'Your GP telling you you're obese is wrong and just weight bullying'

I can understand what you are saying Emsie, and yes, if you go with a cold it might not seem relevant. What I do know, as I have a friend who is a GP, who is currently under orders to cut their drugs bill down by 40 million quid, that they will be pushing people to help themselves, as many things can be caused by, or hindered by, obesity. So you might rock up with say, a skin fold infection, or bad acne, or persistent hip pain, and have your weight and diet questioned because of the simple fact that small changes can really make a big difference, and whilst it is never nice, GPs see people every day who are suffering by their own hand. The NHS resources are limited, and tightly squeezed, and if a GP thinks that a bit of blunt speak could prevent a future diabetes case, then its likely they will bring it up, because they are under so much pressure to cut costs.
totally agree
 
MadameLaMinx said:
I can understand what you are saying Emsie, and yes, if you go with a cold it might not seem relevant. What I do know, as I have a friend who is a GP, who is currently under orders to cut their drugs bill down by 40 million quid, that they will be pushing people to help themselves, as many things can be caused by, or hindered by, obesity. So you might rock up with say, a skin fold infection, or bad acne, or persistent hip pain, and have your weight and diet questioned because of the simple fact that small changes can really make a big difference, and whilst it is never nice, GPs see people every day who are suffering by their own hand. The NHS resources are limited, and tightly squeezed, and if a GP thinks that a bit of blunt speak could prevent a future diabetes case, then its likely they will bring it up, because they are under so much pressure to cut costs.

Whilst I do get the pressures on the NHS I really dislike the assumption made by GP's in general that you must live a bad lifestyle if you are overweight, or conversely, you must live a good lifestyle if you are slim. My friend is a perfect example. He has a healthy BMW, but eat rubbish all day long, drinks way above the recommended amount - all the time & takes a significant amount of illegal drugs, plus he smokes. He doesn't know what a feeble is unless you count chips. Even at my heaviest I led a more healthier lifestyle than him, and exercised more. Yet no GP has ever questioned his diet when he goes to see them. Funny that.
 
It happened to me - mine was, in a roundabout way, weight related and my doctor was quite brutal in the way she expressed it. She said she had been overweight and realised how hard it was to lose weight but I must do it if I wanted no more pain.
I went home and went nuts but when I calmed down realised she was right and started the following week when I had got myself sorted out.
I lost 5 stone and things were much better all round as well as pain free.
Over years (not months) I have gained 1 stone but that is coming off now.
 
Whilst I do get the pressures on the NHS I really dislike the assumption made by GP's in general that you must live a bad lifestyle if you are overweight, or conversely, you must live a good lifestyle if you are slim. My friend is a perfect example. He has a healthy BMW, but eat rubbish all day long, drinks way above the recommended amount - all the time & takes a significant amount of illegal drugs, plus he smokes. He doesn't know what a feeble is unless you count chips. Even at my heaviest I led a more healthier lifestyle than him, and exercised more. Yet no GP has ever questioned his diet when he goes to see them. Funny that.

Its as Emsie said, I think, that turning up to the GPs fat is a visible indication that something somewhere is not quite right. I daresay your friend doesnt go into the doctors with a spliff hanging out of his mouth, swigging from a bottle of vodka and munching on a kebab. If he did, I am sure the doc would have something to say. But I am glad to hear that he has a healthy BMW, if you are going to run an expensive car, its better to have it in good working order ;) My OH is much the same as your friend, although I think his chickens are about to come home to roost as when we went for a new patient appt at the GP today, they asked him to come in for screening for cholesterol etc, its an initiative for men over 40, so next week he has to go have a fasting blood test. I hope for his sake that theres nothing too horrendous to report but when you live on a diet of cheese sandwiches, pretty much, you are asking for a high cholesterol level...

Yes, there is a general assumption that GPs make, and it is never right to generalise when people are all individuals, but I daresay, if it got pulled up and you were living an otherwise very healthy lifestyle, the GP would be duty bound to investigate why in that case the person had a weight issue - and hopefully then treat the issue. Not all GPs are however good GPs, it is the same in any profession, there are good ones and bad ones, I have had my share of both, but I guess when you are tied down to investigating, diagnosing, or referring a person on in less than 7 minutes, it is easy to forget that they are individuals.
 
I also think GP could give abit more advise in losing weight! I'm 22 and before slimming world ididnt have a bad diet! I cooked all my meals from scratch, I don't drink very often, rarely had take away food and ate fruit and veg so it was hard for me to understand why I was over weight! But for the doctor to sit there and go oh you need to lose weight ok bye off you go see you when your abit fatter coZ I know your not going to do it (he didn't really say that but I bets that's what most of them think) with no advise on what to do I just felt like I was going round in circles and it was when I joined slimming world where it was such small things like using fry lite instead of oil, not putting butter and milk in mash, drinking more water, less bad carbs I have a thing for pastry but there always something that tell you it's home made it's healthy lol and just buy these small changes Iv lost 1.5 stones :) I'm not saying I want him to write me a plan to follow but maybe advise slimming world or ww to help you get started and give you some basic info on the on the clubs so then you can choose! I think if I doc had done this all them years ago then there might be a small chance I wouldn't be writing this now
 
MadameLaMinx said:
Its as Emsie said, I think, that turning up to the GPs fat is a visible indication that something somewhere is not quite right. I daresay your friend doesnt go into the doctors with a spliff hanging out of his mouth, swigging from a bottle of vodka and munching on a kebab. If he did, I am sure the doc would have something to say. But I am glad to hear that he has a healthy BMW, if you are going to run an expensive car, its better to have it in good working order ;) My OH is much the same as your friend, although I think his chickens are about to come home to roost as when we went for a new patient appt at the GP today, they asked him to come in for screening for cholesterol etc, its an initiative for men over 40, so next week he has to go have a fasting blood test. I hope for his sake that theres nothing too horrendous to report but when you live on a diet of cheese sandwiches, pretty much, you are asking for a high cholesterol level...

Yes, there is a general assumption that GPs make, and it is never right to generalise when people are all individuals, but I daresay, if it got pulled up and you were living an otherwise very healthy lifestyle, the GP would be duty bound to investigate why in that case the person had a weight issue - and hopefully then treat the issue. Not all GPs are however good GPs, it is the same in any profession, there are good ones and bad ones, I have had my share of both, but I guess when you are tied down to investigating, diagnosing, or referring a person on in less than 7 minutes, it is easy to forget that they are individuals.

Love ipad predictive text - can get you into all sorts of trouble :) You make great points as usual MLM. I think for me it basically comes down to me being the kind of person who tends to dig my heel in when told to do something by someone in supposed authority how to live my life. I do see why my friend doesn't get asked questions about his lifestyle,but maybe GP's need to be a bit more clever (they are supposed to be the intelligent ones after all :))about the way they approach these things. A) don't assume being blunt is going to the way to get someone to change. B) don't assume base on their appearance, what their lifestyle is. If they asked simple questions about lifestyle to ALL their patients then I imagine they would be surprised by the results, and might even be able to put to bed some for their misconceptions. It's no different to managing people in a business environment. Managers are supposed to adopt their management style based on the person they are managing. Thought to be fair in my experience most of them are terrible at it.

You have also cleared up for me why whenever I have been to the doc for something in the last year he has always told me to take a (usually more expensive than a prescription) over the counter medication for my ailment. Seems he is trying to cut his prescription bill abit.
 
I think your A and B tend to come with an ongoing long term relationship building up with a doctor, as they get to know you as a person, then they probably get a better idea of how to approach you - but if you dont go regularly, they pretty much forget who you are the minute you walk out the door, and with thousands of patients on their books, that isnt so surprising. So they take a standard approach, which will work with some people and not with others. Practices around here do look at general lifestyle when you join them, but after that, they dont seem to monitor or check other than at points where they are supposed to. I think managers probably have an easier time of it because they work day in and day out with the people they are supposed to manage, so they get to know them very well. But if you think they are bad at it, then you can surely understand that Doctors would find it very hard to use an individual approach successfully.

Dont get me wrong, I have had TERRIBLY insensitive doctors, and it is very damaging, so I know exactly what you mean when you say what you do, one GP I went to was so horrible that I left the surgery in floods of tears and didnt go back for nearly a year. When I did go back, I saw a different one, who asked why I hadnt come back, so I explained what had happened and he said "Wow, that doesn't sound like her, perhaps her husband hit her that morning or something!" (Very professional!!!) - I was in a very bad place with depression and she was SO dismissive, took no notice of what I was trying to convey to her and basically chucked me out with a prescription.

But I dont think they can really avoid stating what they see as the facts, or saying the things that the health service and the government insist on them telling people. The media has a lot to do with this too, headlines about us being the fattest country in Europe or the fifth fattest in the world or whatever, the government HATE that sort of stuff because of the inference that the country as a whole is just lazy and greedy and it is the governments fault for letting us get away with it. So they heap the pressure on to the health service and the health service has to do what they say and pass the message on. Its probably a badly gone wrong game of chinese whispers really. It started out with "Eat more cheese" and by the time it got to the GP and it was their turn to pass it on it ended up as "You're Obese."
 
Funny you should say that MLM, as it was eating too much cheese that made me obese :D
 
Wow... Her doc was only doing his job. She needs to not get butthurt about being called obese. It's her health at risk!
This might sound bad but it bugs me when larger people say, "I don't need to lose weight, I'm happy." I think, that's very good that you're happy as you are but you're putting yourself in serious danger of a heart attack or diabetes.
 
MissHarleyQuinn92 said:
Wow... Her doc was only doing his job. She needs to not get butthurt about being called obese. It's her health at risk!
This might sound bad but it bugs me when larger people say, "I don't need to lose weight, I'm happy." I think, that's very good that you're happy as you are but you're putting yourself in serious danger of a heart attack or diabetes.

Given that you know nothing about her lifestyle it's a big leap to just assume that she is in serious danger of heart attack or diabetes. I was big & obese for 15 years, but at no point was my blood pressure, cholesterol or blood sugar anything other than normal.
 
kingleds said:
Given that you know nothing about her lifestyle it's a big leap to just assume that she is in serious danger of heart attack or diabetes. I was big & obese for 15 years, but at no point was my blood pressure, cholesterol or blood sugar anything other than normal.

Im currently classed as obese and while I know I am 'at risk' of developing problems if I stay like this my blood sugar, blood pressure etc are all fine too. My only problem is like MLM in that my weight 'might' be preventing me from getting pregnant so I need to lose the weight for that. I just hate people on these forums calling other people fat. Yes im fat. I can call myself fat. But I would never call anyone else it under any circumstances.
And back to the Dr thing....I went to see my doc as my gym instructor wanted me to get confirmation that he was happy for me to do their (simple) fitness plan. He told me to lose weight first and take the plan back to him when I had. Errrmmm....WTF?!?!

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I've just crept over from another forum. I have a foot in both camps. I think gps have to be honest about the health consequences of obesity. I do however think that a lot are incredibly insensitive. I recently spoke to a very large lady who told me that she had suffered stabbing pains in her abdomen for months but was afraid to go to the doctor because she would be afraid that he would weigh her and humiliate her because she was obese.
 
Im currently classed as obese and while I know I am 'at risk' of developing problems if I stay like this my blood sugar, blood pressure etc are all fine too. My only problem is like MLM in that my weight 'might' be preventing me from getting pregnant so I need to lose the weight for that. I just hate people on these forums calling other people fat. Yes im fat. I can call myself fat. But I would never call anyone else it under any circumstances.
And back to the Dr thing....I went to see my doc as my gym instructor wanted me to get confirmation that he was happy for me to do their (simple) fitness plan. He told me to lose weight first and take the plan back to him when I had. Errrmmm....WTF?!?!

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Good point about not wanting others on here to call you fat. Made me think of the bingo advert on tv where the 2 women are in the street saying different bingo calls and the one says 2 fat ladies 88 and indicates to herself and the other one.....and the other one says are you saying I'm fat?!
And of course not everyone on here is fat some may have been or may just not be happy with their weight.
 
Jumping in.

1. Brutal honesty is sometimes what we need. My doc NEVER EVER mentioned my weight and only the consultant at the pain management clinic did. Loss of weight less occurrence of severe crippling back pain.

Please note- weight wasn't the cause but a major part of the cure.

2. Doctors actually only get 10 minutes allocated per patient. I was shocked to hear this from my sis who is a dr. I know that if I was expected to see patients within a certain timescale and some of their problems were directly linked with weight then perhaps I would lose my 'tact' also.

Not right but true.

3. These people have studied for 10 years (approx according to speciality) so we do have to trust what they say.

4. We are a nation who sue. We feel entitled. Look at America- we are following in their footsteps. If you say that you 'choose' your own lifestyle and don't like when a doc talks about your weight then go elsewhere. Teachers are not allowed to say to a teenager "that's bad" but "that's bad behaviour - but this is what you did well". Look at where a loss of blunt honesty is doing for us.

These points are not "getting at anyone" but just my experience. I've watched my sister study endlessly and worked 60 hr weeks with 2 children under the age of 4 and she still isn't finished at 28. She knows her stuff.

If you find this tough to take, let's call it a difference of opinion and please not it's 4.14 am and I'm awake in a crap load of back pain having put on a stone in comfort/stress eating. Irony eh?
 
I don't agree with a lot of the points you make including about childrens behaviour but I'm sure your sister worked very hard. I don't want to argue either but did want to point out that we shouldn't always trust what drs say they do make mistakes and get things wrong!
I hope your back is feeling better I too am also awake with back pain despite having lost 9 stone, also quite ironic maybe
 
With regard to point 4, and this astounded me the other day - when I was at new doctors the other day seeing the nurse for my new patient appointment, she asked me had I had a smear, and I told her I was due one. She said they now have to get patients to sign disclaimers to say that they are aware of the need for regular smear testing because people are beginning to claim that "they didn't know they were due one, or didn't get the letter" and are trying to sue doctors when they are diagnosed with cervical cancer.

I cannot believe that people would go to such lengths. It's a pretty sad state of affairs.
 
I would really love to be able to trust doctors, but there are so many instances of them failing to do their job properly that it becomes difficult to respect them, regardless of how much training they've had. You don't even have to go outside this forum to find an instance of gross negligence on the part of a GP. There's a girl on the unthoughtful people thread whose dad has been going to his GP for the last 2 years complaining of rudeness, being under the weather etc. GP did nothing, now her dad finds out he's got terminal cancer. I'm not a fan of the blame & sue culture at all, but surely that GP should be struck off?
 
*Emsie* said:
I don't agree with a lot of the points you make including about childrens behaviour but I'm sure your sister worked very hard. I don't want to argue either but did want to point out that we shouldn't always trust what drs say they do make mistakes and get things wrong!
I hope your back is feeling better I too am also awake with back pain despite having lost 9 stone, also quite ironic maybe

I agree with not always having to trust as you say because they have studied for 10 years lol... Milgrams theory comes to mind!!
 
They are human and will make mistakes but I'm sure that the times they are right certainly outweigh the times they are wrong.

For example, I certainly remember more of my mistakes than I do my good work.

Maybe government should put more attention to not closing as many local hospitals which at the moment is forcing local doctors to work night duty to keep waiting lists down. I know this could go beyond a grass roots level discussion lol.

My original point is that maybe if my doc had said about weight loss i wouldn't have had an extra 5 years of extreme pain and a poor liver of high painkillers - have a lovely Sunday everyone. X
 
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