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ww - my only sanity.

#1
I'm having a really hard time at the moment. I've been signed off work for the past week thanks to stress and depression. I'm utterly exhausted, crying at everything all the time.
Through all of this though, im so grateful to ww. Normally when i get down i eat everything I can get my hands on but I've been sticking to my points and working really hard. It feels like food is the one thing I can control at the moment. I still want chocolate and comfort food but I'm looking for low point versions or just not demolishing an entire bar of whole nut.
Anyone else with experience? Things have exploded recently but I'm so glad I'm finally going to get some help.
 
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#2
Hi anj,

I might now a little about what you're going through. Two years ago I had to leave my job for the same reason. I went to counseling which was really helpful. Colleagues and friends might have the best intentions but dont really have the same insight or compassion. I found at the start when I was just taking time out from my work de-stress that head office was understanding but at the same time they have money to make, so I had to leave entirely because the pressure they were putting me under to "pull myself together" as if its just some switch. I needed to put my mental health as a priority. In the first few months I dropped weight rapidly and then emotional eating came in and I was eating everything and piled it all back on.

I was in a very very very dark place and I think I'm just about out of it now, well I'm the closest thing to "normal" I've been in quite some time. I still have my dark days and days where I hate the world but it's always getting better.

I know what you mean about ww. For me its because its something I can control especially when life throws things at you that no one can control.

Any way chicken if you feel like you need to talk to some one PM me I am here if you need to vent about anything.

Hugs and love for you :)
 

ellenwillbeskinny

I need chocolate now!!!
#3
Hi anj, I really feel for you. I can't work due to depression and anxiety and it has destroyed my self confidence. Since starting WW I feel I am achieving something by losing weight, it makes me feel like I am going somewhere if you know what I mean. Please pm me if you would like a chat, I have sent you a friend request. Mind yourself for now, ellen
 
#4
Thank you both so much for your messages. Sillykitten, I'm sorry I didn't reply sooner, I find it very difficult to talk about, except in a dismissive 'oh yeah, I'm crazy' sort of way.
I have another doctors appointment on Friday. I am getting a referral to see a psychiatrist so we shall see what happens with that. I'm releaved that something will finally happen after 12 years of feeling like this.
I'm also scared in case I don't like the person I become at the end of it all.
I have gone back to work. Been back four days now. I'm not sure it was the right decision (doc wanted me off longer but I chose to go back) .
I don't really like being left at home with my thoughts and I get really, really paranoid when I'm having down time. I work with my boyfriend and I was feeling horrible that I wasn't seeing him as much. I can't really explain it but for that part I'm feeling better anyway.
:-(
 
#5
I'm glad you're back to work. If you wanted to go back to work and you were able for it then it's the best thing. I was out of work for 2 years because of anxiety, I worked in retail and I will never work in retail again because of how it made me feel.

About being afraid of who you'll become, I had kinda the same fears. I did not want to be put on meds. I watched my sister get prescribed everything going, she was a shell of herself by the end and in my opinion they did nothing to help her. Just remember that you HAVE control, nothing can change who you are fundamentally unless you let it, teaching your brain to be nicer to you isn't going to change the person you are, its going to bring the real you out and let you shine :)
 
#7
I feel utterly miserable right now. :-(
 
#8
Aw are you ok hun? how are you getting on? Think you're probably better being in work as you'll have some routine in your life..I find keeping busy the best way of keeping depression at bay.

Oh you've achieved a really good weight loss in a short time btw, you should be proud of yourself! :)

I'm on anti-depressants so I feel your pain. The NHS has a free CBT course for depression called "living life to the full" that's good. There's another CBT course that's good here: Centre for Clinical Interventions (CCI) - Psychotherapy, Research, Training
This will help with the annoying thoughts etc!

Thought records are pretty good: http://www.minimins.com/lighter-life-forum/18903-how-do-thought-record.html
I've been doing some..if you look at the cci.gov.au one, it basically boils down to ABC DEF's
Activating Event-what happened
Belief-what you *thought*
Consequence-action (what you did and how you *felt*, rate your feeling)
Detective Work-evidence for and against belief
End Result-rate how you feel now
Follow through-do something to make yourself feel better
End Result-rate how you feel now

CBT basically believes that: thoughts->feelings-> behaviour.
That if you think about negative things, then you will feel bad, and then this will have a knock on effect on your behaviour i.e. maybe watch tv instead of going for a walk etc. When you're depressed, you go into a downward spiral so you have to start reversing that-weight watchers goes into detail with this about the food too, by advising people to make small incremental changes to their lifestyles etc.

Hope I haven't blathered on for too much but just thought I'd stick this in for anyone suffering from depression as it's so hard knowing what type of treatment is best to opt for etc. etc! x
 


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