Your opinion please....I'm i over reacting??

[Fuzzys Angel]

?????

I am so angry but should i be? I would really like your opinion on this?!

Just got back from Tesco's shopping & feel so mad, this ramdon guy came up to me & basically came on to me!!!!

This is what happened:

He stop me in tesco & says: 'i hope you don't mind me asking but where did you originally came from?'
ME: London, why?
GUY: No i mean what country?
ME: London, i was born here!
GUY: Are you fully English? or mixed race?
ME: English as are the rest of my family, why?
GUY: Well you look if you are partly Spanish!! (i've been told this before, mum thinks on her dads side going back through the generations there was Spanish)
ME: Oh! No afraid not, just English! (went to walk off!)
GUY: I've been watching you walk around shopping & thought cor, what a figure, you're gorgeous!!
Very embarrassed i smiled politely & went to walk off, he continued.
Are you with anyone?
ME: Yes! I'm very happily married
Guy: I bet you get this all the time? Would you like to go for a drink sometime?
ME: NO!!! i'm very happy with my husband!
GUY: he doesn't have to know!
ME: Yes he does i tell him everything & i don't think he'd appreciate you hitting on his wife
GUY: go on, one drink
I was getting really annoyed & ending up telling him to 'P!SS OFF & LEAVE ME ALONE'

I'm sick of men like this!! When i was over weight no one gave me a second look but now i'm slim i get the attention & i hate it , this is the fourth person that has tryed to hit on me in 2 weeks (3 or them were patients at work! )

I rang my mum & told what had happened she said although this particular guy was over the top & out of order, i should enjoy the rest of the compliments but i DON'T

I'm so angry at the moment i just feel like stuffing my face & if i put back some of the weight it might stop!!!

What do you think? Am i over reacting??

xxx

 

[Sam]

Honestly I really think that you are over reacting. I would be happy if some guy would call me attractive or ask me to go out for a drink. Even if you say no it is a nice compliment I think. Unfortunately this doesn't happen really often to me. Probably because I am over weight, but I really hope that it will happen noon.

 

[kila]

He sounds like an as*hole.
The hitting on you part was fine, but it was after he knew you were married and continued that he turned into a dick IMO.

You're still a sexy beeatch though!!! XXXX

 

[Mochaj]

I think you should try to feel flattered with the compliments, you've done so well!

However, that guy was crossing the line in my opinion, as soon as you told him you were happily married I think he should have apologised and backed off! So, no, I don't think feeling angry about it is an over-reaction, I think I'd have found that pretty creepy to be honest. Maybe that's just me

 

[California girl]

same as the above treat it as a compliment you are obviously a hot chicky!! but hes definately a weirdo for stalking you after the initial dis!!!

 

[clairelesley]

Yes and no.
Personally, I like a bit of attention, and am a huge flirt.
On the other hand, it should be a bit of fun and if someone doesn't get the message or is all pushy, it's irritating.
And then you have all these articles saying how supermarkets are the best place to pull....
I'd be annoyed but not actually angry; does it count as a compliment even if it's from a muppet? Ah well, either way he's obviously not important enough to you to let it bother you for long!

 

[Mrs V]

I don't think you over reacted!!!

The compliments were very nice to begin with, but it sounded a little creepy when he mentioned that he has watched you walking around! Not only that, but he should have backed off when you told him you were married!!!

 

[Fuzzys Angel]

Thanx for your replies...

Maybe i should learn to take compliments but i've never been very good at that, not even from my hubby!! Even last night whilst watching 'How to look good naked'(i love that progreamme), i said to my OH i'd love to go on that. He told me that when Gok put the big pic up for people to comment on, I'd be the only person ever to turn around & say 'they're only saying nice things coz it's on TV'....lol Recieving compliments is not my strong point!!!

As for this guy in Tesco, he was creepy & not even good looking....lol

xxxx

 

[LENNY4974]

I have to say that it would be flattering to start with but he should have walked away when you said that you were married and obviously not interested. He became an arse when he wouldn't get the message...BUT......

Please do not stuff your face to cope with your anger - NO creep is worth undoing some of your hard work.

I hope you feel better soon - you have to remember some men are shallow and the fact that they have only noticed you now shows just how shallow they are. Your husband obviously loves you no matter what - he is a rare breed and you should give him a big hug.

Take care

 

[Sambucca]

I agree with the others Mandi, at first I would have accepted it as a huge compliment. You must at least feel a little bit flattered by the attention. But he defo did cross the line when he continued after you told him you were married, I think he got off lightly with you telling him to p!ss off, I probably would have kneed him in the goolies!

 

[nessie]

I agree with everyone else, he went too far, pushing for u to have an affair basically! But, don't dwell on it hun just shake it off and keep going, the world is full of creepy assholes unfortunately! DO take some of it as a compliment tho

 

[kopcat]

I, too, have an issue with taking compliments! My problem stems from never being good enough as a child, and then a 17 year relationship where I was constantly put down. When I came to the end of my tether and ended that relationship, I went for some counselling - to help me raise my self-esteem and confidence. I'd lost a lot of weight at the time, due to the stress of the break-up - but still saw myself as fat, unlikeable and unloveable. I learned how to just say "thank you" to compliments (whether I believed them or not) and also to think about how boring and wearing it was for others to hear me constantly putting myself down. Over time I practised what I'd been taught and it really did become easier to accept compliments

I met the most fantastic man about 8 months after my split (like you I have my very own toy boy ) and we married at the end of August (just 17 months after meeting). I didn't believe I could be or deserved to be so happy - and I never thought I'd be with someone who paid me so many compliments, and on such a regular basis! (Unfortunately that happiness brought a renewed interest in food hence me now CDing ).

Hope you didn't mind the essay - just thought we had a little in common there.

PS I had a similar incident in a supermarket (when I was single)...but the whole thing took place by the checkouts (and before my counselling/self-esteem building). I was soooooo uncomfortable and must have looked it. I asked him to leave me alone, but he didn't - and everyone else (the place was heaving) just stood around and watched. I was MORTIFIED! Your bloke today sounds like a total w***er!?!! - don't give him another thought!

 

[Fuzzys Angel]

. and also to think about how boring and wearing it was for others to hear me constantly putting myself down.

Thanx for that Kopcat, this sentence has really made me stop & think about what it must be like for my wonderful husband. He is always paying me compliments & i just tell him he's bias, maybe i shouldn't be doing that?!

He is always telling me that i don't see what others see, perhaps i should seriously consider getting some counselling so i can learn to deal with my own body image

Thank you....xxx

 

[mommysue]

take it all as compliments, that you can attract the eye of another bloke cos ur now slim and sexy ! like you i have found that patients come on to you , i had a young guy buy me a pack of monster munch and then asked me to bedbath him . politely told him that there was buggar all wrong with hands and to do himself . on the wards though , you laugh it off.... well most of the time .mind those were the days when i was a size 12/14 before marriage . had to ask an sho to remove his hand off my knee, cheeky swine..... oooh how i would love those days again . now im a district nurse and its all old codgers!!!
just enjoy words from others as compliments, you have achieved so much and people see a beautiful attractive lady before them . laugh it off and go home to your hubby ....:ashamed0005:

 

[fatpossum]

I think you're over reacting when you say that you want to eat in order to gain weight and reduce the amount of attention you've been getting since turning into a babe!! STEP AWAY FROM THAT DOUGHNUT NOW!

But that creep (which is what he was!) probably comes on to all sorts of women for all sorts of reasons.

........ That or your husband had become insecure and set up a 'Honey Trap' and you passed - Hooray!!!!!!!

 

[GotTheTShirt]

My hubby loves it if someone tries to chat me up. He sees it as a great compliment to me and an ego boost to him 'cos i'm on his arm. He knows i'll only be with him and tell anyone else where to go if they don't take no for an answer (not that it happens very often).

The guy was an arse and should have backed off when you said you were married. Some people just don't understand the polite brush off and need a more direct approach. Well done.

 

[julesrush]

easy way i find to stop attention you dont want is tell them you once were a man, works everytime for me lol

julesrush
cdc norwich