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Sisters!

HPSaucy

Will get there one day!
S: 17st8lb C: 14st8.5lb Loss: 2st13.5lb(16.87%)
#1
I saw my sister yesterday for the first time since March, everyone else has said they can notice my weight loss but did she say anything? No!

I thought maybe she hadn't noticed but from sly things she did I knew she had, she had bought loads and loads of pork scratchings down with her, I did used to like them but she kept waving them under my nose and saying "you know you want to" this went on for awhile until my Mum told her to stop teasing me.

She then went and got a box of chocolates, everyone was eating them except for me, kept offering them and I said no, so where did she put the box? Not near everyone else, she put them on the table in front of me, I just ignored them and then mum told her to move them.

I'm trying so hard to make this work for me, I've really tried to turn my life around but everything I do she poo poo's, for example I finished Couch to 5K and have joined a gym, all she done was slag it off. Had a healthy option meal at restaurant and she said it was boring!

I'm sure she's jealous as we've always been the same size and now I've lost 2 stone (almost), in the past I've always let negativity get in my way and sabotage my diet and I was so weak willed I would have just eaten the crap but now I'm determined to succeed.

Sorry I just had to rant as you think those you love should be the most supportive, my hubby and Mum are but Dad and sister not at all.

Although in Dad's defensive even though in front of everyone he said "I don't like gyms, they're full of unfit people like you!", 5 mins later when we were on our own he said "you're looking trimmer", problem is I didn't know how to take the compliment so shrugged it off!
 
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GothGoddess

Time to start again!
#2
My sister has always been too thin, she is five ft 10 and about a size 8 never had to diet etc ( I always thought she was picked up out of the wrong crib at the maternity wing ) as the others are all chunky like me... I have only lost nine pounds, but you can tell I know it... All I got from her when I saw her last was " you've left it a bit late to start worrying how you look in clothes haven't you?" And the classic " thought being weird meant you get to hide in black shapeless stuff, or tuck it all in a corset"... I am of the same opinion as you with your sister, jealous, just write it off as that and be proud of what you have achieved... In fact feel a little sorry for her that she can't share your joy... xx

Sent from my HTC Wildfire using MiniMins
 

sweet pink

is losing for shoes
S: 19st13lb C: 13st0lb G: 11st10lb BMI: 27.7 Loss: 6st13lb(34.77%)
#3
It does sound like jealousy to me too unfortunately but maybe she is hoping that you will fail so that she won't be seen as the 'bigger' sister. I'm not making excuses for her as tempting you with food was extremely unfair & well done to you for staying so strong. I have been in a similar situation myself but guess what... now my family are following SW on the quiet!!!
 
#4
Hi hun. I think your sister is def a little jealous & tbh, i kinda get why! In every family people have their roles (clever one, sensible one, strong one, fat one) and you have made an effort to not be that person anymore. Its often the case that family members struggle when you decide not to be who you've always been - it messes with how they see the world & can effect the balance within a family grouping, and it usually manifests itself as jealousy.

Just try to remember that she loves you, and in time will adjust to the new you x
 

HPSaucy

Will get there one day!
S: 17st8lb C: 14st8.5lb Loss: 2st13.5lb(16.87%)
#5
Thanks you two, think I just needed to hear it from someone else and wasn't me going mad!

Your message about the crib at the hospital made me giggle lol! X
 

GothGoddess

Time to start again!
#6
HPSaucy said:
Thanks you two, think I just needed to hear it from someone else and wasn't me going mad!

Your message about the crib at the hospital made me giggle lol! X
Me and my Dad always used to say that Mum must have picked someone's Italian baby by mistake, as she quite dark skinned compared to all the rest being pale... Lol... xx

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Lucky7

Gold Member
S: 10st4lb C: 10st4lb G: 9st7lb BMI: 27.2 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
#7
And I suppose up til now you have backed up the 'can't help it because it's genetic' theory by being the same size. You've kind of swept that away haven't you. You never know though, once she's got over it a bit, maybe she can look to you for advice and inspiration of how to get trim and fit herself xx
 

Maximus

Gold Member
S: 17st7lb C: 10st10lb G: 10st5lb BMI: 24.2 Loss: 6st11lb(38.78%)
#8
I saw my sister yesterday for the first time since March, everyone else has said they can notice my weight loss but did she say anything? No!

I thought maybe she hadn't noticed but from sly things she did I knew she had, she had bought loads and loads of pork scratchings down with her, I did used to like them but she kept waving them under my nose and saying "you know you want to" this went on for awhile until my Mum told her to stop teasing me.

She then went and got a box of chocolates, everyone was eating them except for me, kept offering them and I said no, so where did she put the box? Not near everyone else, she put them on the table in front of me, I just ignored them and then mum told her to move them.

I'm trying so hard to make this work for me, I've really tried to turn my life around but everything I do she poo poo's, for example I finished Couch to 5K and have joined a gym, all she done was slag it off. Had a healthy option meal at restaurant and she said it was boring!

I'm sure she's jealous as we've always been the same size and now I've lost 2 stone (almost), in the past I've always let negativity get in my way and sabotage my diet and I was so weak willed I would have just eaten the crap but now I'm determined to succeed.

Sorry I just had to rant as you think those you love should be the most supportive, my hubby and Mum are but Dad and sister not at all.

Although in Dad's defensive even though in front of everyone he said "I don't like gyms, they're full of unfit people like you!", 5 mins later when we were on our own he said "you're looking trimmer", problem is I didn't know how to take the compliment so shrugged it off!
First of all, rise above it, and continue to do so.

You have ALL the power here, and she cannot handle it - simple as that. Although an unusual one, this is most definitely a non-scale victory (NSV).

Continue to hold the moral high ground and eventually she will accept it, or even embrace it and do it herself.

Well done!

Steve
 

Shrimpy

Gold Member
S: 13st6lb C: 8st12lb G: 8st11lb BMI: 24.2 Loss: 4st8lb(34.04%)
#9
My sis was like that too, I saw her the time before last when I had dropped from a 18 to a 14 and she said that it was good we were the same size (she's a 20)... Then last time I saw her I had almost reached target and was a size 8 and she said absolutely nothing. Not one single comment. I just let it slide, cause we (you and I) have the power, we're the ones who are making this change for US, not them. Though, it does make me a teeny bit smug when I can honestly say I'm the littlest sister now. ;)
 

Shirleen

Gold Member
S: 21st12.5lb C: 21st4lb G: 12st0lb BMI: 45.3 Loss: 0st8.5lb(2.77%)
#10
Next time she says "You know you want this" with food, answer with "not as much as I want a size ?" insert number as appropriate x
 

HPSaucy

Will get there one day!
S: 17st8lb C: 14st8.5lb Loss: 2st13.5lb(16.87%)
#11
Sadie, I always joke to my hubby that my sis was switched at birth, she is blonde and right handed, we're all dark and left handed and she's so difficult!
 
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HPSaucy

Will get there one day!
S: 17st8lb C: 14st8.5lb Loss: 2st13.5lb(16.87%)
#12
Lucky7 said:
And I suppose up til now you have backed up the 'can't help it because it's genetic' theory by being the same size. You've kind of swept that away haven't you. You never know though, once she's got over it a bit, maybe she can look to you for advice and inspiration of how to get trim and fit herself xx
I would like to think that was the case but she says "I'll never be slim, look at my hips, I'd look stupid being thin with hips this big" I turned around and said that she'd be surprised as my saddlebags are getting smaller from the running and she huffed and changed the subject lol!

You're right about the genetics thing, I didn't say it but did sometimes think it! Did you then? X
 

HPSaucy

Will get there one day!
S: 17st8lb C: 14st8.5lb Loss: 2st13.5lb(16.87%)
#13
Maximus said:
First of all, rise above it, and continue to do so.

You have ALL the power here, and she cannot handle it - simple as that. Although an unusual one, this is most definitely a non-scale victory (NSV).

Continue to hold the moral high ground and eventually she will accept it, or even embrace it and do it herself.

Well done!

Steve
Thank you Steve for your kind words, she has tried SW before but not stuck to it. I haven't tried to ram it in her face at all but when one evening I got a few awards in one night, I took a photo and sent them to show her as I was really chuffed and she didn't even reply.
 

HPSaucy

Will get there one day!
S: 17st8lb C: 14st8.5lb Loss: 2st13.5lb(16.87%)
#14
Shrimpy said:
My sis was like that too, I saw her the time before last when I had dropped from a 18 to a 14 and she said that it was good we were the same size (she's a 20)... Then last time I saw her I had almost reached target and was a size 8 and she said absolutely nothing. Not one single comment. I just let it slide, cause we (you and I) have the power, we're the ones who are making this change for US, not them. Though, it does make me a teeny bit smug when I can honestly say I'm the littlest sister now. ;)
Wow you've done really well, it's hard to believe that the people you love so much can hurt so much just by not acknowledging the hard work. Are you at target now then? X
 

HPSaucy

Will get there one day!
S: 17st8lb C: 14st8.5lb Loss: 2st13.5lb(16.87%)
#15
Shirleen said:
Next time she says "You know you want this" with food, answer with "not as much as I want a size ?" insert number as appropriate x
That's a great quote, might find myself using that one.. I'm actually quoting that to myself right now, sitting in the office, shattered, craving something sweet and with an office full of biscuits, cakes and sweets!
 

GothGoddess

Time to start again!
#16
HPSaucy said:
Sadie, I always joke to my hubby that my sis was switched at birth, she is blonde and right handed, we're all dark and left handed and she's so difficult!
There's always one in every family! Lol, least my Bro's an Angel albeit a Hells Angel... xx

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biggysmalls

Too big to fail
S: 12st5.5lb C: 10st12.3lb G: 9st0lb BMI: 24.6 Loss: 1st7.3lb(12.25%)
#17
I have three sisters, love them lots but two of them are extremely competitive. And maybe I am too, although I'd like to think I'm not.

Anyway, top of the list of things to compete over is weight (which is obviously closely linked to looks in general), money is probably number two but nowhere near as important as number one, and relationships are at number three, I would say....

It's sad but true! When I lose a bit, one of my sisters always tells me she has noticed. But the she also asks me how much I weigh now, just to reassure herself that she's still "the winner"......
 

Maximus

Gold Member
S: 17st7lb C: 10st10lb G: 10st5lb BMI: 24.2 Loss: 6st11lb(38.78%)
#18
My sis was like that too, I saw her the time before last when I had dropped from a 18 to a 14 and she said that it was good we were the same size (she's a 20)... Then last time I saw her I had almost reached target and was a size 8 and she said absolutely nothing. Not one single comment. I just let it slide, cause we (you and I) have the power, we're the ones who are making this change for US, not them. Though, it does make me a teeny bit smug when I can honestly say I'm the littlest sister now. ;)
Your sister's a lobster to your mollusc;)
 

Shrimpy

Gold Member
S: 13st6lb C: 8st12lb G: 8st11lb BMI: 24.2 Loss: 4st8lb(34.04%)
#19
Wow you've done really well, it's hard to believe that the people you love so much can hurt so much just by not acknowledging the hard work. Are you at target now then? X
It's just crap, but some people have such low self esteem that they have to get the last say and be the centre of attention. We are better than that. :) Head held high, we're doing this right!

Yeah I'm at target now. :)

That's a great quote, might find myself using that one.. I'm actually quoting that to myself right now, sitting in the office, shattered, craving something sweet and with an office full of biscuits, cakes and sweets!
Good on ya! It's amazing how much being able to say no does for our feeling of self worth. :)

Your sister's a lobster to your mollusc;)
LOL, I like that a lot! :D
 
S: 15st7lb C: 8st9lb G: 9st2lb Loss: 6st12lb(44.24%)
#20
I totally understand where you're coming from. I'm the eldest of 3 girls and have always been the biggest. Every time I have tried to change the way I eat, my middle sister buys chocolate/ suggests takeaways etc, and because I was weak I gave in therefore going off diet and putting weight on. This time I have stuck to it and changed my ways for good. I'm no longer the biggest one but now my middle sister says that she's going to diet because she is not having me be thinner than her and my youngest sister doesn't say anything at all. Oh well!!
 


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