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The dreaded leaving do

S: 17st11lb C: 12st2lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 28.3 Loss: 5st9lb(31.73%)
I went to the gym on Wednesday. It was good. I was only doing a fraction of what I did before Christmas and felt a bit tired halfway through. I had planned to go this evening but thought I would get some more rest and maybe go tomorrow morning.:):):)

Now that I got that bit out of the way:eek::eek::eek::eek:

Oh my God!!!

Crisps, cheese, grapes, celery sticks, several kinds of dips. Not one cake, not two cakes but, why don't I tell you what they were?

A chocolate sponge cake with two creamy layers and chocolate slab top. A traditional sponge cake with cream and jam filling. A pavlova with what looked like a basket of fruit on top. A large blueberry cheesecake. Perhaps I imagined it but I think there was another chocolate sponge at the opposite end of the table.

When I had a look I felt ill. I had a pain in my stomach. I felt shaky. I felt dizzy. I felt tears coming to my eyes. I'm not sure if I was having a breakdown, cracking up or what!!!

Sitting here typing this - I can still feel the horror of it. I sat at my desk and tried my best to ignore what was happening in the next room.

When people asked me if I wasn't having any - I said no. One person asked why not and I am worried I was a bit aggressive in my response. She said I wasn't when I apologised, just in case.

The guy who said I should have some cheesecake because that is "the only heaven we are gonna get", well that just made me mad. I was really fuming after he said that. Morbid obesity didn't feel very heavenly to me!!!

Sorry guys. I'm ranting now. Thinking about it all now, how I managed to get through I'll never know.

Oh well. Only the away day to face next week. :sigh::sigh::sigh: In March, there will be another leaving do. :eek::eek::eek:
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Trying Harder
S: 15st2lb C: 14st2lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 32 Loss: 1st0lb(6.6%)
well done you for re:Dsisting


Trying to stay positive..
hah, i had a lot of situations like this when on Cambridge:) suddenly everybody wanted to go to restaurants with me, baking cakes, etc etc. or some ppl just wanted me to be their "cooking and eating" buddy, to stand in the kitchen and entertain while they are awaiting the meal to be ready:) it was horrible, but i survived;p

Purple Hugs

Loves weight.. training!
S: 13st5.5lb C: 12st13lb G: 10st7lb BMI: 32.1 Loss: 0st6.5lb(3.47%)
Well done for resisting and for getting cross at their comments..shows your motivation! :)
S: 17st11lb C: 12st2lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 28.3 Loss: 5st9lb(31.73%)
Thanks guys. :):):)

Following that leaving do it has really hit me how powerful the psychological, the emotional and the social aspects of following a diet are. Not just within myself but externally as well. It seems a bit unfair that not only do I have to deal with my own issues I have to deal with the issues of others as well.

In my old work place I was amazed that some people were upset by my healthy eating. It's as if I were making them look and feel bad. When I started to eat a lot of unhealthy stuff they were over the moon.

Human nature. I have a lot to learn in this area. We all have a dark side and I reckon I will be seeing a lot more of that over the next few weeks.:sigh::sigh::sigh::sigh:

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