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Quite worried.

#1
About three months ago I found a hard lump on my breast. Its wasnt much so I put it down to w8 loss and my peroid after just having got the coil in. Today my fella finaly lost the rag and he made me see the doctor.
She said theres something there and booked me in for a ulrascan and a neddle (WTF!!) biopsy. She said its to be done asap so I go into hosptal on wed (hopefuly, she said )
Also it may have been there for quite a while and my "weight" was masking it.
For the past god know how long all i have been thinking about is my w8. All my thoughts, my w8 making me feel bad and good. Happy or sad, comsumed by what i ****ing weigh.
I may have risked catching a lump in my breast early due to greed and vanity.
Im 25 years old. I have a little 6yo boy that needs me.
All this time ive spent worried about what a scale says, I could of been with my little fella or my hubby living my life.
Instead im alwAYS on about my body. My bellys to fat, my face is fat, my boobs are saggy. at least i have two boobs.
Sometimes i feel like i am a waste of space. Why cant i just love and respect what I have? Why cant I be happy with what ive got?
 
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#2
stop blaming yourself

Please stop for a minute. You must be highly emotional finding that lump its a womans worst nightmare. You have done the right thing now, don't blame yourself for any of this. There is nothing you can change about it. Just look to what you can change for your future. Get this biopsy out of the way, the majority are false alarms and if the news is worse then there are many things that can be done. Regardless of creed colour shape or wealth its human nature to want more than you currently have. If we were all happy with what life dealt is then there would be an end to evolution. Please stop beating yourself up. Get this test and see what the future holds. Let us know how it goes and if you want to drop me a line then feel free. Often its easier to discuss things with a stranger. Good luck and take care regardless of the result. Clare x
 
#3
Ok deep breaths hun. Yes it's every womans worst nightmare, and thank god your fella got you to go to the docs. There is no point in living your life in *what ifs*, it just brings you down pet, and you don't need that just now. Take each day as it comes, and deal with it head on, it sounds like your other half is very supportive of you, so lean on him! That's what he's there for. You're scared, of course you are, but you are by no means alone. Keep posting here, because as peachy says, its often easier to discuss things with strangers.
Hang in there hun
ali xxx

 


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