My new thread, my new me

[Elie]

Hello everyone, I am a WeMITTS too, and I lost quite a lot of weight with CD, being a 100% into it, and then had to stop for financial reasons.
But I am back on board now (not that the financial side of my life is much better :cry but I want to badly this time.
I will try to post as often as possible. I warn you in advance: I am a right moaner and I drool over food all the time although I have a lot of willpower when I really want something .
I am starting tomorrow, today being my "last meal" day (it makes it sound like some biblical event, haha). I shall have a nice homecooked meal tonight and then...
As I have already said, I already know CD quite well, but I know that it will be harder this time round, as my body (and mind!) will remember the ordeal . But who is in control? ME
As for my reasons to lose weight...Well, I am quite a vain person, and yes, one of my reasons is that I want to be prettier. I don't wanna be a model, I just want to be average and be able to buy clothes I LIKE, and not clothes that can only fit me . But I think it goes deeper than this: I want to feel good about myself and be confident, and I know that, as far as I am concerned, I can;t feel like this while I am this fat.
But the main reason is that I am so afraid of dying or being seriously ill because of my obesity...:cry:I feel like I am ruining my life by ruining my body and my self confidence that way.

My 1st goal is to go back to the weight I was when I stopped and then to be healthy again, trying to listen to my body and its REAL needs (ie not comfort eating )

Oh, and this site rocks. I spent a long time on it when I was dieting the last time, and everythime I felt like giving up and eating carrot, you people were amazing

Long live minimins

Elie

 

[Elie]

Hello everyone!
So it is the first day (last night's meal was really good btw ) but I am not really sad -for now- to leave food behind. It is more a prison to me than anthing else, so good riddance

I am ashamed to say I am still in bed, and I haven't had any shake or water yet, but I have to go back to the same little routine I had the 1st time.

The water will be the hardest, as well as forcing myself drink a shake in the morning. I cannot eat in the morning, but I know that I need the necessary vitamins when I am on this diet, so I have to force myself. :sigh: If at least someone could blend it for me, it wouldn't be that bad

I am also preparing myself for the comments at work. I don't want people to know I am on CD, so it is hard to hide the fact that you are not eating. I am a teacher, and the only time of day when you can have a chat with your colleagues is at lunchtime in the staffroom :sigh:. I will hide away in the computer suite, writing my reports etc then .

Later today, I have a mountain of work to do, so hopefully it should occupy my mind. And I shall chat onlin with my little goddaughter who, no doubt, will have plenty of things to tell me about her week at school

Laterz

 

[loved-up]

Hi Elie

So how has your first day been?

I totally know what you mean about food being like a prison, for some strange reason I do feel a lot 'safer' when I'm doing ss

If you're worried about people realising what your doing I would highly reccomend the porrige....just looks like your eating 'normal' but sensible food

Well done on getting back onto your journey, you sound so determined I'm sure you'll be where you want to be before you know it

 

[Elie]

Thank you loved up

My 1st day went well and then got very hungry during the night. But it is al forgotten now, because I am playing like a child in the snow . This tells me that my food cravings are really due to my mind not being occupied enough

I still find it hard to drink the water though, no matter how much tea I drink!

I will try the porridge idea! I just don't want people to know that I am on a VLCD because they get very aggressive for some reason.

It is still snowing hard here. I spent ages waiting for a bus to go to school (I am a teacher) to be told that there were no buses. Then I thought I could walk (it is about an hour long by foot). I was about to go, dreading the journey with so few calories when the school called me to tell me they were closing. Phew. So I did a snowman and now I am back working on a project for my students. I love working from home . Tut tut, lazy teacher on this thread . My year 11 won't be pleased though, because I can still prepare their test from home, ha

Anyway, I am starting to get rid of my prison. I can't wait to see how much I have lost next Saturday

Elie

 

[Jim]

today being my "last meal" day (it makes it sound like some biblical event, haha).

or a hanging

 

[Elie]

Haha, indeed!

 

[Elie]

Well, another has gone. I was ok food wise, I wasn't too obsessed

I am still struggling with my water and can't wait for week 3 so that I can have the water flavouring . I still manage the minimum amount of water but ugh. I wish I didn't have to drink so much Oh, haven't I told you before? I'm a moaner

It is another rainbow for me today, as I am going to bed so, unles I sleepeat, I should be fine there

Though I am not sure I shall be able to sleep. BF and I just watched Underworld 2, and it scared me so much Why do I kep watching film like that? The gory side of it really made me forget any desire for food

Good night everyone. We are a day closer to our goal

 

[loved-up]

Hey Elie

Just wanted to say a big well done on your latest rainbow, your posts are going to look fabulous with so many rainbows on

Another day closer babe, we're well into our journeys now:flowers:

 

[Jim]

The water is hard at first isn't it. I'm OK with it now, drink at least 8 pints a day, but it was so hard at first. Once you understand that you need water to burn fat it gets easier.

 

[Elie]

I think I will try to have small bottles instaed of one big ones, as it will lok less daunting during the day. If have at least half a pint of water every hour I am awake, then I should fine.

Thanks for your help Jim

Thanks loved-up for your kind message. I am not sure my signature will be able to contain all the rainbows I am gong to achieve . Ok, I am bragging a bit

Another nice day today. The sun is shining but roads are very icy. Work is closed today, but I have enough work to keep me occupied at home

Ok, I need to start drinking :sigh:

Elie

 

[Jim]

I am not sure my signature will be able to contain all the rainbows I am gong to achieve

Now that's what I call attitude, go for it hun.

 

[Elie]

Well people, it is the end of another day for me, and another rainbow to go with it

I know it is early to go to bed, but I am not tempted by food or obsessed with it when I am in bed. So I think I shall finish "The Lost World" tonight (and probably have nightmares about dinosaurs).

I am back to work tomorrow, but still don't know what I shall be doing as apparently, they changed the timetable to try to catch up with the work we have missed because of our 2 snow days: I love how well organised it all is

Good night fellower dieters

Elie xoxo

 

[Jim]

OOOOHHHHHHHH 4 rainbows, nice one elie.

 

[Elie]

Hey, thanks Jim

I am confident I will add another one tonight although I have to say this is one of these moments where I would LOVE to comfort eat.

I am alone tonight as BF got called to work at the last minute (p/t job, as he is a student). Apprently, his manager TEXTED him yesterday about going to work today. BF never received the text so was told off my manager. But which kind of manager TEXTS an employee when there is a last minute need for more staff? For crying out loud, he could have called, he must know that texts are unreliable! Anyway, now BF has to work till late 8pm and then he will need more time to commute back home. I am hungry, I have a headache although I have drunk all my water already. And I am already thinking of my 2 double Year 11 classes tomorow. Elie is feeling a bit sorry for herself

It was so hard to be back at work. Indeed, it was my colleague's birthday and she was insistant that I take a chocolate. I had to come up with an excuse so I said I had to be careful with my sugar level, haha (which may be true, I don't know anything about my sugar level ). But it was HARD. People kept offering me food, and students wanted to share biscuits while we were doing independent study

BUT I FOUGHT the temptation.

I think I have lost quite a lot of weight. At the moment I don't weigh myself, I just check my fat % on the scales and it goes down, down, down which means that I am losing fat, and not just water or lean muscle (or so my GP explained it to me once).

More to come later. I am sorry for all the mistake. I know it is a shame that a teacher can't write better English, but to my defence, English is not my 1st language, so I hope you will excuse my poor grammar

Elie

 

[Jim]

are your clothes fitting looser as well ellie?

 

[Elie]

Yes they are, that's why I'm thinking I must have lost a fair bit of fat

Hope I am not wrong

Elie

 

[Jim]

Don't see how you can be elie, if your clothes are loose then something is happening isn't it.

 

[Elie]

Hi gang

Another day at work has gone without cheating. At home I know I won't because I can read or listen to music to stop thinking about food. Although it does not always work as some ruddy writers insist on desbring mealtimes at every chapter, argh

Of course at work, I have plenty of things to keep my mind busy, but I am feeling really weak. Teaching can be quite a physical job, although it may not seem like it. I am always on my feet, walking amongst the students (oh the days when teachers just sat at their desk ) and talking all the time (it makes me light headed ). At least at home, I can sit down and relax. But I know I will feel better soon, as my body is still adjusting to the change!

I am almost finished with my water for today. The more I drink, the less tired I am, so I drink drink drink

I can't wait for tonight as I am sure again that I will add another rainbow

Off to prepare a nice chocolate shake

Laterz

Elie

 

[Jim]

A day at a time elie.

 

[Elie]

Thanks Jim

This is what I keep telling myself when I feel all weak.

I wonder what I will look like this summer though... You know, I really hope that the diet will work, or rather that I will let the diet work. So it means that in 6 months time I will have changed physically, but I can't see myself other than obese . I wasn't when I was young, so I still look at my pics from when I was 18 (twas only 7 years ago, but it seems like ages!) and I wonder how it will feel to be like that again... Being able to run and not break a sweat as soon as I walk, not being breathless all the time. Being full of energy. And as a woman, I am also really interested in clothes and all that, so I am wondering how it will be to be able to buy clothes because they are nice and suit me and not because they are they only ones that I could find that could fit. So many questions that will be answered in 6 months time. I just hope I won't be disappointed But what I really want is to get out of the Obese BMI range. When I do, I will be sooooo happy. And I KNOW that it will happen