Tillymax is trying again

[Mumma K]

Comes in to give Tilly a huggles x

 

[Pomooky125]

Tilly - I haven't got a diary! Can't think why anyone would want to read it. I haven't got much to say (except on everyone else's of course!) and I am rather shy actually! Also, I am just as fat as when I started - who wants to know about that?? Having said that, I have met lots of lovely people and it's nice to share stuff with other people. It's just that I share their's but not mine!

Po xxx

 

[Lily42uk]

Morning Tilly

Awww what a lovely lovely Son, all kids are a pain in the butt at times and boy when they are don't you just want to strangle them (at the very least :giggle but when they do something so lovely as what your Son did, you know you've got a good one and it washes away all the bad times

So lovely to hear you being more positive hun, 1 day at a time....oh and sod the ironing, I fold my clothes, put them in the draw or hang them in the wardrobe and iron them as I need them, can't be asked to iron for hours on end, would sooner clean 100 rotten filthy loos any day of the week :giggle:

Hope you have a lovely Sunday sweetie and you had a fab catch up with your daughter

Take care lovely :hug99: xxxx

 

[tillymax]

:bighug: don't feel guilty lovely at the end of the day we were being honest weren't we, and yep hes made it all up to you (wish Matt would :giggle: ) but what we said was still true and made us both feel better to realise its teenage lads /well teenagers in general or a certain breed of them :8855: xxxxx

He's back to pretending I don't exist again

Comes in to give Tilly a huggles x

I like huggles

Tilly - I haven't got a diary! Can't think why anyone would want to read it. I haven't got much to say (except on everyone else's of course!) and I am rather shy actually! Also, I am just as fat as when I started - who wants to know about that?? Having said that, I have met lots of lovely people and it's nice to share stuff with other people. It's just that I share their's but not mine!

Po xxx

You'd be amazed how many people would read it if you ever decide to do a diary

Morning Tilly

Awww what a lovely lovely Son, all kids are a pain in the butt at times and boy when they are don't you just want to strangle them (at the very least :giggle but when they do something so lovely as what your Son did, you know you've got a good one and it washes away all the bad times

So lovely to hear you being more positive hun, 1 day at a time....oh and sod the ironing, I fold my clothes, put them in the draw or hang them in the wardrobe and iron them as I need them, can't be asked to iron for hours on end, would sooner clean 100 rotten filthy loos any day of the week :giggle:

Hope you have a lovely Sunday sweetie and you had a fab catch up with your daughter

Take care lovely :hug99: xxxx

It's all ironed. It won't be long until I have a load more cos I'm sure I'm doing the washing for the whole of Yorkshire at the moment


I've got the day to myself :clap:

Emma had a lovely time in London but was very tired. It was nice to have her home again.

My plan for today is to catch up on here, have a pamper session and read my book

 

[Mumma K]

That is a fab plan Tilly x

 

[tillymax]

Don't bother reading this, I just need to have a bit of a rant to get it off my chest.

One of my aunties visited today and she said something that has been annoying me. I won't go into detail cos it wasn't anything bad but it just made me wonder why everyone thinks they need to tell me what to do. Yes I know everyone has been worried about me but sometimes I'd just like to talk without people offering their opinions of what I should do.

Do people think I like feeling this way. The meds made me really anxious. I had got to the stage that I couldn't leave the house. I've been taking little steps and gradually things are improving. I know I've a long way to go before I find my way back to being me again but I really am trying to do everything I can.

So why does everyone seem to think they know what I should do. These are the things I get told constantly -

Go out
Stay in
Go back to work
Don't go back to work yet
I could add hundreds of things to this list

And the amount of people who want to meet up or go somewhere with me or ask me to tea when they know I'm struggling to get through the day is unbelievable. I know they are trying to help but I need to be able to do this my way and in my own time.

Rant over

 

[Lily42uk]

Hey sweetie, great rant and I mean that, getting it off your chest is good.

Ignore them if you can hun, you do what's right for you and ignore everyone, even me if you have to :cry:

I was the same as you and even now struggle with going out sometimes (although am 99% better) and had all the same things said to me, and to be honest I went sometimes when I really didn't want to, really wish I hadn't but can't turn back the clock, I just remember how Mal and the girls always got the brunt of it cos I felt i had to do what they wanted to keep the peace and then felt like carp after....I always also used to get told a lot by a certain person....oh why do you have to sound so miserable all the time (cos I am miserable and depressed a lot of the time :d'oh it just makes me think i don't want to hear it and then I don't want to phone, I used to think thanks for the support ...jeez

So hun doesn't matter how you feel or what you want to do, you do what's right for you and really discard what other well meaning souls want you to do, cos believe me doing it when you aren't ready to, will just push you back and all the little steps you've taken will all fall by the wayside.

Take care lovely and always know there are a whole lot of us that are only to willing to listen and give support, no matter what :bighug: xxxxxxxxx

 

[Mumma K]

Glad you got it off your chest Tilly
Unfortunately people are sometimes at a loss to know what to do or what to say and however well meaning there intentions are ...we end up with it getting on our wick....
No suggestions from me
Just a great big huggle and to say one day at a time lovely Tilly x

 

[broadsbean]

oh how i remember this, people still do it to me, if i am having a bad day and dont want to go out people keep saying oh dont slip back you have to keep going out

sometimes i just don't want to go out !!!!!!!!

do whats right for you tilly, thats what is important. you are doing fine xxxx

rants are sooooo good aren't they. i had loads but deleted most without posting just the writing it down helped. rant away honey xxxxx

 

[tillymax]

Hey sweetie, great rant and I mean that, getting it off your chest is good.

Ignore them if you can hun, you do what's right for you and ignore everyone, even me if you have to :cry:

I was the same as you and even now struggle with going out sometimes (although am 99% better) and had all the same things said to me, and to be honest I went sometimes when I really didn't want to, really wish I hadn't but can't turn back the clock, I just remember how Mal and the girls always got the brunt of it cos I felt i had to do what they wanted to keep the peace and then felt like carp after....I always also used to get told a lot by a certain person....oh why do you have to sound so miserable all the time (cos I am miserable and depressed a lot of the time :d'oh it just makes me think i don't want to hear it and then I don't want to phone, I used to think thanks for the support ...jeez

So hun doesn't matter how you feel or what you want to do, you do what's right for you and really discard what other well meaning souls want you to do, cos believe me doing it when you aren't ready to, will just push you back and all the little steps you've taken will all fall by the wayside.

Take care lovely and always know there are a whole lot of us that are only to willing to listen and give support, no matter what :bighug: xxxxxxxxx

It was a bad day yesterday and everything anyone said felt like a criticism. Hopefully today will be better

Glad you got it off your chest Tilly
Unfortunately people are sometimes at a loss to know what to do or what to say and however well meaning there intentions are ...we end up with it getting on our wick....
No suggestions from me
Just a great big huggle and to say one day at a time lovely Tilly x

I know people are only trying to help and I've probably done the same with others in the past and probably will in the future. It was just a bad day. Oh and by the way none of you lot have upset me. You don't tell me what to do, you offer me choices if that makes sense

oh how i remember this, people still do it to me, if i am having a bad day and dont want to go out people keep saying oh dont slip back you have to keep going out

sometimes i just don't want to go out !!!!!!!!

do whats right for you tilly, thats what is important. you are doing fine xxxx

rants are sooooo good aren't they. i had loads but deleted most without posting just the writing it down helped. rant away honey xxxxx

I've got visions of you having a nice relaxing today at home cos it's what you want to do and then people come along and drag you out cos they think you're crackers. Don't plan any face masks just incase you're dragged out - you'll look a bu**er

I might try typing and not posting - sounds good

My mums coming after work but I don't think we'll get drunk today cos she's going away for a few days tomorrow and if she has hangover she won't enjoy her trip.

To change my meds I have to take the ones I'm on at a lower dose for a while and then move onto the new ones. I've had the lower dose for almost a week now and I've started to notice the anxiety levels are lessening but the depression is building. You can't win can you. I only let you all know cos I don't want you to think I'm being miserable if I start seeing the down side in everything. I've got another week to go and then I start the new happy pills. I hope they don't have side effects that make me feel like sh*t.

I'm gonna go and do my nails in a minute. It won't take long cos I haven't got any

 

[Mumma K]

I'm gonna go and do my nails in a minute. It won't take long cos I haven't got any

:giggle: You nutter

Morning Tilly

Hope you have a nice time with your mum
even if it is minus the little drinkie
huggles to you

 

[ginlin]

Morning Tilly x

Have a good day, even if no drinkies with your Mum.

 

[Lily42uk]

Hello lovely, hope you're ok today...I do my nails and I don't have any either...is that strange then ? :giggle:
A change of meds will most likely make you feel strange(r) :giggle:, but hopefully it will all be ok, I am trying my tabs at a new dose (same tabs new dose) and within a couple of hours of changing my lip has come up in 2 massive sores, wonderful eh.....was gonna say I wish we could be normal, but I think we are :8855:

Have a nice evening sweetie :hug99: xxxx

 

[JackieN]

awww Tilly :bighug: :bighug: you can't win can you :bighug: :bighug: I'm not going to tell you what to do :giggle: cos thats not acceptable , but just don't listen to them, do what Chris used to do when he was little stick your fingers in your ears and repeat 'I'm not listening, I'm not listening' :giggle; seriously :bighug: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[Lily42uk]

Hey sweetie, hope you are having a good day my lovely
Have you changed tabs yet?
You know what tell them moaning minnies to p*ss off and tell them I said so if you like :giggle: at least you can blame it on me :8855:

Miss you loads lovely :bighug: xxxxxx

 

[Mumma K]

Hugs to you Tilly xx

 

[Purple Patsy]

Hope you're doing OK Tilly It's a lomg raod and uphill a lot of the time but you'll get there,

 

[broadsbean]

hello happy easter, hope everybody has let you get on with whats right for you xxx

:bighug:

 

[Mumma K]

Hello lovely funny Tilly

Just wanted to wish you a
Happy Easter huni
xx

 

[Purple Patsy]

Hope you're doing grand Tilly enjoy those eggs.