Lovelyjoolz's Last Ever VLCD Journey

[Lovelyjoolz]

Hi all

This is not my first attempt at a VLCD. I did Cambridge in 2007 and lost 54lbs over 4 months. I cruised that 4 months and began to feel invincible. Then I took one weekend off for a work's party and a wedding thinking I could easily get back on the wagon on the Monday after. (insert forehead-slap smilie here). I didn't. I tried and tried and tried and just couldn't stay on long enough for the ketosis fairy to visit. I gave up after 5 months of repeatedly trying and now, 5 years later I'm nearly 2 stone heavier than I was before I started CD

This time is the LAST time. Money is just too tight to be throwing it away starting and stopping this diet. I am going to do this 100% until I get to my goal. I haven't quite decided what that is yet: possibly just staying on Exante until I'm light enough to run again and then switching to Slimming World or something like that. That's my problem you see, I'm stuck in a spiral of being too big to exercise enough to make a difference - my arthritis just won't let me. And without moving more I just can't shift the weight. I've tried, believe me I've tried. I even trained up and did the Race for Life last year. Walking, of course, not running. But I completed it (and then spent a week in agony with my knees and hips!). I went from zero exercise to walking 2-3 miles every weekend and did I loose any weight? Did I b*ggery. I even saw a nutritionist who told me that the reason I wasn't loosing weight was that I wasn't eating ENOUGH! Helloooooooooo??? Really?? Found that hard to believe. If I'm eating enough to GAIN weight, how can I be not eating enough???

The way I see it, my metabolism is royally screwed up from years of yo-yo dieting, episodes of bullimia and yes, even a period in my late teens of anorexia. I was 3 stone UNDERweight, if you can believe that.

So, here I am. 38 (nearly 39) and 306 pounds. I should be no more than 168 pounds for my height. And I really truly feel that VLCD is the only thing that is going to work for me.

Tuesday 6th March 2012 - Day One.

Strawberry shake for breakfast. Didn't taste of anything much, which is fine. Just get it down to stave off the hunger and forget about it until lunchtime. Which is now. And I've just had the banana shake for lunch: pleasantly surprised. I was really nice! Less cloyingly sweet than the CD banana, but would have been better with icy cold water.

Almost two litres of water down the hatch already. And two black coffees (euch! I miss tea desperately already).

Come on!!!! I can bloody do this!!!! Can someone knock me out and wake me when I'm in ketosis??

Off for my gazzillionth pee of the day now....*slosh slosh slosh*

 

[angel-missy]

Hi Joolz and welcome I wish you success in achieving your goal weight. I'm sure you can do it - you did really well before so you know it will work. I too lost a fair bit on CD a couple of years ago. I managed to maintain for the past 2 years by going low carb. At first it was strange to think I may never eat pasta or cake again but I can honestly say that it is totally worth giving up to keep the weight off with little effort.

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

Oh wow - you are amazing! Very inspirational.

At the moment I cannot imagine life without cake - I bake as a hobby (although not right now of course!) - but this diet does strange things to your head so who knows how will feel about cake when I reach the end of my journey!

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

7th March 2012 - Day Two

So I was pleasantly surprised last night - it wasn't as hard as I had built it up to be! I managed to hold off on my last shake until 8pm, when OH ate his dinner. And, bless him, he knows how the smell of vinegar makes me gag so he smothered his dinner in it so that I wouldn't be tempted to pinch a chip off his plate!!! Gotta love him. We'll see how long that lasts - VLCD grumps + TOTM next week? Lord help him!

Had the vanilla shake and I was dreading it - thought it would be awful but is was actually delicious. Me tre tre impressed.

I thought I was going to fall asleep on the sofa before 9pm but I managed to stay up to watch Big Fat Gypsy Weddings (the shame!) and crawled off to bed at 10pm, lulled to sleep by the rumblings of my tummy

Choc shake for brekkie (yuck!) and so far I've only got the mildest of headaches and low level tummy rumblings. THis seems a little too good to be true...

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

I was thinking last night, about how life has to be put on hold to a certain extent when following this diet, and I was getting a little grumpy about it. And it was then i suddenly realised the bleeding obvious -

My life has been on hold for the past 13 years - why should I worry about a few months more???

There are so many things that I've wanted to do but haven't because of my weight. And I'm not talking about the big things, like parachute jumps and such; it's the small things that make life fun.

I've avoided going to the beauty salon for a facial, spray tan or massage, purely because I think the therapist will judge me because of my weight. I've never had my make-up done at a department store counter for the same reason. I won't go to the hairdresser because I can't stand to look at my fat face in their mirrors and because I worry that the hydraulic chairs won't take my weight! I've never learned to scuba dive - something I've longed to do for years - because I'm terrified I'll be told that their is no such thing as a wetsuit that would fit me. I gave up rollercoasters and funfairs despite loving them because I'm scared that I'll get stuck in the seat. I've turned down fabulous free holidays at friends villas because I'm too ashamed to wear a swimsuit in front of them. There are endless things that I've avoided/missed out one because of my weight.

OK, so these are not life-changing things, but they are things that 'normal' people enjoy without thinking.

It's time I stopped "waiting until I'm thin" and got busy doing something about it.

I promise myself that 2012 is the year I take my life off hold!

 

[angel-missy]

Lovelyjoolz, I agree - feeling bad about yourself is much worse than giving up the things that put you in that position. Doing vlcd and giving up carbs has brought me so much freedom that I never had before
Life is so much more comfortable now I am a normal weight and that's worth so much more than eating those things. Be nice to yourself - if you can't face the hairdresser yet even just buying a new perfume and wearing it every day will make you feel better. Even small non food treats help - a new nail polish or lipstick every week will perk you up. And book yourself in at the beauticians as soon as you feel able because you deserve to feel special. Good luck with this - you can do it

 

[Bellerine]

Hi LJ. I feel your determination dripping off the page. You can take your life off hold. You deserve to have a full life, to live your dreams. Dont accept second best. Im right there with you, taking it day by day til i can say that Ive conquered this demon thats been strangling me. Im fighting back.

Hold tight to your strength over the next few days. You know it gets sooo much easier.

Belle

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

Thanks for those kind words angel - I really appreciate it. I'm so envious that you are at your goal, but on the other hand I'm looking forward to my own journey Your post made me so excited tho - I cant wait to meet the woman I'll be at the end of this year!

I have promised myself something from the Dior counter if I stay 100% for a fortnight - hopefully that will help keep me on track!

When I'd lost 2 stone or so on CD I found that I wanted to make more of an effort with my appearance. Doing my hair each day, accesorising etc etc. Don't get me wrong - my make-up is ALWAYS on (I'm a cosmetics junkie ) but I so often find myself thinking "I look like crap anyway, so why bother". I'm really looking forwarded to feeling more confident and enjoying clothes again!

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

Wow. Thank you Belle - fab words, put a HUGE smile on my face!

You are so right - it's time we took a stand. This flab is no longer going to be allowed to stop me enjoying life!!

Edit: Hope you don't mind, but I'm going to quote you on my signature!

 

[angel-missy]

Thanks for those kind words angel - I really appreciate it. I'm so envious that you are at your goal, but on the other hand I'm looking forward to my own journey Your post made me so excited tho - I cant wait to meet the woman I'll be at the end of this year!

I have promised myself something from the Dior counter if I stay 100% for a fortnight - hopefully that will help keep me on track!

When I'd lost 2 stone or so on CD I found that I wanted to make more of an effort with my appearance. Doing my hair each day, accesorising etc etc. Don't get me wrong - my make-up is ALWAYS on (I'm a cosmetics junkie ) but I so often find myself thinking "I look like crap anyway, so why bother". I'm really looking forwarded to feeling more confident and enjoying clothes again!

I'm glad you've already got something nice picked out It does help if you can have something to look forward to doesn't it? And all your lovely clothes you'll be able to get back into!
I'm not at goal yet - reached my first goal with CD a couple of years back and at the time felt skinny at 12st 7 as I'd started out at about 15st7... Decided beginning Feb that I'd like to get another 3st off and knowing how quickly that can be done on vlcd I'm back! Just 2st to go now

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

Well you look fabulous now, so how amazing are you going to look when you get to your new goal? Lucky lady!

 

[angel-missy]

Thank you, can't wait to get there
Hope you're having a good day x

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

*waves* Morning all!

8th March 2012 - Day three

11am and 2 litres + 1 shake down.

Feeling a bit rough today. Still hungry because the ketosis fairy is taking her sweet time getting here, damn her! Generally feeling a bit tired and weak. my muscles in my neck and shoulders ache with the slightest of exertion. Soooooo looking forward to the energy that ketosis brings!

Last night was rough. I was absolutely starving - my tummy was grumbling so loud. My OH found it hilarious but my poor scaredy-cat Bertie was so startled by a particularly loud grumble that he flew off my lap and hid behind the sofa!!!

If ketosis doesn't kick in soon I might consider switching to WS. It would be better than caving completely.

Another disconcerting thing (and sorry if this is TMI!) is that I haven't had a poo since Monday It can't be dehydration because I'm having 4 litres + coffee + 3 shakes each day. Surely SOMETHING must be moving????

Hope you all have fantastic days xxxxxx

 

[Bellerine]

Wow LJ. HUGELY HONOURED. You know that you said all that. Read your first few posts. Those are YOUR ideas and words. You can edit my name off the signature you know.

And DIOR!! Im going to have to come up with a reward schedule for myself if you all are doing it. At the mo my reward is watching the local triathlon team train every fri morn at the pool. Im happily married but, um, that doesnt stop me looking!!!

Belle

 

[Bellerine]

Ketosis is coming. Its nearly here. The rumbly stomach is its herald. Just hold on a little longer. Anyhoo Working solution is way HARDER. All those decisions about what to eat......

Belle

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

At the mo my reward is watching the local triathlon team train every fri morn at the pool. Im happily married but, um, that doesnt stop me looking!!!

Belle

This made me laugh! Nothing like a good letch to get the blood pumping eh? And raising your heart rate helps burn calories so really, you could claim to only be looking for heath reasons....

I guess they are my words, sort of, but the way you put that together really struck me. It gave me a real boost, so it has to stay there to give me the same kick every day!

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

Friday 9th March 2012 - Day Four

Day four and I'm still sooooooooo hungry! Ketosis is taking it's time and I'm not happy about it.

It's lunchtime and someone has bought raspberry donuts. They are in the kitchen, but I can hear them calling me from here. I dare not have a hot drink this afternoon, because if I do go in the kitchen there's a bloody good chance I'll cave. Yesterday, someone was eating a satsuma and I was so tempted to snatch it out of his hand!!

I'm just about to finish off my 2nd litre of water for the day and I had one pack for breakfast at 7:30. Trying to hold out as long as possible for the next pack so that I'm not too hungry going home. I have to drive past a Burger King, a KFC and a McDonalds, not to mention the Subway, Chinese and chippys! Cardiff has a LOT of takeaways!

I could murder a steak. I've been having fantasties about steak and egg since yesterday afternoon And for some reason I watched Man v Food last night and ended up wanting to fly to Atlanta for a burger!

Oh, gotta pee - only the 3rd time today though, so that it clearly slowing down. Can someone message the ketosis fairy and tell her she's running late???

 

[Bellerine]

Hi LJ. Oh dear. You are going through the worst of it. I PROMISE it will end v soon. V v soon. In v difficult moments I've started tricking myself by telling myself that i can eat anything i want. But then i CHOOSE not to. it seems to make it easier than all the negative"cant" and "dont" talk. I too live in "take away land". There seems to one around every corner. And the chinese send me a christmas card every year. They may not survive the recession if they lose my business!


Take away food won't nourish you. You deserve better. Drive on by..

Belle

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

Thanks Belle, I love the idea of 'choosing' to be good. I guess it goes with all the other ways we are taking control of our life.

Sorry to hear about the poor Chinese's misfortune! I think I might say the same about our, because it doubles as a chip shop and therefore is loosing double the amount of custom!!

Oh, and another fantastic quote from you (I think I should start keeping a book ):

Take away food won't nourish you. You deserve better. Drive on by..

Excellent. I'm going to use that as my mantra to get me through the next few weeks

 

[Lovelyjoolz]

First week weigh-in!!!

OK, so my official weigh in isn't supposed to be until tomorrow morning, but I'd just had an appointment with the nurse and she weighed me as well as taking my blood pressure.

And the result?

I'VE LOST A STONE!!!! :bliss:

YEEEEEEHAWWWW!!!!

Go me! Go me!

And, also as impressive, my blood pressure is down too, to 119/82. Which is pretty damn near perfect. Good Day today!!!