

Perhaps when you were size 28, you were in a place of acceptance. Proud of the fact that you could still look good at that size.

Now your expectations have changed. Perhaps your brain is considering how much hard work you've put into this diet, and the results in the mirror aren't reflecting the effort....YET, but probably it's because your brain just hasn't caught up with itself and it's still seeing size 28.

It's all in our own heads. It's certainly not what others see.

Be proud of what you have achieved so far and enjoy every step. The scales can lie...but not 3 stones worth of fibs

 

[Podgey]

Hi Shaza..
I know just how you feel....
For me I think it's because my shape has changed so much so fast that I haven't had time to ajust at all and feel completely out of my comfort zone.. I know it sounds really daft and We should be very gratful for our weight loss. But I think it takes your head time to catch up with your body and feel comfortable in your new shell..
I think as well that because this is so hard at times and we have lost so much that I should look better than I do.... I look in the mirror and see a much smaller me but then look at other peole at work and out and about and I still have such along way to go to get the .. what I call 'normal size' look... you know when people would never believe you had ever been over weight and you wouldn't stand out in a photo type of look....

Like you I have always tried to look my best and taken a real pride in my appearence.. Guess we just have to re-learn how to make the best of ourselves....

This may sound a bit odd as well.. but I find that my once solid fatty bits ( that only wobbled slightly) have become jelly like .. Flobberdy as my 10 year old says.. For example I have never had an over hang on my trousers..(never had a waist either really but..) now I have a muffin top like effect.... Think it works a bit like a deflated balloon it gets softer and softer till it's all eventually gone....
This sort of flabby bits I like alot less than my plumped up bits before..

I am not all doomy gloomy though.. I am looking on this time in my life as a tranformation time.. rather like a catapiller and butterfly thing....
Instead of worrying what I look like at the moment I am concentrateing on how much healthier I feel and what extra things I can do that my weight stopped me doing before..
Like
No pain killers for my once dodgey knee..
putting my own socks and shoes on..
fitting in a chair with arms on in the hairdressers without cutting my cirulation off..
walkin the dog...
climing stairs with out needing to sit down to catch my breath..
going on top (if you know what I mean..sorry):giggle:

The list goes on..

Please try to be as positive as poss.. I am sending good vibes your way..:vibes:

Sorry to have rambeled on.. xxxxx

 

[SHAZA]

Hiya Shaza... first of all well done on losing 3 stone and going from a size 28 to 22.... :wow: :wow: :wow:

on not feeling too great going out last night... maybe you were just having a bad day??? I'm sure everytime you went out before you lost the weight that you felt great???

I do know that we are works in progress and sometimes it can be hard to imagine getting to the finish line but you have done amazingly well and our minds like to play tricks on us sometimes....

can you explain a bit more how you felt going out last night???

love

Hi Gen

I dont know what it is, I am just feeling very bad about myself for about 2 weeks now. Everyone keeps saying that I look amazing and doing fine but I dont feel good

I was always very confident when I get ready to go out but last night no matter how I did my hair or make up or no matter what I put on I felt horrible. Maybe just a bad day but I think I was comfy big and bubbly and now I cant really hide behind that anymore

I am a real social butterfly and go out all the time and I just need to get my head around it

Thanks for all your wicked replies ~ this site is a godsend !!!!!!

 

[Gen]

Hey Shaza... you probably were comfortable being big... but you have to now re-look at why you decided to do this diet in the first place???

I think we all use our size and fat to hide behind whether we do it on a conscious or sub-conscious level i think we all do it... but now you might have to look at doing things that you couldn't do or woudn't do when you were bigger and that in itself is scary... but do try to deal with these things as you get slimmer and you will be slim and feel great in no time!!!

love

 

[SHAZA]

Thanks for that Gen, its all part of my journey but not too happy at the moment

I am freezing cold all the time and been on my period for 3 weeks now, my feet are swollen so feeling yuky bit hormonal and dramatic

I just want my journey over ~ to be either fat or slim and not the complicated bit in the middle !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Podgey]

I just want my journey over ~ to be either fat or slim and not the complicated bit in the middle !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will second that.. You are definatly not alone on that one... pitty time travel isn't around yet then we could zip through this in a blink...

 

[SHAZA]

Hi Podgey

My wish is for time travel to zip around ~ and a zip so I can undo myself from head to toe and a new slim me immerge (bit like a butterfly) ~ thats how I have always wanted to get slim. Pity its not reality

Have you really lost 90lb since 9th January ~ how many weeks is that. You've had an amazing weight loss ~ well done you !!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Podgey]

Hi shaza...
It's been 11 weeks this week.. first 6 weeks on lioptrim then the last 5 on CD... I pinch myself everytime I think about what I have lost.. I lost 7lbs this week!

In't it great!!!!

Have to say I know it may seems like loads but when you start form were I did.. (32 1/2st) then you do have to put it into perspective a bit.. If someone who started at say 15stone, they wouldn't drop so much so quickly.. so I suppose it's all relative if you know what I mean...

Anyway.. I am loveing the loseing feeling..... may it continue on....for us all!!!!!!!!!!
stick with the plot.. Hope your feeling a bit better about your bits now... I know it is soooo hard to keep your chin up.... WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS!!!!!!!!!

 

[SHAZA]

Oh my Goodness

Well done Podgey
We can and will do this ~ which was the better diet LL or CD

You have nearly lost 7 stone in 11 weeks ~ well done you I cant believe it

 

[wannabslim]

That really is amazing podgey when you think about it- a stone a week! My mum came and handed me a pile of heavy books on Sunday and i asked her what it was- she said "thats half of how much weight you have lost so far". Bless her, she had weighed out 1 and a half stones worth of books but they were too heavy for her so she could only carry half... I never realised how much fat weighed!! And you have lost nearly 7 times that! Well done you! xx

 

[Podgey]

Hey guys... Thank you.. It's 6stone 6 i think.. so about 8lb per weekish.. (don't do maths well) so less than a stone a week.. but I wish....
You are making me all embarrassed and blussy now.. but thanks for the lovely comments....

I found LT like torture...( i know alot love it and it works just as well) I only liked the choc shake and the vanilla one with a spoon of coffe in it and they weren't that nice... I couldn't stomach the other flavours... It was a very scary decision to swop though.. I was losing weight really well and even though I hated it I didn't want that to stop.. I chanced CD and was made up.. I have an extra pack because I am 5-11' and they all taste really nice.. and you can chew things.....
Really glad I swopped.........

 

[Karen]

its incredible podgey! u must be itching to get from one weigh in to the next knowing its melting away. well done!!

as for the "feeling good" i totally agree with what Karion said. Thats exactly how it is with me. before i started CD I whizz passed full length mirrors and make sure I approach face mirrors in a certain way...head held up so only a couple of chins show instead of 12 etc. now of course...i take a much longer look and it makes me feel so so much worse. the times i try to make more effort with hair/make up (which i admit isnt often) just draws attention to the fact i look awful regardless. its much easier when i can just get washed/dressed and slap hair up in a hairband without paying much attention to the mirror ...

speaking of which....i decided to "face myself" the other day and stood naked b4 a full length mirror. mortifying! wont be doing that again in a hurry and i dont think its a coincidence that i havent let hubby touch me since lol

denial was so much easier in many ways. guess it isnt easy facing reality but needs to be done