Wibbly Wobbly Start

[Nymple]

'lo Everyone,

I'm Nym, I'm 28 currently residing in Birmingham, I want to lose 5 and a half stone. I'm an emotional eater with crisps being my danger area

I did SW a few years ago and lost a few stone and was overjoyed. Then work changed my hours and I could no longer attend group and it all went downhill and I totally lost focus and put nearly all the weight I lost back on again over the course of 2 years.

So after a discussion with my bf over Christmas about me wanting babies (where he told me his concerns with a pregnancy at my weight (in a supportive and worried about me way, not just being mean!)) I then also discovered that you have to have extra tests and checks... Boo to that!

So here I am, back again. I restarted on the 3rd of Jan although I am currently not attending group as it's a bit of a trek (and a £5 train journey) to get to my nearest one.

So I worked my bum off all last week and then... only lost a 1lb and 0 inches (I'm measuring too). I was a bit peeved at that for a first week loss, not least because I have set myself a target of 1.5lbs a week and worked out if I stick with it that it'll take me a year almost to the day to reach my PAT target... and still didn't reach my first week goal I've reminded myself that it is just a guide now though, marked out 1/2 stone and mini targets and dug out some stickers to reward myself as strangely I think it helps and not going to group is hard!

However I figured I should probably start a diary too as it'll help me stay on track... also if I have another unremarkable loss this week, I can post my food diary and get ideas on where I can improve my losses Any help would be massively appreciated!

I'm pretty determined to stick with it even if my loss is slow though, I'm fed up of being uncomfortable all the time.

I'll need reminding of that though in a few weeks when I'm struggling so that's why I am so pleased to have found this forum with all of you lovely people in it...

 

[Maverick]

Good luck with it

I'm sure having something as exciting as trying for a baby should be the best reward and a great motivator for you. And having a supportive OH will definitely help xx

 

[Nymple]

Thanks Maverick, I hope so!

 

[Judehb]

Good luck!!

 

[Nymple]

Talkative Today

Thanks Judehb

I have been rereading my old magazines for added inspiration and recipe ideas lately. In the March/April 2009 magazine Margaret's Column bit is "Is your inner rebel stopping you slimming?" whereby when we use words like "should", "must" or "ought" our subconscious turns on the teenager and rebels... Sabotaging our weight loss by telling us to cast off the "should" and do what we want.

Every month or two, this is something I do. Suddenly just have a desperate need for an utter blow out where I even cast off flexible syns and just eat whatever I want for a day or meal without counting or making any effort to stay in control. Margaret advocates writing a "for and against" list about being slim to discover your internal sabotage system.

So I started doing this exercise. The "For" part was easy enough but the "against" column is a struggle. As it's an exercise in discovering your inner rebel I started to think about when I first started to gain weight and why I made no effort to tackle the problem for over 10 years.

I think my inner rebel isn't a rebel at all. I think she's a little girl who is scared of attention. Basically it all boils down to shyness... and boobs. I was painfully shy as a child. I'd dread having to talk to anyone I didn't know and would blush and stutter if I had to. I don't remember my breasts growing just, KAPOW! Like they popped up overnight like a whack-a-mole. From flat chested to the biggest chested girl in the school. For a shy person, this was the worst thing that could happen to me. I wanted people not to notice me at all, not sing Birmful of Asha at me as I walked down the halls... "Everybody needs a bosom for a pillow..." or my friends telling me that I need to get a proper bra and bigger shirts as I desperately tried to ignore the fact that I had changed.

I always kidded myself that the weight came with the boobs, like a hormonal imbalance caused me to put on weight. However looking back now, I notice the Sausage and chips for school lunch, Chicken Nuggets and Chips for dinner (Dad worked abroad, Mum worked long hours so I had to cook for myself and was clueless so it was all freezer fodder!) and a Mountain Dew and Cheesy Puff addiction fed by the shop on the way to and from school.

I am an emotional eater and I do remember being miserable so part of it was that and this all might be poppycock. However part of me thinks that the weight was something to hide behind. It was far easier for me to be called a "fat cow" once or twice a week, and then be ignored, than suffer the boys in my class taunting me, singing at me and drawing attention to me every single day.

My "Against" list therefore was always going to be doomed as I'm not shy any more. I don't need anything to hide behind. I just need to keep reminding myself that I have the confidence to deal with any bumps along the way now

Haha, sorry for the ramble but this is my diary and I had that epiphany whilst lying in bed last night and wanted to document it so I'm more likely to remember when I need decide I need a whole heap of junk food.

Today though my menu is as follows:

Breakfast: Cheese (HEa), Bacon, Onion, Mushroom and Sweetcorn Omelette (When my little Tesco's opens and I can go and buy eggs)

Lunch: Home made Tomato & Balsamic Red Onion Soup (Proper Yummy) 0.5 Syns

Dinner: Sloppy Joes (HEb) and SW Chips (Veg either in the Sloppy Joe mix or on the side) 0.5 Syns in the book but I might add BBQ Sauce so maybe 1.5 Syns

Snacks: Undecided. I need to stock up on low to medium syn treats

I'm quite looking forward to my grub today

 

[Spanx]

Good luck Nymple - you sound like you are really motivated and determined, which is half the battle! I don't go to group either - this forum is my support group and I hope you will find it just as inspiring for your journey!

 

[Nymple]

Thanks Spanx. As long as I can stay determined...

You are doing really well! If I am doing half so well as you in 6 months I shall be pleased and impressed with myself

 

[Nymple]

Woo Hoo! This week I lost 3lbs and 3.5 Inches

I'm so unbelievably chuffed

My plan for Sloppy Joes failed yesterday as I wasn't too hungry and felt too lazy to cook so I just made noodles instead. I've just had the Joes now. They were good, although I wish I had invested in better quality Lean Mince

I was supposed to be doing a Davina workout then lazing tonight however I got a call last night that ruined my very relaxed plans. About 6 months ago I signed up to volunteer with St Johns Ambulance after doing a first aid at work course and enjoying it. It's taken ages as the training coordinator is apparently not great at his job but... Last night at just gone 9pm, I got a call about attending my first course. It's Life Support (CPR) which I have done before but I figured a refresher would be good and if I said no I might never hear from the incredibly disorganised organiser ever again. Therefore tonight I am spending between 7.30-9.30 learning. Woo! I hope we don't do baby CPR this week, the dummy freaks me out... although not as much as the prospect of ever having to use the knowledge!

Anywho, I need a YAY Weigh Day Treat now... I fancy a mini twister. I do love my Iced Lollies Alas I have none in the house and don't have time to hunt for one in my local shops so I shall have to do without, for now

 

[xyandz]

oooo, if you like iced lollies could you not make your own syn free ones with sugar free squash??
Not quite the same as a twister but good for when you're not treating yourself!

btw, congrats on your 3lbs and 3inches! I just realised I never measured myself....where's that tape measure!?!

 

[Nymple]

Hi xyz,

I could make my own but they really aren't as good. I haven't been using many syns any way and mini Twisters (both the choc and fruit ones) are only 2.5 syns. I just need to find somewhere that has them now

Instead I bought myself diet pepsi as a treat. I try to stick to water or sugar free squash during the week so it feels like a treat even though its syn free

I found measuring makes a big difference as some weeks I wouldn't lose much or stay the same and still lose inches so it helps keep you motivated when the scales aren't your friend I measure my bust, hips, waist, arms, legs and knees. Last time I did SW I lost 2st but more amazingly I lost 32 inches from the areas above. Even if you don't do it every week, it's still totally worth it

 

[Nymple]

Oh No

So I had a bit of a slip up yesterday. On Tuesday I decided that I would use flexible syns and have oven chips and chicken goujons for my dinner. For the first time ever in my history of slimming world though, I stayed in control. I set a limit and kept count and stuck to that limit. The next day was a revelation... I didn't feel guilty or like I had cheated myself like I usually would. I just felt like it was part of the journey and that I had needed it.

It was all going so well and then... Quorn Mini Eggs. I had it in my head that these were 0.5 syns each from last time I did SW. So I bought a big pack of them and whilst I was cooking I scoffed 3! When I went to put them in my food diary I checked online and SHOCKHORROR! 2.5 syns each. I had been perilously close to the 15 syn line before and now I had tumbled over it.

I was gutted, annoyed with myself and worse... felt that I had "Wrecked it". I will admit that I then proceeded to sulk for a couple of hours and maybe fell off the wagon a little (but not much) more. I fixed it then though with the aid of a slimming world magazine and some "Don't be so hard on yourself" thinking. For which, I am rather proud

A rocky start to the week but I feel that both using my flexi syns deliberately and accidentally has actually helped make me feel more in control and determined. If I can talk myself out of my destructive "Wrecked It!" mood then I can probably do anything! Haha Woo Hoo :clap:

In other news... Dinner tonight is a Butternut Squash & Mixed Veg risotto served with a swirl of a cream cheese with chive (Philly). :drool:

 

[Nymple]

I have just spent the weekend at my boyfriends house. He currently lives with his parents and I find it so hard to stick to plan when I go there.

His Family are all quite slim and there is chocolate, crisps, biscuits, pies and desserts all over the place. This is made worse by my bf's dad who acts like I am bringing a disease into his house by mentioning the word slimming (whilst eyeing up my slimming world meals and making snide comments about my portion sizes). For a while I continued to eat with the family as often they'd have spaghetti bolognese or sheppards pie which weren't too high on syns. However then I discovered that my bfs dad was deliberately adding butter, cream, whole milk, fat or oil to all the meals. So I'd ask if I could have my roasties done in fry light instead of goose fat (yes, goose fat every week) to lower the syns, and he'd agree and act helpful. Then after eating it I'll find he added a huge knob of butter to the vegetables. Which is twice as bad, "real" butter sets off my IBS in about 2 seconds flat.

Therefore I started saying that I would sort my own meals out. However the dad is such an awkward person that he'd insist I wasn't using the kitchen at the same time as him, which meant I couldn't time my meal to be ready at the same time and eat with them. This weekend, my bf said he would eat with me and made a real effort to understand the plan and cook me SW friendly meals, which was great. I'm really pleased that he is making such an effort to understand food optimising and help me stick with it. However it still wasn't easy and I went over my syns at least once and I already flexed my syns this week.

Watching other people scoff chocolate bars and cream cakes with ice cream whilst you are trying to be good is really really hard!

Despite the fact that I went for an ultra sound at lunch time and wasn't allowed to eat beforehand... I suspect the scales won't be my friend this evening but I'm just trying to remind myself that I still did my best to stick to plan even if I didn't succeed the whole time. Also that I'm staying in my flat next weekend so I can have a 100% week to make up for the struggle I have had this weekend!

I don't know for certain that I've had a bad week but I wondered if any of you have good tips for how to stay out of the doldrums and to keep your head in the game after a less than successful week when your morale is a bit low? :sigh:

 

[Nymple]

I need not have worried. Lost 3lbs and 4 inches.

I'm making a promise to myself to have a 100% week this week to prevent the naughtiness of last week catching up with me though!

Just spent 2 hours at St John's Ambulance training rolling round on the floor and doing CPR.... reckon that counts as Body Magic?

 

[Nymple]

Carrot Burgers

Today I attempted a recipe I found online for Carrot Burgers. They turned out well, despite a slip with the salt shaker, Oops! I'm impressed. Essentially its carrot (diced and boiled for 5 mins to soften), onion, celery, egg and bran flakes (with sweetner, salt and pepper) all mixed together, made into patties. I found the patties quite sloppy but I just plonked them in the heated fry lighted pan and left them for 3 mins or so then flipped. I think next time I will add some mashed sweet or normal potato and sweetcorn or peas. That way it'll stick together better so I can leave out the bran flakes, be extra yummy and fill me up with lots of free veg

Kind of similar to the Bird's Eye Vegetable Fingers which I love but minus the breadcrumbs and any syns

Sausage Casserole tonight, off on a mission for WW Sausages after hearing people on here say they are yummy and finding out they are only half a syn each. Any other suggestions of yummy low fat sausages for if I can't find the WW ones?

 

[Maverick]

Well done on your losses so far, you are doing really well. It must be really hard with your bfs dad being less than helpful. I can't understand why anyone would want to stand in the way of someone else's health and happiness. At least you have the support of your bf tho, he sounds great. My bf can't really get his head around SW, but he is trying.

I know what you mean about watching other people scoff chocolate too, my bf inhales chocolate and it annoys me so much as I'm sure he doesn't even taste it. I had my first piece of chocolate last night (curly wurly) and I savoured every mouthful. And I felt like I deserved it which helped! xx

 

[Nymple]

Thank you very much. It sounds weird but I feel differently about SW and my weight loss now than I did the first time. It feels permanent and almost inevitable this time. It's hard but my bf's dad isn't shaking me as much because of that. By making the move to eat separately, I feel a bit rude, but it's totally the right thing for me! That doesn't mean I understand why he is such an unhelpful meanie though

My bf is great, he doesn't really understand it yet either but he's making the effort to check with me before just adding stuff to food. Although as he is quite slim and not doing SW with me officially it's still hard, as they have so many naughty habits in his house! Snacks and puddings with cream and fresh white bread cut thickly and smeared with butter... Sometimes I'm fine and other times my food stops being as appetising as it was 2 minutes before

Yes, a family pack of minstrels or malteasers can disappear very quickly in my boyfriends hands too... I had a Fudge yesterday myself... I also spent ages savouring it. I think you do enjoy it more that way and feeling like you deserve it is also a big enjoyment boost too.

A finger of fudge is just enough to give your [strike]kids[/strike] self a treat

 

[Nymple]

Blah

This week I stayed the same and I don't really know how to feel about that. On the one hand, I worked my butt off and did increasingly strenuous workouts every other day this week. On the other I went over my syns one day this week and 3 days last so it could just be catching up to me. Plus muscle weighs more than fat and I feel like I went for it this week and maybe have built muscle. I'm going to settle on feeling slight disappointment and a boat load of determination that it WILL show next week

I didn't have time to measure last night as I came home, rushed to make a SW friendly dinner, jumped on the scales, scoffed said SW dinner and ran back out the door. Most of me feels like the measurements is where my hard work will have shown up. I was tempted to re-WI and Measure properly tonight but instead I think I'm going to draw a line under it, have the 100% week I failed to have last week and hope the scales are more friendly next Monday.

I surprised myself with how well I kept up with the Exercise DVDs though. However I do wonder if anyone else has slower weight loss when they exercise? Am I doing the wrong type of exercise? It seems unlikely as all three DVD's I used are all aimed at weight loss with yesterday mornings DVD being The Biggest Loser's Jillian Michaels Last Chance Workout... which is specifically aimed at shedding a few lbs before weigh in!

 

[EmmyLou30]

You might find you lose inches if not pounds. I've had weeks where I've stayed the same weight but noticed my trousers get a bit looser as my belly catches up with the scales!

That's awful about your boyfriends Dad sabotaging you like that. Naturally thin people just don't get it do they and comments like 'one meal won't hurt, go on' really don't help. I am becoming more forceful like you and realising it's my life at the end of the day and I'm losing weight for me so actually I am going to turn down that cake or biscuit or second helping as politely as possible and not feel guilty.

I used to eat at my parents every Saturday night. Often takeaways. They're cutting down too so no more takeaways but it's still a high syn meal no matter how healthy it appears. I now take my own tea round (like Asda chickpea dahl as it's syn free and quick to catch up to her already half cooked meal) while my boyfriend has the same as them. I was made to feel guilty to start with like I was turning my nose up at her food but I think she's slowly understanding that my diet dictates what I can and can't have and I'm serious about losing it this time.

Doesn't stop her saying my loses on their wii fit are down to my clothes being lighter each week! My boyfriend thinks she's jealous as she's the biggest she's ever been and I'm 3 stone down already.

Good luck with your losses and I'm sure you'll do it as you seem totally focussed. x

 

[Nymple]

Thanks EmmyLou, I definitely do think I lost inches despite the scales this week. Walking home from work today my comfy big knickers fell down under my trousers! haha Shocking! So glad no one could see but I was still torn between being embarrassed and laughing myself silly

At Rich's house I get a double dose as his dad is snide and sabotaging and his mother is a determined "A little bit of cake won't hurt" person. I understand her view point a bit more but it still makes it almost impossible to stick to food optimising 100% when I'm there... then I feel annoyed and ashamed of myself when I'm home again, regretting my weaknesses.

I had to stop eating with them in the long run as it was definitely a case of high syn despite healthy appearance with every meal. So even when I thought I'd been good, I was getting poor losses.

Congrats on standing up to your parents and insisting that you need to eat separately. Especially having a touchy mother getting bothered about it! Well done for sticking to your guns! Also is the Chickpea Dahl from Asda nice? I'm always slightly weary of things like that in tins fearing high syns or just gross food.

Haha, I'm not sure that any clothes weigh 3 stone! She probably is a bit jealous. I presume you've already tried explaining food optimising to her? Maybe she could join in and that'd help you on Saturdays I know some people can be as stubborn as mules though when it comes to weight especially as it has to be their choice or they won't stick with it.

Thanks for the luck! I hope you stick with it and hit your target too

 

[Nymple]

Down

I feel pretty down this week and haven't been able to stick to plan. It started after my Monday weigh in... Although I did alright I felt for the effort I had put in and the sheer amount I sweated for the last 2 weeks I should have seen a bigger loss or at least a few inches off. Instead I got 2lbs and half an inch. Usually I'd be happy but I'm just so gutted that I put in such a phenomenal effort and got worse results than if I'd slobbed on the sofa and just Food Optimised for two weeks.

So Monday after weigh in I pigged out a bit. Both yesterday and today there has been cake at work. Yesterday I had a tiny chocolate cake and I shouldn't have so that put me over syns. I gave myself a talking to and woke up all determined this morning and was doing well, then I got a bit unknowingly (and a bit knowingly on my part) sabotaged.

A girl at work brought 2 cakes into work that her mum had baked. A chocolate one and a Victoria sponge cake with yellow goo filling. She said her mum, who avidly follows slimming world had told her the sponge was syn free. Now I knew, knew, KNEW that it looked to good to be true. I held out for 2 hours, maintaining that I didn't think it was syn free and that I didn't want any. I really really did want it though. Plus I had 3 other slimming world ladies at work egging me on "You've been so good, it's syn free, go on!" I should have stuck with my gut but I caved! After my first bite, I knew it had syns but figured she maybe got confused and didn't realised flour was syns so I set aside 5-8 syns in my head for it, figuring it wouldn't be too bad if she had intended it to be low syn. But NO, her daughter had not picked up on the sarcasm in the text informing her it was "Syn-free" :cry: I pretty much had to write off all my syns for the day on it. Which then had a knock on effect as my dinner had syns so what was the point in spending ages cooking etc etc

I knew it really was too much like cake to be syn free and should have stuck to my guns. However I just feel so down and unable to get my motivation back that I'm really beating myself up. To top it all I spoke to my mum who was positive and telling me to brush it off, that a star week could mess things up and to stop dwelling and get back to plan. This just made me really REALLY angry (which probably means she is right and my hormones are ruling me at the moment! )

I've kept up with the exercise as despite being disappointed, I worked my bum off this evening with a Jillian Michaels DVD). Plus I'm tailoring my workouts for weight loss so figure that my body will eventually catch up. Still though I just feel so down and unable to recapture my mojo as I'm feeling that I've wrecked it . I know I haven't... that I will get back on track, but I don't really want to leave it any longer to do so as if I work hard I might not see damage next Monday at weigh in.

What do you lot do to snap yourself out of it, when you have had a knock and get that "I've wrecked it!" feeling? It's one of the hardest things for me and I always give in and indulge that feeling even if it's just for a short while. I need to find a different coping mechanism to comfort eating and I don't really know where to start! Help!?:sigh: