ugh i couldnt do it

Discussion in 'Cambridge Weight Plan' started by nurseberyl, 25 January 2011 Social URL.

  1. nurseberyl

    nurseberyl Full Member

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    I was cooking the kids dinner, and ate some pasta and a sausage, i hate myself right now. I was so mad at myself I was snapping at the kids, then took it out on the back gate swearing all sorts as it wouldnt open! I really feel so guilty I could cry. im only on day 2 if i cant get past day 2 how will I do 12 weeks or whatever I need to do... so mad :cry:
     
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  3. Goreygirl

    Goreygirl Gold Member

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    Honey... first of all breathe!!!

    OK....now you have taken a breathe .. relax and stop being so hard on yourself about this. We have all done this and the trick is not to get into a tizz about it otherwise you will drive yourself to more eating.

    You need to put it in perspective.. this is a journey not a race and the more negative you get about what is happening the harder you will make it for yourself hon.

    Forgive yourself. Admit you made a mistake. Forgive yourself. Be very, very kind to yourself: Beating yourself up or criticizing you won’t make you change. Compassion and regret (not shame – there is a difference!) can.

    Acknowledge the emotions you are feeling and how negative and self-defeating they are.. then let them go. Give yourself self acceptance. It’s easy to offer yourself approval when you’re on your “best” behavior. But when you make mistakes? Do you offer yourself love and support at those times, as well? It’s ironic that these low times are when we need our approval the most. Without our approval, we feel bereft, judged, unacceptable. We feel unlovable and not okay.
    When we’re in this space, it’s very easy to go back to overeating because we’re feeling so badly about ourselves. Self-acceptance is what breaks the chain, so that you stop after one mistake, instead of piling them up, one after the other, until you hit rock bottom. Your unconditional love creates a safe container for you to change. It is what enables you to put the fork down and ask yourself, “What is really going on here?” and shift.

    Have a starting over ritual. Showering, bathing, walking, brushing your teeth: any thing that signals to you that you are starting over, starting afresh or anew is helpful after a slip. I write out my feelings as part of my ritual. I get out my notebook and write down: “I am angry…,” “I am sad/regretful…”, “I am frustrated…” This emotional housecleaning feels so good. I then offer myself compassion and forgiveness: I love you so much even though you slipped up. I am proud of you for getting back on track. I am hopeful that you can love and care for yourself. I’m not a horrible person because I messed up; I’m merely human. (I know this sounds a bit "twee" but it really does work!! We hardly ever give ourselves care and compassion but frequently give ourself criticism and self-hate)

    You did the right thing coming on here because it helped you get it out of your head; we can often distance ourselves from people when we have slipped up.. isolating ourselves from the very sympathetic ears that we so need instead.

    When you’re ready, examine what happened. Slip usare fabulous learning opportunities. Try and examine what was going on: how were you feeling beforehand? What thoughts were running through your head? What expectations or "shoulds" ran the show? Write/think about the event and see if you can make sense of it. This can help you prepare for the next time. Think of how you can support yourself next time so that you can act differently.


    I really hope this helps... it's what I have learnt on my CD journey over the last few months (with the help of some wise people on here).
     
  4. nurseberyl

    nurseberyl Full Member

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    Thanks Gg - that really helped. Im going to keep going tomorrow, have not eaten anything else just had water. I think cooking dinner is the worst part of the day for me, it was utter hell x
     
  5. MinnieMel

    MinnieMel Why Be Normal?

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    GG's advice is spot on. And, Beryl I did no cooking and left th kitchen for the first fives days I was on this diet. It was only after I was well and truly into ketosis that I could deal with the cooking, food smells, etc.

    MM
     
  6. nurseberyl

    nurseberyl Full Member

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    Thanks MM. Unfortunately I have to do all the cooking as its only me here. This would be a great time for a husband or at least a live in boyfriend ;)
     
  7. Rorah

    Rorah Mooooooo

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    Don't worry, we know it feels awful when we feel we've "cheated" and we all know how hard the first couple of days are! Stay strong, keep drinking, and before you know it you'll be into day three and four and then you won't feel the hunger anymore! x
     
  8. nurseberyl

    nurseberyl Full Member

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    Thanks Rorah. Im off to bed before I do any more damage! cant believe Im going to bed at half 8! x
     
  9. Goreygirl

    Goreygirl Gold Member

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    Could you split one of your shakes and have that to sip on when you are cooking maybe? Or some other technique .. sipping water? Ice chips?
     
  10. nurseberyl

    nurseberyl Full Member

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    I will try splitting tomorrow gg. And will def have one on the go while cooking dinner, I've learnt my lesson!! Just discovered the iPhone app, fab! X
     
  11. Small_Jaxy

    Small_Jaxy Full Member

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    Agree with all the above, we have all been there, myself more times than i would like to admit lol!

    keep ya chin up u will get there!! x x x
     
  12. MinnieMel

    MinnieMel Why Be Normal?

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    @Beryl -- Another thing that helps me, is to cook foods the the family likes and I don't. Sometimes i wonder how I got fat because I am so picky. But, then I guess I ate a lot of what I did like! LOL

    MM
     
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