Short but sweet - I really do mean it this time

beccus

beccus

Full Member
Hi All

My name is Becca, I turned 30 this year and at my biggest I weighed 20 stone, over twice what my healthy BMI says I should be, I'm 5 ft 3. I've been a big girl all my life, in fact, I don't remember not being fat, there are pictures, but I just can't keep it in my head.

I think for a long while I just didn't think about my weight, I was happy, loved, had a great group of friends, and dammit - I'm funny! I'm the fat girl cliche. It's not that I thought I was skinny, it just didn't register. But then it did, and boy did it. I went to weight watchers with some friends and tipped the scales at 20 stone, I was in my early 20's and I worked hard to get almost 3 stone off, which I piled back on after a run in with depression and a lot of "oh sod it!" conversations with myself.

But now I'm back and I am determined to do this! I am doing the dukan diet (I've been lurking over there and have a diary too), I need to lose this weight now, or I never will, I want to live a long and healthy life, I don't want to be a fat mum (if we go down the kids route) and I don't want to keep having to shop in the fat shop.

I'm getting on really well with dukan actually, I've been going 6 weeks, I've shifted a stone and half and have just shy of 50 lb to go before I hit my "true weight" - but that means I will still be classed as overweight, being vertically challenged and all. I don't know what I am going to do at that point, but that is my first big goal.

And you guys know what I'm talking about, having read some of the posts that have gone before me I recognise your stories, cos they are my own. So, if you'll have me, I'd love to join you all on this awesomely tough, but totally worth it journey.
 
good look on your journey any help you need you will get here good luck on your weight loss journey xxxx
 
you will do it and good luck xxx
 
beccus i wish i was feeling like you today horrid day lets hope tomorrow better hey ho here we go brush myself down and off again x x
 
Hey Chezz, you feeling any better today?
I've had some seriously rubbish days recently, but as you say, pick yourself up, dust yourself down and keep on keeping on! Remember how far you've come and why you are doing it! That is what keeps me going, and awesome people like you guys.

Big hugs all round x
 
A few of us found the big 30 as a time to change. I turned 30 earlier this year and I decided it was time to take action last year. Sounds like you are doing really well. I know what you mean about the depression and oh sod it when you put it back on. I lost 5 stone on a real fad diet then stopped it started to creep back up. And as it did I was depressed and thought ******** if I eat this so what, I will be overweight well I already am. So I totally get that.
You have a fantastic positive attitude which isn't easy on this journey so well done.
 
Thanks Marie, I'm not always so positive, but I feel different this time, I don't quite know what it is, but I'm running with it (well, walking is a better analogy!).
I feel so privileged to have found such a positive, supportive group of people to share the journey... without meaning to be skinny-ist, my thin friends are wonderful, but they don't GET the battle that is my weight loss journey. They might whinge about a few pounds here and there, but when it's stones plural they just can't fathom it and I'm not about to try and explain it. I just can't.

And it isn't their fault either, when you spend your life making the fat jokes in order to take control of the situation you can't be upset when someone else says anything, but of course you are. I'm forever poking fun at myself, but my god it hurts when someone else does it. I used to dye my hair pink, in order to try and be remembered as the girl with the pink hair rather than the fat girl.

The things we do huh?
 
I know what you mean. I thought I was the only person in the world my size, in fact it stopped me from doing something about it. Then I came here and realised I wasn't alone and others can and did do it after being my size. Like you I made fat jokes and pretended not to care when they were made but the fact is I did care and it hurt a lot. With the negative steroptypes attached to fat people and it being an accepted prejudice in our society it doesn't help.

And your right you have to have been there to understand what it is like to have a lot to lose, people don't know how mentally and physically hard it is to do when you have more to lose. Just how hard it is making a lifestyle change or how scary it is. Losing a few pounds doesn't take too long, losing a few stone is a battle and its not easy. It can be done but wont happen overnight and the whole time you have to stay motivated, while your body screams for the old lifestyle it as used too.
This place has been fantastic for me and those who totally get it. I am glad you are seeing it too, defiantly helps me stay on track.
 
beccus said:
And thanks Beth! (One of my favourite names btw!)
I'm feeling determined to get there, people here are so nice, and it's inspiring!

x
Click to expand...

does that mean i'm your favourite person too? ;-) ye, so many lovely and supportive people here. we can do it and we will get there! bx
 
beccus said:
You are really inspiring Marie! Thank you, I can see you've done phenomenally well! How are you feeling?
x
Click to expand...

Today has not been too bad. I had weigh in and lost a couple of pounds so that's good. A few things coming up which are definatly going to test the willpower. How are you getting on now?
 
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