Terrible update

[Yasmine]

Hi everyone, I hope you are all doing well, most of you are and I really admire you for doing so. I wish I had the disapline to do so.

I can't beleive I'm letting this happen. I'm back to square one. I hate myself again, I completely lost control and now I'm getting fat again.

No matter how full I am, no matter how much pain I'm in or how bloated I am, I can't stop eating. And I've really been doing something so stupid and I'm scared that I'm hooked on making myself sick. I've been doing it for about a week now.

Now, I have to do lipotrim while on holiday because if I don't It's going to pile all back on. I'm too scared to go back on the scales, I want to know the damage but at the same time I don't.

And it seems now that no matter what I eat, I bloat. I've been bloated for 1 week :cry:.

I've taken laxatives, I haven't gone at all. I've got pain in my back, I haven't slept for days, I've had mugs upon mugs of peppermint tea for the bloating, as well as taken 16 tablets of rennie a day. I also tried deflatine. Nothing is stopping the bloating!

I wish that I could just live off Lipotrim. I hate eating! it just makes me feel like ****! I feel horrible, disgusting, I feel like me when I was 15st.

I'm back on Lipotrim tomorrow and this time I'm going down to 9st, even if it messes me up inside.

 

[SUPASLIMMA]

Yasmine, get yourself to your GP urgently. I am desperately worried about you and really feel you need councelling as it is now apparent that you are suffering from an eating disorder. I have to get back to work now, as my tea-break is over, but Yasmine, please, please go immediately your GP for professional help.

 

[summergurl]

I agree with Supa yas and i have said before - you need to see your doctor/nurse or someone along them lines. I think all your bad eating habits (as you say they are) are linked to somehow you having severe emotional/thought problems. You are bording on developing a full blown eating disorder and i would hate for that to happen to you.

You have come such a long way honey and now is not the time to be messing it up. You look fabulous and have dropped so much weight i dont think you need to lose any more! Seriously though, please go and get some proffessional advice on this - maybe councelling or something? I dont mean to sound patronising and if i do i am sorry but am just worried for you :hug99: xx

 

[dia1972]

Yasmine, the feelings of being bigger than you are after losing a lot of weight can be quite typical...but the being sick and laxative use is very worrying.

You are fantastic for being so honest - you know you are with friends on this forum and part of the process of adaption after using Lipotrim is being transparent with other people in the same position. I really think you need to get a little bit of extra support here, though. The GP can refer you for CBT counselling for free (we could all do with it on our weight issue journey, really).

Remember Lighter Life includes the counselling ...but we have to address our mental adaption by ourselves!!

 

[xsarahloux]

I totally agree with everyone Yasmine, you have to see your GP. i'm honestly not sure if getting on the scales is a good or bad idea. on one side it might show you it's not as bad as you thought, and on the other hand it might really upset you, but you MUST remember at the end of the day, that this is not the end of the world. you have done it before and you will do it again.

be proud of what you have achieved and you cannot carry this behaviour on - it is more damaging to you than you may realise.

i have been in a similar place myself, which also included self harming and it took some brave friends of mine to really pu my head back in place. i saw my GP and a counsellor at school (at the time!) and although i am still battling with my weight demons, i am no longer tempted to make myself sick or the like.

please hun, we are all so worried about you, you owe it to yourself to seek proper help.

good luck darling, and let us know how you get on.

Sxx

 

[Scotsmist]

Hi Yasmine

Oh, my heart goes out to you..I too have an eating disorder and it is no fun at all, especially since you felt so in control whist on LT, but it obviously has helped the All or Nothing syndrome at the time, it hasnt addressed your fears, emotions and everything else tied up in the out of control feeling. I know exactly where you are coming from...as much as you hate it, you cant stop.

BUT, like the others said.....please go to your GP! My only fear there is that they are slow and it will take months and months to get you therapy..Get onto BEAT which is an eating disorder website. beat : Welcome to beat There is help there immediately and a 10 week course you can maybe go on.

Dont bash yourself up; gosh, you have come a long long way and you are an inspiration to a lot of us on here!!

Dont bottle it all up; but I think the fact you have shared it on here, is good as quite often we live in isolation and tell no one at all, which makes it worse.

Please take care and do get some help quickly..dont delay at all.

 

[Michillinwoman]

Yasmine. I am so sorry you find yourself back in this position again .My heart goes out to you . I wish I was closer to you to try and get you some help. You have to talk to someone Yas , you know making yourself sick is not healthy . Its not the answer . You have to learn how to eat again. Going back on lipotrim is only a short term solution ,you cant stay on it forever.

I know here in Ireland there is an organisation called Overeaters Annonomous(cant spell) and there is also an organisation called Bodywhys . Maybe these are in England too . Just google them and see and they may have a free phone number that you can call to talk to someone if you dont want to tell family .

But as the others said your GP should be the best person to refer you to a specialist. Just explain to him/her whats been happening .Dont bottle this up Yas .

 

[sbridge7]

Hey Yasmine,
I'm sorry to hear about the last few weeks. Lipotrim isn't the solution and neither is getting down to 9 stone. I agree, I think it would be best to see your GP, they can help you. Lipotrim is like a plaster- it covers the wound (i.e helps you lose weight) but it isn't a long term solution. In my opinion, Lipotrim at this time is doing you more harm than good. Please see your GP, you've done so well but you have to re-educate yourself, in terms of eating x

 

[JanD]

You already know what I think Yas. I said it all last time you were in this position. Now lots of others are saying it too PLEASE listen to them.

However that doen't help right now because you're on holiday aren't you? Another few weeks to go as well if I'm not mistaken. All you can really do is muddle through as best you can until you come back. Although if you can get on the internet and some of the sites that have been recommended perhaps you'll find some advice there that will help you at least until you come home.

Don't stop coming on here though. We're all very concerned for you.

Try to enjoy your holiday. Love and (((((hugs))))) xx

 

[Michillinwoman]

Hi Yas, was wondering how you are feeling now. Hope you dont feel like we are all against you pet. Everyone is just worried about you and wants to help. We are just trying to shock you in to helping yourself.

When are you off on Hols ???? . Maybe a total change of scenery could really help to get you head around this . Some times we can get very focussed on our own situation and cant see a way out until we change something. Try to enjoy your hols and when you come back you may be better able to talk this out with someone who can help you.

 

[Nenya]

Its a very slippery slope to try to get down to 9 stone, because the chances are that won't be low enough for you and you will want to still get thinner.
Please get help now before you start to get ill with this.

 

[kered]

Hi Yasmine, I genuinely hope you are okay.
I too have said it all to you before, you need to get yourself some help, as this is not normal behaviour, you have some sort of eating disorder and getting to 9 stone will NOT help you. Even if you do get to 9 stone, this will all just flare up again as you need some professional help.

Please do not delay hun and seek some professional advice.