Donnalou86
Striving for slimness
Hello all, am really struggling. I've just been feeling so so down the last couple of days and I really cant explain why. It just all came to a head when I was at my OH parents house and his mam made a totally innocent comment about me not being a 'girly girl' type. I went straight home and I've cried my eyes out in the shower. Then phoned my OH and cried my eyes out to him. This sounds ridiculous even as I'm writing it becasue I cant pinpoint what's wrong with me. I feel ugly and still fat but I am struggling so much with this diet now I'm miserable. I dont know why that is either because I've found it so easy for the whole 16 weeks I've been doing it. Havent been tempted to cheat once, have cooked food for family and for my job. Have felt grat about myself. But I dont know, since I started development and its up to me when I finish I've been dying for the end, dying to start RTM. This week particularly I've been so tempted to cheat, and a lack of the packs I like from my LLC has made things even harder. I've been snapping at my OH, my family, been so tired all the time not wanting to leave my room and not wanting to go to work, go to see people. Only sitting with my laptop on here, have even mad emy best friend angry at me cos I snapped at her when she came to visit and I had to come downstairs to see her.
I've also found out that LL got my height wrong, when I got measured by the nurse this week she said I am actually 5'6 not 5'5. I worked it out that this meant I would be just in my healthy BMI at 11st 0 and its tempted me to make my goal weight higher again! I feel guilty doing it, like I'm copping out and not sticking it as far as I could but I'm so desperate I have to do something. I'm such a happy person normally and I've never felt this low. Sorry if I'm rambling on :cry::cry:
I've also found out that LL got my height wrong, when I got measured by the nurse this week she said I am actually 5'6 not 5'5. I worked it out that this meant I would be just in my healthy BMI at 11st 0 and its tempted me to make my goal weight higher again! I feel guilty doing it, like I'm copping out and not sticking it as far as I could but I'm so desperate I have to do something. I'm such a happy person normally and I've never felt this low. Sorry if I'm rambling on :cry::cry: