Some tips from me for life after Cambridge....Long

[Minerva]

Thank you KD! As always you're an absolute star and inspiration!
I have definitely been working hard on using all your advice scattered around the forum, and in this post I see that I am well on the way to developing a 'healthy lifestyle' rather than 'forever dieting'.
I've been working so hard on re-programming my brain...! It I guess definitely takes the longest - and will still need to be done for years to come. However, it is working.
Before I did my LL diet: I used to not eat vegetables often at all, and all I'd eat was pasta. I LOVED the stuff. Not a day would go by if I couldn't have at least a bucket of it.
However, now... I can't live without vegetables. I don't need a bucket of them (have learned portion control and moderation! it doesn't take much to not feel hungry - what a revelation that was! very liberating too ). Also pasta: I actually don't want any. It's so BLAND and boring. I choose to go for taste and flavours rather than a "quick-fix" meal.

The other great piece of advice which I followed through from you was: the question. When I get a hunger pang, or a craving for something, or I just want to eat.. I always ask myself: "But Why?"
If I don't see a good enough reason to eat something (i.e. not hungry, just ate a meal, etc etc) then I choose not to have it and move on. Sometimes on rare occasion though: I give in just because I want it! We never NEED a cookie: but it's damn nice to sometimes have one! And the key is: have ONE. I like that.

I feel free, I feel like I have a choice. I am in control of food, I am in control of me. If I start getting 'out of control' I have the choice to step back and reassess the situation. There is no black and white: it's never about winning or losing. We never truly lose until we give up on ourselves, and I have no intention of doing that.


So again, thank you - and well done on... well... living normally! Let me rephrase: Well done on being an amazing inspiration to the rest of us - showing us that it CAN be done with some soul searching and brain-rejiggling.

 

[LizzMB]

KD, thats super advice and i intend to follow it

i'm not at maintenance yet, actually just stepped back down to SS from SS+ for a couple of weeks before i have to go onto SS+...but i just wanted to start getting a feel for what its like being at goal!

I'm looking forward to 10st 5lbs A LOT right now!!!

xx

 

[Bess]

Just found this and re read it KD.
Even more helpful the second/third/fourth time around. Just going to print it out.

 

[MissPinky]

Just started 'Maintenance' and remembered this thread, which I read a while back. And so I came back... There's so many thoughts going round in my head - hopes and fears, and intentions. Many intentions! I have willpower and a positive mental approach to maintenance - and there's this advice which I think I need to return to often

I will maintain, I will learn, I will try not to persecute myself when the learning goes a little awry (because it probably will, once or twice). It's scary right now, 'managing myself', but it's exciting too. Cambridge has given me confidence, and a good starting figure and base weight to motivate me!

I've learned from the plans - I've adopted a model from the last few steps that should stand me in good stead... and I have developed a preference for CD bars rather than the standard muck you can buy in any confectioners!!! Much more tasty and much better for you I'm keeping those up by choice at present, one a day to satisfy the 'sweet treat' tendency mid morning. I plan my meals in advance - with planning there's less chance of going wild. It's easier now than it was - I know what tubs fit the portions I need, so I simply fill them and cart them off to work every morning. It's actually quite a freedom, because I don't have the pressure to seek out and buy whatever in the time I have available at lunch. I breathe before I eat, and enjoy every mouthful.

And I weigh daily - which I always thought was bad/mad/dangerous. But it's not - it aids mindfulness and responsiveness to circumstances when you need it. It also enlightens you - you start to see your natural cycles and rhythms laid out before you (especially if you chart it!). There's knowledge and learning in that. And self awareness.

Thanks for this KD

 

[Bess]

Brilliant post Miss Pinky, well done you, we are learning together.

 

[DisneyParis]

Thanks for posting this KD.

 

[kernowmum]

Wow KD some powerful thoughts here. Thank you... you are an inspiration to us all!

 

[Staffdieter]

Hi KD, thanks for this post which is the most enlightening piece I have read on weight maintenance. I am new to this and have found it difficult to find helpful advice, and so it is great to learn from your 'article'.

 

[eternity]

I've read this post a few times, it's really made me reaise that maintaining is different and a whole new challenge.
Thank you KD, you've really helped me. I want to keep my weight off this time and need people's experience to show me that it can be done.

P.S I hope you don't mind me posting on here because I'm not a CD person

 

[KD]

P.S I hope you don't mind me posting on here because I'm not a CD person

No problem at all

 

[Swz]

Thanks for this KD. I'll look for this again when I reach my target weight having failed to maintain last time I got there. Some very useful information.

 

[JanD]

Don't know why I haven't seen this before! Thanks KD - brilliant post as usual.
I've been 'maintaining' since last June - 42 weeks and counting. I say 'maintaining' because it doesn't feel like maintaining. It feels like eating/drinking too much and then cutting back for a while. I'm STILL working on the head stuff. I definitely don't think or behave like a thin person yet and sometimes wonder if I ever will.
Reaching goal weight is most definitely only the beginning of the journey! However I'd far rather have these issues than the ones I had before. This is where I wanted and want to be and I WILL stay here! xx

 

[KD]

You've been doing brilliantly Jan :clap: Though I'm trying to avoid replying on daries for various reasons, I often pop into yours to see how you're doing and admire your tenacity for not jumping on that LT wagon for minor gains.

I definitely don't think or behave like a thin person yet and sometimes wonder if I ever will.

I would love to say "you will!...you will!", but I can't, because I just don't know

Mine can still be a conscious effort at times. I behave like one. I'm not always one. An actor on the stage. And sometimes hoping that if I act well enough for long enough, I will metamorphosise into the person I'm pretending to be.

But most of the time now I am that person, and all is well. No conscious effort. I just am.

Post Christmas to spring is my sticky point...full of doubts that are hard to shift. But I know that when spring comes, out will pop that side of me that 'just is'. The one that makes this all seem so easy that I still surprise myself at times. The one that can do it without much thought ..(now anyway).

And though I do doubt myself at times, I absolutely know that if I ever put on a load of weight again, it will be because of something totally out of my reach. I know I've cracked this, and I can do it forever, because bumpy though the ride is, going back to how I was is just not an option. I couldn't bear it.

 

[JanD]

I couldn't bear it either KD which is why I sooo frustrate myself when my behaviour belies that resolve.

Reading your reply makes me wonder whether I too may have the Christmas to spring thing (or maybe that's just a hope! ) because I am struggling a little at the moment. I don't have long enough experience to see a yearly pattern but I DO think (or is it again just a hope) this 'bingey' phase is quickly (or at least eventually) followed by a more 'resolved to sort it out' phase. Again I don't have enough experience yet to rely on that and so still feel extremely vulnerable when I don't appear to be able to control what's going on - like now
Although a return to TFR would be (and has been) tempting because it's so simple, it wouldn't actually solve the overriding issues so I will resist that temptation as long as I can, although never say never. I would take that option rather than gain soooo much I couldn't see a way back.

In some ways it's frustrating to know that after nearly 5 years you still aren't able to just relax and let it all happen but no more so than realising that getting to goal is only the beginning. Both realisations are fundimental to a permanent solution and perhaps that is that there is NO permanent solution - just better management.

I continue to thank you and be in awe of your knowledgeable and wonderfully helpful posts. I'm happy to know you are keeping your eye on me - I'm sure you would post if you saw something you thought was REALLY wrong or could REALLY help so that's great.

Take care xx

 

[KD]

In some ways it's frustrating to know that after nearly 5 years you still aren't able to just relax and let it all happen but no more so than realising that getting to goal is only the beginning. Both realisations are fundimental to a permanent solution and perhaps that is that there is NO permanent solution - just better management.

Yes, better management...and making new pathways in the brain stronger and stronger so we use those techniques automatically.

In some ways it's frustrating to know that after nearly 5 years you still aren't able to just relax and let it all happen

It's not quite like that. I do relax, but stay aware if you know what I mean. It's a niggle more than anything. But it's normal. Just like a ex smoker may get the urge to have a cigarette after many years of not wanting one. Trying to be the person who never has that desire, who believes that after x amount of years they wont ever have that thought in their mind is unrealistic.

The best I can do is know how to manage the desire, rather than assume it wont come ever again. It's just at this time of year, there are more periods of desire because being slim during this season doesn't bring the same rewards (in my head). My winter clothes aren't so close fitting as a reminder of what I've done. My chest is bad, so I don't want to rush around enjoying life. I want to sit and self comfort. My rewards are easier to spot in the summer when I can see my body in summer clothes, and I'm out and about enjoying life.

We have to see the rewards of NOT following our past habits quickly. It needs to be immediate...not 'but I want to be slim for summer'. That can work, but it's harder as we will always go for the immediate reward over the future reward.

I'll tell you about Fred in a mo.

 

[KD]

Changing habits using Fred

 

[Bess]

Just responded on the wrong bit, I meant I read this section all the time...thankyou so much.

 

[FabTar]

Wonder where all these people are now nd how they are doing weight wise

 

[JanD]

I'm still around ... Currently around 10lbs over target and working on it. It hasn't got any easier for me I'm sorry to say, it's still a constant challenge, but I still say I'd rather have this challenge than still be battling at nearly 16st as I was in 2009.

I can't see your info on my iPad but hope you're doing ok x



Edit ...... too many 'stills'!! Lol!

 

[ED.]

Please tell me KD is still maintaining xx