Thomasina's maintenance diary :)

[2 sizes smaller]

Hiya Harriet


what's vlcd?

 

[harriet2]

what's vlcd?

Very Low Calorie Diet

h x

 

[kered]

Loving the hair - looks really nice.

 

[Zenaworrier]

Well today has been a bit of a mixed bag! Put on a lb so far this week but lost 2lb over the weekend so I'm hoping this is just a fluctuation!
Had a major shoe crisis today! Hubby is coming back in a weeks time and not really sure what to wear. Before when I was bigger I never tended to dress up nice so have been trying to make an effort recently! Managed to get 4 pairs of shoes in the Dorothy Perkins sale for £24! What a bargain Having my step family round on sunday for dinner so going to get my step mummy to help me choose an outfit!

In other news ( I might ramble a bit here and I'm sure you guys will get bored of this but I just need to say it! ) my sisters biopsy came back today. The specialist already kinda prepared her for the fact it was cancer but it was a lot more serious than we thought. She is in hospital at 8am monday morning to start treatment. It is has all come as a bit of a shock. You always prepare yourself for the worst but you always try and push it to the back of your mind. My sister is the most stubborn person as well so she is still insisting she is fine!! Our step dad died of cancer only 3 years ago so this is all very raw for the family. I have kinda gone into a state of shock. She has always been the strong one and the super mum/wife/sister. She is 14 years older than me but I lived with her most of my life and she bought me up so she is more like a mum to me. She is the one that I can turn to and can say whatever I want or feel and she will always know exactly what to do to say. Now I have to be the strong one for her! All our family lives in Plymouth and we are about 5 hours away from them so we are the closest geographically. I really want to be there for her treatments and be strong but I'm finding it so hard! What do you say to someone in that situation? She has 5 kids 6-14 who have already had to deal with their mum and dad splitting up this year and no this.
Sorry to go on but my hubby is 4297 miles away and I just need to get it off my chest!

Anyway todays menu:
B- Bran flakes and ss milk
L- Jacket potatoe and egg mayonnaise ( did take a salad to work but was really hungry- don't know if this is the steroids )
D- Vegetable ravioli with veg
S- special k bar, pepsi max and ww lemon cheesecake for desert

My first thought today when all this happened was to eat! But so glad I didn't!
Sorry to ramble!
T x

 

[kered]

You can ramble anytime chick, you are certainly going through the mills at the moment.

Big hugs xxx

 

[Zenaworrier]

Thanks Mary,
Usually my life is quite boring! It just seems to have all come at once! I don't know if that makes it harder or easier!
T x

 

[summergurl]

ah sweetie! :hug99: You certainly are having a rough time of it and feel free to ramble, know that someones always around here to offer a few words or just a virtual hug.

Well done for not turning to food, keep that resolve strong but if you do slip know its not the end of the world.

I wish your sister all the best for her treatment and hope she recovers quickly xxxxxx

oh, well done on those bargain shoes!!!

 

[JanD]

So sorry about your sister. You say you don't know what to say to her ... then that's what you say .... "I'm here for you, but I don't know what to say" That will be plenty I promise. At times like that we just need to know people are there and we have their support. Platitudes and trite comments are just irritating. A hug and an 'I don't know what to say' means far more as it's honest and heartfelt. I'm sure she'll appreciate it. And as she's always been the one to look after you I'm sure she'll make it really easy for you.

Well done for not turning to food and don't ever worry about ranting or rambling on here, that's what we're here for.

Take care xx

 

[Zenaworrier]

Hi guys,
Just wanted to say a big thanks for letting me ramble the other day! My big bro drove all the way up from plymouth and got here 4am saturday morning so I wouldn't be alone. How sweet! You would think I was the one that had cancer- I was a bit of a mess. My sister is doing ok. With 5 kids she hasn't got much time to feel sorry for herself! Lots of family coming up next week so I might leave them to it for a while- I don't think she needs a lot of crying relatives at her door. Plus my hubby is coming back on friday. Haven't seen him in over 3 weeks and I'm so excited! I am a bit gutted because I thought I would be super dooper skinny for when he comes back but due to everything that's gone on I haven't really been focusing on my weight lose as much as I should. The 2lbs I lost over last weekend are officially back on! But the whole experience has given me control and knowledge that I can lose it. I have to admit yesterday I caved into a chocolate bar, some popcorn and a bit of curry but I didn't finish any of it where as before I would have scoffed the lot! I started the day with best intentions but thought I would enjoy my time with my brother as we don't often get to see each other.

So yesterdays menu
B- Bran flakes with banana
L- Jacket potatoe egg mayonnaise
D- Chicken tikka masala and one naan. Tiny bit of rice.
S- Half a bag of reg popcorn at the cinema and a bar of thortons choc

Next week hopefully should have a bit of time to focus on diet and exercise ( that's if nothing else goes wrong ! ) so I'm hoping for a miracle that I will shift a stone before hubby comes back on friday lol!

No not really! My goal in the short term now is to keep making healthy choices and go with the flow. All my best intentions and planning have gone out the window the last month but that's life! As long as I am at least STS and I am trying to do the best I can than I will be happy. Right now my focus has to be my sister and being there for her and the kids.
As I said this whole experience has given me empowerment to know that I do have control into what goes into my mouth and that I can see positive results if I'm healthy.
Anyway sorry for the long ramble yet again!
T x

 

[kered]

Hey Tiger,

I think at the moment, you need all your energy for coping with the issues in your family. I can see why food is not on your mind at the moment, apart from eating it for comfort, but you are just a loving Sister who is going through some mega turmoil at the moment.

Dont worry too much about the food front, that will all come in time chick, just concentrate on what you need to concentrate on. That was lovely that your Brother came to see you.........sweet. xxx

 

[JanD]

How lovely ... your brother I mean ... my sister didn't even come home when my father was actually dying so it sounds like you've got a great family connection. You're very lucky, make the most of it!!

Don't be worrying about the diet thing ... you've proved that you've changed ... be happy with knowing that for now and worry about getting off whatever else you want to lose when things are more settled! xx

 

[irish molly]

I am so so sorry to ear your news of your sister. You have an extra special bond with her as you relate to her in a motherly way as well as a sister. Jan is right, all you can do is hug her and let her know that you are there to do anything she wants you to do. Support her and her little family as best you can and look after yourself too as you are in shock too at present.
Well done for managing to avoid turning to food to comfort you at what is a most stressful time. Take care

 

[Zenaworrier]

Hi Lovely ladies!
Firstly I would just like to say thanks for all your kind words and support
Unfortunately life hasn't got any easier so beware this may be another long post!
Firstly diet-
I am in a state of confusion! As you know my brother came down this weekend. I also had my step family over for dinner on Sunday. I didn't eat to unhealthily but I probably ate more than I should! So anyway Monday morning I hopped onto the scales expecting a gain but no! I have lost 2lbs. Then I realised the same happened last weekend when I was at my sisters and not sticking to my 1200 cal plan. I have spent the week trying to be good and healthy but ended up putting the 2lbs back on! Not really sure what is going on! Does weight have a time delay system?!
So anyway my new plan is to stick to 1400 cals a day and see if this makes a difference. Also to keep drinking 2ls of water a day as this seems to make a difference. Also I haven't been really exercising as much as I used to. I have been doing sit ups and more core muscle workouts with my gym ball so I am going to keep this up. Really want to go for another run but I'm a bit scared that I may have a repeat of the other day so I am going to leave it till hubby gets home! Anyway with hubby home this weekend I should be getting plenty of exercise you know with all that unpacking and washing lol!

So anyway my life atm!
Well my sis is doing ok- as well as can be expected. My other sister is up there with her this week so I feel some of that pressure has been lifted. She has been texting me everyday but is pretty down in the dumps and has been texting me saying she can't do it, can't deal with life anymore etc. I am being very strong and hopefully texting her back all the right things. It feels very weird because I am the baby in the family so i'm never the one to dish out advice or have to be mature in situations but I guess its my turn now!
She saw the specialist on monday and has been diagnosed with papillary thyroid cancer which out of all the ones you can get this is the most treatable which is good! She has to have more surgery in 2 weeks to remove the rest of her thyroid and also some lymph glands that surround it. After this she will start radioactive iodine treatment. There is a 97% sucess rate with this so fingers crossed! So the future is looking better we just have to get her through the here and now.
Hubby was meant to come home tomorrow but his flights have been cancelled due to bad weather so will be back sunday instead. Although I am a bit gutted it gives me more time to get rid of a monster of a spot that has appeared on the end of my nose! These things always happen at the worst times! Also gives me time to get the wax strips out! I have to confess to not shaving my legs for a month- gross I know! Don't know what I would do without leggings!
I am actually quite looking forward to snapping back into wifey mode. Got all my baking ingredients yesterday and off to get a new bread tin today ( I know its sad, Im 22 and I bake my husband bread! ).
So thats about it! Im sorry for making you endour these long posts!
T x

 

[summergurl]

I don't think its sad you bake bread for your husband! Its cute! I love to do baking and little 'housewifey' things, although we dont actually live in our own place etc!

With weight gain, personally i think it does have a delay, i guess it takes time for your body to process it, nab all the fat and stick it to yer arse etc With the situation you are dealing with i think so far you are doing fab.

Im not sure what to say with regards to your sister but im sure she is in safe hands and with a 97% success rate its pretty reasuring. xxx

 

[JanD]

I don't think it's about any time delay re weight etc. I think it's what we said a couple of weeks ago when you weren't eating enough ... when you DO eat enough your body lets go of the excess, when you don't it hangs onto every ounce of energy it can coz it doesn't know if it's going to get enough in the future!

Regarding your sister ..... a very good friend of mine has had this EXACT same issue this year - with the EXACT same treatment and is now clear ..... she will be fine I promise xxx

 

[kered]

Thats good that your other Sister has come too, it must be a lot of pressure on you hun.

As for the weight gain, like I said before, try to choose healthily, but dont fret on it too much right now.

 

[Zenaworrier]

Hi Ladies,
Thought I would do a quick update while I have got a few mins at work!
Well everything is going suprisingly well atm! Still hovering around the 142lb mark but that suits me fine for now. I am starting to learn some new "skinny" girl eating habits like you don't have to eat everything on your plate! And no that packet of crisps wont vapourise- you can take an hour eating them! I finally worked out the whole BMR thing properly and I need 1300 cals for a 2lb a week lose so I'm sticking with that for the time being.
Off to do some baking tonight Hubby will be home tomorrow and so can't wait. Haven't seen him in over a month! I've got 4 days off work so fully intend to have a good time. Think we might have a BBQ monday if the weather is nice. Sis is on hols this week with her boyfriend so don't have to worry so much about her.
Anyhow I better go and do some work!
T x

 

[summergurl]

Have a lovely weekend chick xxx

 

[JanD]

It's great when you realise things and form better eatng habits as a result isn't it?

Hope you have a FAB weekend! x

 

[Scotsmist]

Hi Tiger
Just caught up with your post over the past 2 weeks. Sorry to hear about the news of your sister, but glad that you found out exactly what it is and that it is treatable and with Jan's friend recovering, that is even better news! Thinking of you at this time, and your family!

You are doing well and it is certainly a big learning curve learning to make healthy choices, but you will do it and will carry on making choices every day - probably for the rest of your life!! haha..like us all

Hope you had a lovely time with your hubby and enjoyed baking, etc...I too love to do that but sadly I never have enough time!

Take care and you are doing so well!!