Blonde Logic
Yes. You can.
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD MORING MINIMINS!!!!!!!!!!
Hi
Just had some coffee - can you tell?
Well. I had a great evening last night.
I went to the gym, got my replacement membership card. I then went to the pool and swam laps for 30 minutes.
What really bears mentioning, is that I went out, in public, in daylight, in SHORTS! And ya know what? No one passed out, fell over, got sick, chased me out of town with pitchforks - and I did not have one moment of feeling embaressed or self conscious!
Then at the pool, I walked out to the pool in my swimsuit, not a robe or wrapped in a towel, and, not with my head down! I walked the entire length of the pool to the far end to get in rather then jumping in at the very first opportunity! It felt amazing! Absolutely amazing!! I just didn't care what wnyone thuoght if they even thought anything. I just felt confidant, and normal.
I felt so good when I got in the car, that i cried. I just can't believe, that after struggling with weight since 1985, that I am behaving in the way I was always envious of others - and never ever thought would be me.
Granted, I have a lot of toning to do before its a gorgeous bod - but the important peice of this, is that I am not bothered, as I am now. I feel so good about myself, that a few wobbly bits exposed to the public does not even cause my the slightest downward shameful glance.
It's all sinking in. I. AM. NORMAL.
<shakes head in wonderment>
I can feel, there are going to be a lot of emotions shed in the coming weeks as this reality continues to bed in. All those painful years - the shame, the self-hate, the feelings of failure- that good life was only for the slim, all those horrible feelings - they are gone.
I feel like I have just got word that I have been cured, of some lifelong disease.
Its wonderful.
Well - wow! Theres an hour x hour starter, ay????
Have a great day peeps!!!!! We are ALL getting better and better everyday and soon will be the best we have ever ever been!!!
xx
Hi
Just had some coffee - can you tell?
Well. I had a great evening last night.
I went to the gym, got my replacement membership card. I then went to the pool and swam laps for 30 minutes.
What really bears mentioning, is that I went out, in public, in daylight, in SHORTS! And ya know what? No one passed out, fell over, got sick, chased me out of town with pitchforks - and I did not have one moment of feeling embaressed or self conscious!
Then at the pool, I walked out to the pool in my swimsuit, not a robe or wrapped in a towel, and, not with my head down! I walked the entire length of the pool to the far end to get in rather then jumping in at the very first opportunity! It felt amazing! Absolutely amazing!! I just didn't care what wnyone thuoght if they even thought anything. I just felt confidant, and normal.
I felt so good when I got in the car, that i cried. I just can't believe, that after struggling with weight since 1985, that I am behaving in the way I was always envious of others - and never ever thought would be me.
Granted, I have a lot of toning to do before its a gorgeous bod - but the important peice of this, is that I am not bothered, as I am now. I feel so good about myself, that a few wobbly bits exposed to the public does not even cause my the slightest downward shameful glance.
It's all sinking in. I. AM. NORMAL.
<shakes head in wonderment>
I can feel, there are going to be a lot of emotions shed in the coming weeks as this reality continues to bed in. All those painful years - the shame, the self-hate, the feelings of failure- that good life was only for the slim, all those horrible feelings - they are gone.
I feel like I have just got word that I have been cured, of some lifelong disease.
Its wonderful.
Well - wow! Theres an hour x hour starter, ay????
Have a great day peeps!!!!! We are ALL getting better and better everyday and soon will be the best we have ever ever been!!!
xx