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The broken chair club!


Ugly duckling going Swan.
Hands in the air if you have ever broken a chair!

It's more common that you think and boy when it happens, you have to be surrounded by people at the time because it's some universal law your shame must be carried out with an audience. I have broken 3 in my lifetime, including a cinema style one. Oh yes. I couldn't leave right away so have to work out my leg and back muscles and hold the thing in place til I could leave! The SHAME!

Breaking chairs is one of our biggest fears but since we all intend not to break anymore, why don't we look at the funny side of this and join our own exclusive broken chair club and share in the knowledge we are not alone!
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Just Peachy

Slowly But Surely
I remember cracking a crappy patio chair once but it was old and stuff so it wasn't too embarassing or anything.

Once I got stuck in one of those child's swing things but I was still a kid; it was meant for babies but I wanted to use it anyway!

I hope that never happens to me.

I was watching this show called One Big Happy Family on TLC back home in Canada and it's basically this family of four, they're all between 300 and 400 pounds and get really bad news from their doctors. They decide to change their habits as a collective family effort. Anyway, pretty heart breaking show, but sadly it made me feel better about myself. Point is, in the first episode, the mum breaks the kitchen chair... and they all go to the water park without shame in their swim trunks and bathing suits as well and you just see everybody staring and saying nasty comments. Urgh! Horrible.

But yeah, to no broken chairs in 2010!


Ugly duckling going Swan.
My biggest dread was those desk style chairs with the little table attatched! As a student I would avoid them like the plague, offering them up so they all filled up and I had to sit on the floor or at a proper table!

And I hate those seats they have welded to the floor in places like wimpy where you have to subtlely suck everything in to sit down! ARRRRRRRRRGH! :eek:


Silver Member
Hands down as I haven't broken one yet but I think that has just been good luck on my side.

Only last week I went to a cafe with a friend and her daughter and there was no way I could squeeze into the chair with the people at the table behind. Pretty embarassing when my friend had to move so I could have her seat, she can fit into a size zero though!!!!! Love her to bits but boy do I hate her figure, she is just so petite.

Most embarassing which I wasn't going to put here but I guess I should. In the summer at a theme park I got onto a ride with the kids and they couldn't close down the barrier and so another mum had to swop places with me, then I could have died of shame as we were in a row of about 10 people and it was me stopping it closing. I think that was probably the deciding factor on me starting my diet as I could only stand back and watch them all enjoy the ride.


Ugly duckling going Swan.
Awww no you poor thing! See, it never happens when there is few people about, there has to be a crowd!

As well as the cinema style chair, I broke a chair during a lesson at college. We were half way through and it just went and I went down in front of 50 people! I laughed it off but the mad part was to help me feel less shame some kind people starting pretending their chairs were feeling dodgy too and sat on the steps which was nice of them but at the same time ADDED to the shame in a way!

I have avoided in the past sitting in places because I felt it would be a squeeze.
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Loves life
I fortunately have never broken a chair - good luck not good management.

My worst nightmare was always football matches - there's not much room on them to begin with but some clubs cut bits off the sides then they can fit more people in. The shame bit comes when you're wedged between 2 people, one hubby - that's ok, but one at the other side that gives you dirty looks all through the match.

When you score everyone jumps up and you get an even dirtier look as you wedge yourself back in again as you sit down.



Ugly duckling going Swan.
Awwww no! Well you confessed in the right place! :D


Silver Member
Yes it always has to be in front of an audience when we embarass ourselves doesn't it.

Another thing, a few years ago on a flight we had seats by one of the emergency exits and I found the seat was really snug to the point of being uncomfortable and I thought I must have had a massive weight gain. It was only when I moved back a row to have a lie down that I realised it wasn't me it was the seat. They were narrower in the emercency row. I never did tell hubby why I stayed behind him for the rest of the flight.


Full Member
I have never broken a chair.

But In 2007 my best friend and I went on holiday to Faliraki, and went to a water park.

She went down and every one was looking as she wound round, slipped and slid to the bottom.

I got on...and my hips got stuck right at the top, I was too low to come back up, but high enough that when I looked back I could see and hear everyone laughing, I had to pull myself along to the bottom using my hands and legs.

That was the longest water slide ride of my life.


Full Member
Heres my story :D

I was sitting on my pc playing a video game and i was on ventrillo which is a voice chat program so i can talk to the people im playing with , i did something really amazing in the game lent back and fell off my chair...

Then things went from bad to worse , sat back down and a wheel snapped off and i fell off again lol


Silver Member
Chan my sympathies are with you. As I said before we must have an audience to these things must't we?

Tony did the other players know what was happening to you at the time?


Full Member
They heard , they heard me trying to balance myself out and then a big thud on the ground , i think tonys dead they said..



Ugly duckling going Swan.
Oh dear you poor things!


Silver Member
Too right we will have the last laugh.

Tony did you carry on playing after all that or did you let them think your were dead and try to sneak away from the game?


Full Member
about BIG bottom and shallow chairs

I have never broken a chair... but...

I have similar thing to be embarrassed with:
At my best friend BD party my bottom didn’t fit into shallow fashionable chair.
It happened in front of group of boys from my neighbourhood.
Since then I never try to park myself in shallow chairs in front of people.

I hope that never happens to me again.

Girls, amazingly funny stories! Thanks for entertainment!


technologically ignorant
My chair collapsed under me in the middle of my brother's Best Man speech at his best friend's first wedding. The marriage didn't last long - I wonder if it was an omen.


Ugly duckling going Swan.