Understanding Why?

[Sass]

Thought i would put this question out there to see if anyone else has done the same thing as me......

I last did this diet in feb and since then pilled on 3 stone in 6 months. I know it was all my fault and not because i lost weight fast. I was 100% greedy and ate myself silly. Its this i need to understand and deal with in time for when i reach my goal weight.

My CDC was really shocked to see how much i had put on and said she couldn't understand it. When i told her why i thought i had done it she basically said she didn't buy my reasons and thought i was really crazy to have done this to myself.

For me i think i put the weight back on because i was at a point with my weight that was the lowest i had been forever. I have never been into dieting and my lowest weight was 15st 7lbs from 20st. I lost that weight in around 7 months last year. At that point i felt great, my confidence was back and i was finding it increasingly hard to stick to CD, i came off and tried WW but i felt so good that dieting wasn't my main focus anymore. I then had many months of trying to get back to CD without any joy until finally i thought well thats me, i cant do this anymore, just be happy. I then went onto just being sensible around food until i started to feel bigger and then i was on a massive downward spiral which has lead me to where i am now. I would eat for the sake of it. End up feeling sick, going to bed with heartburn and feeling really rough due to totally over doing it. I was in total greed mode. So here i am now back to my heaviest weight and on my 4th day of my restart but this time i want it to be different. I want to understand why i did what i did for me to ensure it doesn't happen again.

Is there anyone else out there who went and put on after CD and what drove you to sabotage your past efforts to lose the weight in the first place? I Would love to read peoples story's on this.

 

[Fat-Boy-Slimmin]

I lost just over 3 stone last year, but then had a health issue which meant I had to stop Cambridge. I did okay for a short time, but then I let everything return to my old habits and put most of the weight back on. Even after my health getting back to a relatively stable point, I still didn’t have the sense or the motivation to get back on to Cambridge. I knew it worked for me, but there was always a reason or an excuse to put it off. The excuses were petty ones, but they were really fuelled by the deeper reasons. I won't go in to them, because I don't feel that a public forum is really the place for me to do so.

Basically, if we are not mentally prepared to see the weight loss through to our goal and then also ensure we re-program our thinking and our relationship with food, there isn’t really much chance of being successful.

We all have other things going on in our lives besides dieting, so there are many things that can affect our progress. What is important to realise is that most of these things are going to happen regardless of if we are on a diet or maintaining our weight or not.

Our own thoughts, feelings and problems can be a major hurdle at any point. But realising that a lot of it is most likely related to the fact that we are overweight, means that losing the weight and maintaining that loss will be a major step towards putting most of that behind us and working towards a happier and healthier future.

 

[KD]

Okay, I didn't put on after Cambridge, but I put on after all the other diets, over and over again. Right from my teens until my late 40's.

I tried the same as you. I tried being happy whilst obese. But it didn't work. I put on more and was plagued with sleep apnea, swollen legs, tiredness etc My husband was so sure he was going to find me dead one morning when he woke up

So this was my last chance. And this time was different. The aim wasn't so much on losing the weight as focusing on how I was going to maintain. I just wanted to maintain...at first, just maintain any weight! But of course, I couldn't maintain my bigger weight because I hated being that size. It was uncomfortable. It was life threatening

My goal weight was my starting line, rather than the finishing line. It was when the work had to start. It's not where it finished. Dieting was easy peasy in comparison, but it had to be done.

How have I done it? I've wanted it much more than I wanted to put the weight back on. Seems obvious doesn't it, but not so. Well, it wasn't obvious when I 'failed' the main times before, because I wanted to overeat more than I didn't, and I just new that one overeating session wasn't going to make be put on loads. But it just kept happening

I learnt that gaining the weight back wasn't going to be a sudden thing. It would be bit by bit, and if that happened I could address it before it became a big deal, as long as I didn't put my head in the sand.

But that was only the first step. I soon learnt that it wasn't as easy as that. It wasn't just one decision to stay away from the toast (which I don't by the way...have some each day ). It was making a infinite number of arguably insignificant decisions and trying to get most of them right.

But most of all, I had to really want it. Want it more than anything else. And when I didn't feel I could care, I had to pretend I did to get me through. No massive celebration at goal (did a bigger one for 5 years at goal) because as I say, that's the starting line.

That's how it worked for me anyway

 

[16to10]

One of my biggest worries is reaching my target weight and then putting all the weight (and more) back on again.

If this happened to you, could you tell me how long it took for you to gain the weight again? Does it happen really quickly because your body isn't used to that much food and pretty much stores it as fat?

 

[oxfordruse]

Sass, I recognise so much of what you're going through. I'm on Day 4 of my first restart and still struggling to answer the question 'why'. Why did I sabotage myself so badly?

Cambridge is wonderful, it works, and it gives people renewed confidence. But I also think that confidence can be its pitfall: once we've lost some weight and seen the results it can give, when we finally do eat something 'naughty', it bothers us less, because at the back of our mind we think 'Well, I can always go back on Cambridge.' That psychology doesn't fit for all, of course, but it was certainly the case for me.

Anyway, here's my story in a nutshell:

- From April 2008 to December 2008, I went from 20st 10lb to 12st 7lb on SS. That's an 8st 3lb loss.

- Somewhat miraculously, I managed to keep this off until December 2009 - a whole year! - without ever going above 13st 7lb. I thought I was done; I'd succeeded. But what I never acknowledged was that I wasn't maintaining properly - I did it through a combination of SS, GoLower, Atkins and whatever else would bring my weight down when it started to creep up. I hadn't really changed my habits at all.

- At the end of 2009, I moved to London. Well, that was it. I completely forgot Cambridge, started enjoying my newfound social life to the max (which, of course, is what I had Cambridge to thank for in the first place - being slim gives you confidence and new social freedom), and went to restaurants, coffee shops, cafes, bistros and bars galore for months.

- The inevitable happened: slowly, over time (I'm still kicking myself that I never really noticed), my lifestyle caught up with me and the weight started to come back. As it did, my confidence dipped to a commensurate level until I stopped going out and started comfort eating again; so, of course, my weight went up even faster. I'm now 17st 10lb.

So there it is. WHY did I do that?! I'm still trying to figure that out. But, to end on a positive, this is what I'm going to do:

- Use the period on SS to contemplate, and seriously analyse my thought processes.

- Not kick myself for undoing most of the first attempt. Rarely do we succeed in life just trying something once. I'm older and wiser, and I can rectify my mistakes.

- Commit myself to saying that this is my first and final restart. By that, I mean that I'll move up the steps faithfully, won't abandon my counsellor once the weight's lost, and will always remember how gutting it felt to have undone a lot of my hard work.

Stick in there, Sass. Like me, you want to understand the reasons behind it all; as much as anything, I'm curious to see how this time will be different, and I'm actually looking forward to the journey!

 

[WW_Newbie86]

I started last year and tbh i tried other diets but never really did them jus done them for a week, it wasnt until after i had my daughter i realised how much i weighed and wow wasnt expecting it. I lost 16lbs and after that it all went wrong i think i had my priorities all messed up! If i wanted food i would go out my way to get it and if i was asked to go out i wouldnt even hesitate or need to be convinced and thats the problem i could never get back on it!
I love my food so always thought 1 day wont hurt but it did cos a year later ive put on all the weight and more.
I have managed to lose 8lbs in preparing for my restart and now i will do it i think its about having the right frame of mind to start and learning and supporting yourself during it and its like a restart in ur mind aswell..

well im hoping so anyway lol good luck x

 

[Sass]

wow thank you all so much for taking the time to reply. Its very interesting reading peoples story's.

Now on my 2nd proper restart i can clearly see that sticking to CD is the easy part. Changing my 31 year old habits and lifestyle for the future is the hard part. Understanding why for me is one step closer to fixing this issue i have with food.

I ordered Dr.Becks cognitive therapy book which came today, i have only ready the intro but looks like it may be of some real use to me. Maybe of some use to some of you peeps who are also trying to work through this on a mental level also.

KD - Its people like you who do manage to keep the weight lost on CD off that keeps me going down this path. Its so important to know that it does work long term as long as you move up the steps and change your habits etc.

oxfordruse - I like your positive points and like you will use this time to understand why and make sure that this time we stay slim forever! Your story is so like mine but as long as we stay determined we will get there. Well done so far.

FBS - I also agree feelings and emotions do play a big part in being the way i am with food but i suppose these emotions will also need to be dealt with in time too.

Who would have thought going on a blooming diet would drag up all this deep thinking! My brain hurts pmsl
Hmmmm this time last year i wouldn't have said that, last year it was JUST a diet to get slim. Thats one thing i'm doing differently this time.

16to10 - You will be just fine as long as you work up the plans and realise that this has got to be a life changer to work (in a good way of course). I gained 3 stone in 6 months but believe me when i say i ate my self silly. I don't like admitting that but thats what i did!

small_jaxy - well done on the 8lb loss, here's to many more pounds shed from you!

Well i'm off to bed now to read some of my Dr.Becks so hope she holds the key to a slim forever life for me. Though i know deep down i'm the one with the key!!

 

[Chlo]

This was a great post, as it all happened to me too. I lost 6 stone up until Easter and then decided to swap to WW (big mistake), and it was a case of give me an inch and I will take a mile, and I have put 2 and a half stone back on... though in fairness to weightwatchers I have eaten like a pig (it didn't go on doing the diet). I seem to have no off switch.

I am now restarting... though am trying SS+/810 as I can't face SS at the moment. I have also bought the Dr Beck's Cognitive Therapy Book, to try and prevent it happening again. I got the workbook with loads of different activities for me to do.

Fingers crossed this time round will be it for all of us.

 

[MsJMC]

first , I think your cdc should not say ......My CDC was really shocked to see how much i had put on and said she couldn't understand it. When i told her why i thought i had done it she basically said she didn't buy my reasons and thought i was really crazy to have done this to myself.
She needs to support you , I feel if these were her words , I'd look for another CDC .
I did have a big weight gain last year , my mum passed away , and at the time you really don't think straight until you can get your head in the right place and sort it out ... i'm unsure about way it happened to you , sometimes people do that but can't see why they did that .
Do some soul searching and see what you come up with ....
Hope you do well and stay posting for support ...