'That' Picture

[Sparkle]

Has anyone had one? The photograph of you that is so awful, it actually gives you a kick up the arse to do something?

I've actually lost 60lbs in just over a year, doing nothing more then moving in with my parents (this meant proper home cooked meals every night, rather then take away). I know I keep harping on about this, but I'm very proud. However, I still have another 40, if not 50lbs to lose!

The last few months I've been doing 'Sweet FA' about it all. I keep meaning to, and 'trying', but giving up... and worst of all I've started bingeing again! I don't know why! I don't enjoy eating the food, because I'm just stuffing it down before someone sees me, and not actually enjoying each mouthful. I feel sick after, and I hate myself after as well!

I did start going out clubbing again, but I've got back into the frame of mind that I don't deserve to go out beause I'm fat! I honestly believe that people think less of people who are overweight! Even I judge people! I look at them and ask myself, why do they let themselves get like that!?

So yesterday, prompted by the weight loss tablets thread on OT, I decided to start on the Xenicol my doctor gave me a prescription for. I took one yesterday evening. My reasoning wasn't so I could lose weight, I know the only sensible way to do that is eat healthily (WW works for me) and exercise. It was, if I binge, I'm going to be getting stomach cramps and having a horrible time on the loo. It was all to stop me bingeing.

I haven't taken one today, as I've felt pretty focused, and actually stopped myself from considering eating/bingeing on anything.

However I've got extra motivation now.

We had our work xmas party on Saturday. Fancy dress. I went as a cow girl - as did the two other girls in my branch. They both got their costumes from the fancy dress shop, I had to 'make' mine as none of the costumes in the shop fit. Still, I thought I looked pretty good. I've just found a picture of me on the night, with the two other girls. I look disgusting. I look awful. I nearly cried.

I'm now emailing this picture to my home email, and I'm going to have it printed off onto proper photo paper, and I'm going to stick it up in the house. Every time I feel like bingeing, or not sticking to the diet (just having a day off - which always turns into a week, which magically turns into a month) I'm going to look at this picture.

I'm now asking myself "Why did I let myself get like this!?".

 

[Gill-cdthing]

yup i have the pic too, in fact its in the gallery and i looked like a hefferlump, it was so awful, its emblazoned into my brain,

 

[MadamDotty]

Yes my before picture really give me a kick up the ar*e, I was fooling myself that I looked ok

A few years ago though I had a video nasty LOL that gave me quite a jolt - and led to a spell at weight watchers. It was my daughters birthday and we'd hired a bouncy castle. In the evening when all the guests had gone home, hubby and his two older children and myself decided to have some fun ourselves on it and videod it. I was watching it back later that evening, when a very large woman emerged from the shadowy corners of the bouncy castle and threw herself, quite energetically for a large girl - around. It took me a few moments to work out who this "fattie" was - it was me, I looked enormous, it was quite a shock!

 

[Mini]

That Picture!!!

My picture is so bad I would die of shame if anyone besides my husband saw it

I only seen this particular 'photo' about a week or so after I started my weight loss journey and I am glad I did not see it before as it was so depressing ...

I went through all the guilt about why did I let myself get like that...I have stopped beating myself up, it took awhile to get out of that negative habit and see it as a waste of energy.

For the way I see it now at that time in my life when I was putting on the weight, I was dealing with so many different things and I did the best I could at that particular time. It is not like I woke up Fat over night...it went on gradually. I never ever could of imagined me who was a skinny wee thing for years could double in size and then some more

I take 'that picture' out every now and then to remind myself of what I have achieved so far as I know how easy it is to slide back into self-deprecation...

For me this is a weight loss journey and not a race. We are all unique an we all have our own unique way of losing weight within the means and time to suit each and everyone of us.

Finding what suits is half the battle, keeping our focus on what we hope to achieve is the other half.

Congratulations on losing 60lbs. already!!!

I do expect to lose 40lbs. over the next few months.

Love Mini xxx

 

[Sparkle]

Well I've uploaded the picture to my gallery thing. I've also ordered a print of it that I'm going to put up somewhere I can see it every day!

 

[Curvy_Chicken]

Hey Sparkle

Well done on taking such a brave move - you are doing soo well and goodluck!

Here is the photo that made me diet (I am the one in the red):

But I am feeling great at the moment one stone and nine pounds later (GI Diet) and actually pleased with this photo, I can't wait to be at my target!

Sparkle - you will get there! Take care love CC xxx xxx xxx

 

[Russiandoll]

'That' photo for me is the one in my photobox (link below) of me wearing a white T-shirt and sitting on a rock with hubby. The full enormity of my belly and the sad, haunted look on my face says it all (not to mention I look so old!)

 

[Eclipse]

This was my "that" photo. Taken at a friend's birthday, I cut out the other friends there, cos they made me look even more horrendous!

 

[Russiandoll]

CC - you're right to be pleased with your latest pic: you're looking fab!

Eclipse - you looked lovely before but now you look awesome ... and totally different!

I feel the same when I look at my own pics .... I hardly recognise myself! I think my face looks totally different. I'm going up North to visit old friends where I used to live on the 15th and they haven't seen me since before the diet ... should be ineresting!

 

[carbaddict]

CC...love your tights in the first picture! I want some!

Looking good everyone!

CA X

 

[Eclipse]

Thanks RD, you are looking brill yourself if you don't mind me saying so!

Can't wait to meet up with you and the others in Portsmouth.

 

[i'lldoit]

'THAT PICTURE'

YES I have mine on my bad food cupboard door I look like a barrel .........##

I do feel if anyones like me that I avoided having my pic taken as I know how bad I looked but if I didnt see it I could easily ignore it !

Good luck on your weight loss hun

XXC

 

[baileys]

THAT PICTURE

For me is our lovely holiday snaps - there I was walking along the beach and DH took a picture - from a distance I add - but there I was you could see me out of all the other people on the beach - I was the one who looked like a cube with thick sturdy legs....

I showed this to my mum and said 'look at this terrible picture - I look huge' (of course thinking the camera adds a least three stone....) - my DM said 'but sweetheart thats how you look) Heartbroken is not the word for it - I ever really thought of myself as that big until I saw that photo - I ripped all the other photos of me on this holiday (apart from the ones with the kids) and threw them away - I've kept this one though - it still makes me shudder to look at it

 

[tryingtobelittlebit]

We had a family party at the weekend. I was thinking I looked ok. Then at the end of it DH was scrolling through the photos and I saw myself.

Back on the wagon today.

After much use of the delete button on the camera yesterday!

 

[Starlight]

Every photo is THAT photo for me!!! The last time I happily had my photo taken was at my brothers wedding in Sept 2001.

I got over a major hurdle yesterday and was in 4 photos at my nieces christening. Mainly because I knew it was what my family wanted. I wasnt overly enthusiastic but I did it.

Cant wait for when I dont run and hide from the camera. I have a number of photos of family and friends up in my living room and would love to have my photo taken WITH my friends... something else to add to my list of goals

 

[Starlight]

Marie I can so relate to everything youve said. I absolutely adore my nieces, the eldest is 4. I have about 2000 photos of her on my PC - Im in I think 2 of them and thats very reluctantly. I so regret missing out on all the photos I could have taken or been in with her. I reluctantly was in 4 photos yesterday at the wee ones christening and due to my dads dodgy camera only one turned out - I hate it! But my parents like it, which depresses me even more!!! I WILL keep it and put up with it but purely because I know how much it means to my brother.

I actually have several photos up and framed of me at his wedding 5 years ago, I was still overweight then but not as much as now.

I cant wait to feel better about myself, when I do I have a whole list of photos I want to have taken.