Surviving Aunty Edith

[Gemstone]

The weightloss was going along quite nicely, the food satisfying and the hunger pangs non-existant. All was well on Planet Gemstone and the sun was shining. To be honest I was getting a little smug. Although the weight was not exactly droppng off it was fairly steady and all without letting on to anyone what I was up to.
Then it happened! The phone call started quite innocently with a discussion about old family gatherings and then the invite for THREE WHOLE DAYS in the tender loving care of Aunty Edith.

Now let's get this straight right at the beginning. Aunty Edith was the cheek pincher of my childhood and liked nothing better than a nice chubby cheek to pinch. Apple faced and rotund, she produced wonderful things from her old fashioned kitchen and expected it to be eaten - every crumb! As I was fed fit to bust she would utter phrases such as "Nothing wrong with a bit of puppy fat Dear".

Then later, in my teens, when I proudly paraded my new ideal weight and shape at a family gathering Aunty Edith tut-tutted at me and said, "I can see someone needs feeding up this weekend, you're looking far too skinny Gemma dear". She fussed around me all weekend as though it was her life's work was to turn me into Miss Piggy.

That's not all. Aunty Edith makes country wine. No-one has ever known her secret, only that it tasted heavenly and kicked you in the pants like the devil on a mission.

Now another gathering loomed and I knew it would have a devastating effect on my weight!

As the car sped toward Aunty Edith's I knew it was going to be a difficult weekend. It didn't matter how big I got, Aunty Edith was convinced that I needed feeding and nothing in this world would change her mind.

As we walked up the path I told myself that this weekend would be different. This time I had a secret weapon. This time I would enjoy the weekend, have fun and be happy to be in the company of those I loved - and the weight? Well, what harm can one weekend do? I can go with the flow and think about that tomorrow....and the next day....and the day after that......

© July 2008

 

[SkinkWitch]

I love your style of writing - can't wait for the next instalment!

 

[Gemstone]

Thank you SkinkWitch. I enjoy seeing the funny side of situations x

 

[kazzymc]

awwwwwwwwwwww bless aunty edith, im sure we all have someone like her in the family

 

[Gemstone]

Too right Kazzy. Are all the Aunty Ediths of this world are conspiring against us I wonder?

 

[kazzymc]

i think it more like the era they were brought up in when you ate everything due to food shortages etc and they cant understand why we dont want to eat everything,,,,,,,well we do but we understand we cant lol

 

[Gemstone]

You've got it in one Kazzy. Aunty Edith lived through some hard times but was always resourceful - a family legend. She has always kept a good garden with plenty of fresh vegetables and fruit. Unfortunately she has also found many high calorie ways of preserving her produce, whether to eat or to drink - and who could resist all that home produced bounty served up with a jolly smile. It's too much to bear so you go with the flow x

 

[kazzymc]

you have to go with the flow as you cant upset aunty edith as she is always a nice old lady with her heart in the right place and who could hurt a person like that i know i couldnt

 

[Gemstone]

That's right - my sentiments entirely Kazzy x

 

[abz]

i have an aunty joyce who is exactly the same. who checks i'm losing weight every time we talk (and if i had been every time i told her i still was i'd be non-existent by now) yet tries to feed me biscuits and goodies every time we go there. her mince pies are to die for and her corn beef and potato pies are heavenly (my grandma's were legendary too. it must be a northern thing, ha) and i've tried to explain that when i next come to visit over the next month or so i won't be able to eat anything she has. in the end i had to tell her that the doctor was monitoring me (kind of) and that all my food was given to me so i'd bring some soup!! i don't know how i'm going to get through it though. a short visit i think!! ha. either that or i'll give all my biscuits to thomas and hope she doesn't notice!! he needs fattening up in any case. he's six foot 2 and a 30 inch waist. git

abz xx

 

[Gemstone]

I'm not on CD so I just go with the flow with Aunty Edith and sort it out later. In our family it was little corned beef and potato pies with little lids on (like the Christmas mince pies). I reckon it was an era thing that got passed down (maybe wartime) I don't really know x

 

[abz]

either way, i love them!! even though corned beef usually doesn't do it for me, hand me one of those pies any day!! hee.

abz xx

 

[Gemstone]

I feel the same way about corned beef (and meat in general mostly) but those pies were pure and simple comfort food - loverly grub!